


Smoke and Retribution

by kuresoto



Series: Chances [1]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Fairy Tale, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Attempted Sexual Assault, Bluebeard rewrite, Class Differences, F/M, Fairy Tale Retellings, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Minor Character Death, Serial Killer!Kylo Ren, Steampunk elements, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-14
Updated: 2016-09-17
Packaged: 2018-08-15 00:43:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 53,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8035615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kuresoto/pseuds/kuresoto
Summary: Rey, a scavenger from the lowest district of Corellia, is less than thrilled when a man in purple propositions her to steal from Ben Solo, but with a knife pressed against her neck, she doesn’t have much of a choice. When Unkar Plutt casts her out onto the streets for breaking into a house in the upper district, she has nowhere to go. Unable to find the purple man, Rey is forced to venture into the upper district once more and confront Ben Solo about her predicament. After all, he’s the reason she’s in this mess to begin with. Bluebeard rewrite for Reylo Fanfiction Anthology 2016: Keeping the Stars Apart





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My Bluebeard rewrite for the Reylo Fanfiction Anthology Fairytail project! It's been a wild ride and I'm pretty happy with what I wrote. I struggle with completing long fics so this was a challenge for me!
> 
> [I made an aesthetic thing here ](http://kuresoto.tumblr.com/post/141543979988/made-some-graphics-for-my-bluebeard-fic-as-part-of)
> 
> Thank you to [feckyeswriting](http://feckyeswriting.tumblr.com/)/firelord65 for helping me during my early first draft. Thank you [lariren-shadow](http://lariren-shadow.tumblr.com/), [mnemehoshiko](http://mnemehoshiko.tumblr.com/)/bittersnake and [politicalmamaduck](http://politicalmamaduck.tumblr.com/) for helping me iron out the details and make my story better overall.
> 
> Shout-out to [reyloporn](http://reyloporn.tumblr.com/) who did art for this fic! [You can see it in all it's glory here!](https://reyloporn.tumblr.com/post/152707411321/as-part-of-the-reyloanthology-i-had-the-privilege)
> 
> Part of the Reylo Anthology: Keeping The Stars Apart zine, [viewable here!](http://www.reyloanthology.com/post/152653509080/this-project-hardly-needs-further-introduction)
> 
>  ~~I plan to post every day or every other day so it shouldn't be too long between chapters :)~~ I lied. I'm posting the rest in one swoop lmao

_If our love was a story book, we would meet on the very first page. –Shayne Ward_

 

Prologue

 

Despite the darkening skies and the looming clouds overhead, Rey, no more than nine years old, ran down the street before ducking into a darkened alleyway. She panted, chest heaving and gasping for air as she tried to regain her breath after running for several blocks. Anger coursed through her veins while she recalled the conversation that had sent her in a blind rage in the first place. The biting cold winds would normally cause her to shiver, but not on this night. At least, not whilst her blood boiled and her face flushed with anger.

Spying a loose can on the ground, she began kicking it down the alleyway, taking satisfaction in the distance and the loud clanging of the can bouncing off the cobblestone floor.

“Could you not do that?”

The girl jumped back, startled by a deep voice. She searched around for the owner of the voice and almost tripped over a pair of long, lanky legs in the process. Turning around, she had to squint in the dark to just make out the shape of a man, back propped up against the wall with his head tipped down.

Curiously, she stepped closer. “Wot’sit to ya.”

The man grumbled. “It’s not polite to cause a ruckus or disturb people at night. Didn’t your parents teach you a thing called _manners_?”

The girl let out a sharp bark of laughter causing the man to cringe from the loud noise. She dropped into a low squat in front of the man, trying to catch his eye in the darkness. “Me mam an’ pa are gone, mate. Dun ya know it’s rude to lie on the floor an’ block the pathway?”

“Kriff, do you not speak Basic?”

“I can, jus’ choose not ta.” The girl looked indignified at the snort the man let out. “I can but then that would be rather strange, wouldn’t it?” Like a switch, her rough accent smoothed into another dialect, a posh one, but not of Corellia. If the man looked surprised, Rey wasn't able to see it from the shadows. “A street urchin who can speak Basic, much less the way I do? That’s bound to turn a few heads so imma stick to ma ‘peasant’ accent, thanks,” she said, lifting her fingers to make air quotation marks in the process.

“Who are you?” he whispered.

“‘Am nobody, mate. ‘Sides,” the girl started, looking around the alley, noticing it was just them. “Wot ye doin’ lyin’ there for?”

“Look, for my sake, boy, could you just…speak normally for now?” Ignoring her mistaken gender, she cocked her head to the side and observed the man. The light rain from earlier made his long scraggly black locks clump with rainwater, hair hanging over his face as he held the bridge of his nose between his fingers in annoyance. Besides that, however, there weren’t many features the girl could see in the darkness. As she lifted herself to full height, she noticed that he had an arm slung across his midriff, long fingers clutching his abdomen as if injured.

She wandered closer to the entrance of the alleyway and into the bright area of the main road. “If you’re injured, you should get it looked at before it gets worse.” The man remained silent.

Leaning on the edge of a sandstone wall, she looked out onto the abandoned streets. She had calmed down slightly and was starting to feel the bite of the chilly night. In her rush, she didn’t bring a jacket and with the initial heat from running six blocks fading, her loose pants and oversized shirt were not appropriate for the cold winter night. Her lack of footwear didn’t help either, dirt caking between the soles of her feet. She rubbed her arms, feeling her skin pimple as she tried to will the cold away. At the same time, her stomach grumbled from not having eaten since early in the morning.

Just as she started to entertain the idea of returning to the house where her ‘family’ was (the idea of calling _them_ family made her sick to her stomach), she saw a bright light coming closer and closer. Shielding her eyes from the harsh light, she could just make out two figures – policemen, she guessed, patrolling the streets.

Being the only person in plain sight on the street, the policemen immediately moved towards her until they stood before her, shining their torches into her eyes. In spite of their abrasive actions, Rey squinted past the bright light and just made out the white uniforms that donned their bodies. The pair had matching jackets, white and crisp, neatly buttoned up with a white leather band firmly draped across their chest. Contrasting starkly with their white suit jackets and pants were the shiny black boots that went up to their knees. On their chest were three black circles, indicating their rank.

“Hey kid, what you doing out at this time?”

She lowered her head and pulled her squashed hat she had on further over her face. “Ya, sorry ‘bout dat’. Jus’ felt like goin’ for a walk, ya know?”

The policemen looked at her suspiciously and continued. “There’s been a murder nearby, some poor Lord stabbed to death. Have you seen anything while out on your...’walk’?”

“Nah, nuttin’ out of da ordinary.”

As she kept her head down and waited for the policemen to move along, she noticed how still the man behind her became. She stored that fact away for future use, knowing better than to help such high ranking officers.

“Come on, we still have a lot of ground to cover. No use wasting our time with some street scum,” the officer said to his partner.

Gritting her teeth, she nodded and watched them walk down the footpath until they rounded the corner, disappearing from sight. It was rare for anyone to realise that she was actually a girl, what with how she dressed. In addition to her baggy clothes and the flat hat she squished all her hair into, the grease and dirt that smudged across her face hid her gender efficiently. If anyone ever saw how long her hair was, framing her face like an angel, Rey knew she would never be mistaken for a boy.  At the tender age of nine, she was still small and could use her youth to her advantage. However, she dreaded the day when she could no longer hide in plain sight.

She waited a total of three seconds after the officers disappeared before snapping her head back towards the injured man, questions on the tip of her tongue. Before she could get any word out, she watched as the man tried to stagger to his feet, hands pressed against the wall for support.

“Hey!” Rushing to his side, she helped him stand properly until she was sure he wouldn’t fall over. “You shouldn’t move if you’re hurt. It’s dangerous to be here at all if you’re hurt but-”

He cut her off before she could finish her chastisement. “Why didn’t you report me?”

Now that she was close enough to him, she gazed up and saw his face for the first time, unobstructed by his hair. He wasn’t very old, maybe nearly of age, if not already, and seemed like a handsome man. Even though a frown marred his face, his strong features indicated that he was most probably of noble upbringing – there was no way someone growing up on the streets would keep a face that handsome and not be kicked in by the street gangs of Corellia.

His listless eyes hiding behind his stringy hair bored into her, making her restless. She avoided his eyes, tilting her head to the side, knocking her hat off her head in the process. Immediately, she let go of the man and reached down to snatch it from the puddle it had fallen in, roughly shoving it back over her hair once more. She hoped that he didn’t notice her three buns she hid from view, but she knew it was wishful thinking. When she turned to him again, she could see the moment of realisation dawning on the man, finally realising that she wasn’t a scraggly boy, but a scraggly girl instead.

Holding his midsection, he scrutinized her. “Who are you?” he asked again.

She coughed, kicking the ground absentmindedly and dropping her voice to a low falsetto that was obviously not her own. “Like I said, I’m nobody. And I know better than to involve the Corellian Security Force. It’s best to avoid them, if you can help it.”

He nodded minutely and stumbled away from her. “You should forget what you saw here tonight.”

She crossed her arms. “Same goes to you,” she mumbled, not caring if he heard.

Looking down, she grimaced at the patches of blood that were stained on her oversized shirt from when she helped him to his feet. He paused and looked at her appearance, as if wanting to apologize for inconveniencing her but at the same time ask more about her. At her defensive stand, he quickly shut his mouth and stumbled down the alleyway with speed that was impressive of an injured man. She hummed to herself, perfectly happy with neither getting involved in the other’s business.

Sighing deeply, she accepted that she had to return to her ‘home’. There wasn’t any clean water around for her to wash her shirt, but the pain of needing food was becoming unbearable. Kneeling by a puddle, she scooped some water and dumped it on her shirt, scrubbing it furiously, hoping the blood stains would fade to a light brown. She tried not to cringe at the heavy metallic smell of blood that she couldn’t help but breath in. With dirt on her hands from the puddle, she rubbed her palms into her shirt, satisfied that it just looked like she fell on the ground, rather than help a probable murderer escape.

As she slowly made her way back to her make-shift home, she tried not to stumble on the uneven path. As she neared the district borders, she hoped to cleanly slip by whoever was on duty. Hunger pains had weakened her and injuring herself or getting caught due to clumsiness was the last thing she needed.

The heavy metal barricade that blocked her exit came into view but Rey breathed a sigh of relief seeing the young man stationed at the border. Relaxing her shoulders, she stepped from the shadows and neared the guard. “Finn.”

The man, Finn, turned around at the sound of his name. “Rey? Kriff, what are you doing here at this time? It’s not safe! I heard that there was a murder in this district so there’s more guards on duty tonight.”

Unlike the previous guards Rey ran into, Finn’s uniform was not white, but a dark charcoal grey instead. Everything else was the same, golden lining with a similar band draped across his chest. “Plutt told me ‘is plan fo’ me,” said Rey, slipping back into her street accent.

She didn’t need to elaborate for Finn to know what Plutt said. “I’m sorry, Rey.”

“Dun worry, I figure it out. I always do.”

“That’s good. I’m sorry again, Rey. For leaving,” he elaborated. “I couldn’t stay in that place.”

Rey tensed her shoulders at the sound of his apology. “It’s fine. I haven’ seen ya ‘round. Wot’s wif ya? Wot’s wif...this?” She gestured at the uniform.

“Well, I had to resort to what I knew to survive. I stole from an officer, which _I know_ is risky, but he gave me a second chance. Helped me more than Plutt ever could.”

“Wot? So yer one of _them_ now?” The venom in her voice did not go amiss.

“You might not understand it now, Rey, but you will in the future. You can’t stay there forever. The officer who helped me, he’s on his way to becoming a detective. He’s promised to mentor me and make me a detective too. Not _all_ of them are bad, Rey.”

“Na’ all of us can ‘ave the same faith in them as ye can, Finn. Na’ all of us can be so lucky.”

Finn sighed hearing the hostility return to her voice. “Get out of here, Rey. I wish the best for you, I really do.”

Not needed to be told twice, Rey quickly slipped past him into her home district without a second glance at him.

As she moved through the abandoned streets, Rey passed a flickering lamppost. Her eyes were drawn to an alleyway that was illuminated from the nearby light. She saw an unmoving lump on the ground, positive that it was a child who had succumbed to the cold or starvation or even the heavy air pollution of the lowest district. This was a normal way of life for Rey – police officers becoming frantic at the possibility of a rich man being murdered but ignored the hundreds of people who died from living on the streets. Shaking her head, Rey willed herself to move on from those thoughts. Thinking about the gentry’s discrimination never helped anyone.

However, her eyes softened at the very idea of what her life could have been. If her gang didn’t find her when they did…if they didn’t listen to her pleas and cries…Rey shivered at the possibility.

She was extremely fortunate and grateful for her gang. She held no memory of her parents, only being told that she was abandoned on the streets. Her current family - the local gang who had stumbled upon her pitiful self - thankfully found a use for her. That was years ago and she could barely remember that far, only the distant memory of pain and coldness from that night. Despite all this, Rey would be a lot more grateful if her leader hadn’t just informed her of his plans for her, as if she had no choice in the matter. No, she would not bend to his request.

Then, flickering like the lamppost, an idea slowly came to her. Yes, instead of spending the rest of her life on her back like the rest of the of-age girls in her gang did, she would become someone more valuable.

Stopping in front of rickety two storey-house that was far more run down than the others on the block, she jumped up and braced her hands and feet on the slippery stone walls. Trying her best to swallow her grunts of exhaustion and stave off her hunger pains, she slung her foot over the nearby window ledge and slipped into the house with an ungraceful thump.

The house was brightly lit inside, so navigating her way to her leader was a breeze.  Taking a deep breath, she set her shoulders back and held her head up high. Twisting the knob in her hand, she pushed the door open – her resolve to become something more than a whore firm in her mind.  

Before she could set a foot into the dimly lit room, the deep voice of the crime boss and the leader of her gang stopped her in her tracks.

“Welcome back, Rey. Have you accepted your fate?”

She refused to let the man unnerve her. “Nah, bu’ I ‘ave an idea that could increase yer profits, if handled properly.”

At the sight of the large man approaching her with a hint of curiosity and interest shining in his large eyes, Rey knew she had won. No one would dictate her future but her.

 


	2. Chapter 2

_Happiness is not something ready-made.  It comes from your own actions. –Dalai Lama_

 

Chapter One

 

Now nineteen years old, Rey hung in the shadows behind a bar, still dressed in dirty brown rags with her hair in three buns. She remained still, eyes trained on a man dressed in a blue suit that looked as worn as the man’s face, entering the bar. Toeing off her heavy boots, she slipped through the side window that lead to the store room, falling gracefully on her sock-clad feet. The room was dark and quiet, perfect for Rey to blend into her surroundings. Rey moved towards the door, allowing a thin blade of light to enter the room as she peeked out into the bustling bar.

The bar’s interior was made of panels of wood with heavy tables scattered across the floor for patrons to dine and socialise, heavy vapours of steam and smoke wafting from the large pipes on the walls and relaxing the customers. On the far wall near the entrance was a long benchtop and behind it, various bottles of different colours balanced on numerous shelves. A single man with a black leather top hat was stationed behind the bar, polishing a glass mug as he watched over his customers. However, the yellow hue of the exposed light bulbs hanging through the brass pipe ceiling was not bright enough for the bartender to spot her.

With stealth honed from years of scavenging and pickpocketing, Rey slid along the hardwood floors, soundless as she moved closer to her target. The man with the crumpled blue suit was slouched in his stool, the ends of his jacket hanging off the side of his seat as he covered his face with his hands, fingers rubbing his temples. Rey quickly ducked under an unoccupied high table as a waitress placed a large pint of bubbling gold liquid with smoke rolling from the lip of the glass in front of him. Grinning, she realised it would be easier than she anticipated.

As the man left his drink untouched, waiting for the smoke to subside, Rey ducked from table to table, her socks allowing her to move undetected. With a hand holding onto a nearby copper pillar, she stretched her hand and reached across from the table she was under to where the man was seated, back exposed and facing her.

Biting her lip, she slipped her hand gently into his jacket pocket and wrapped her fingers around the distinct fabric of a coin pouch. Rey smiled triumphantly, pulling the bag of credits from his silk-lined pocket and held it close to her. Yes, this would do nicely. Tucking it into her small side pouch, she started to make her way back to the store room for a clean getaway when a shout from the bar caught her attention.

“Hey you! What are you doin’ there?!”

Rey whipped her head to the bartender, eyes widening at the finger pointed directly at her. She looked around wildly, trying to ascertain what she did that made her get caught. Seated further along the bar was a short man with a black cloth covering his mouth and a pair of heavy black goggles over his face. Rey narrowed her eyes; she didn’t need any hints to know who tipped the bartender to her activities.

Gritting her teeth, she doubled her efforts to get out of the bar. There was no need to crouch and hide so she sprinted to the storeroom, using her hands to rocket herself over tables and get there faster. Kicking the door open, Rey quickly ran to the open window and jumped out, shoving her dirty boots on before sprinting down the street.

Rey bumped and pushed through the crowd, not caring for the disgruntled shouts or the yells of the bar owner. She had to get back to her district quickly. As she rounded a corner, she collided with something that felt like a wall but was significantly softer. A hand shot out and grabbed her wrist, stopping her from falling to the ground from the collision. Blinking confusedly, Rey looked up and saw a large man with a grey suit and a top hat perched on his head, his black hair tied back at the base of his neck. He looked down at her from behind his circular black lenses, using the curve of his polished black cane in his hand to tip his hat upward to get a better look at her.

Before she could remain under the man’s scrutiny any longer, she ripped her hand from his grasp and darted past him, the shouts of the angry bartender coming closer and closer. “Sorry,” she muttered, putting as much distance as she could from the bar.

Nearing the wall that separated the districts of Corellia, Rey spied a rusty fire escape on the side of a building. Hoisting herself up, she quickly climbed the vertical steps, kicking the lever at the first landing to make the ladder rise from the reach of the man below.

“If I catch you in my bar ever again…!” The man didn’t need to finish the sentence for Rey to understand his warning. Begrudgingly, the man stomped back to his bar when it was apparent that he would not be able to catch her.

The sun was moving high in the sky, its rays angled and making Rey squint under the harsh light. She pulled a set of green lensed goggles from her pouch and slipped them over her eyes, breathing a sigh of relief before continuing her journey upwards.

Jumping from roof to roof was easy. It was something she had to learn when she had first started her life as a pickpocket. She could have stayed in the slums where she lived, stole from others in the same situation as her, but it wouldn’t give her the profit she needed to keep herself off her back. In order to avoid the lifestyle of women in her gang, she had to constantly prove to her leader that she was more useful as a scavenger than as a whore.

The men in her gang were skeptical, refusing to help her or teach her the ins and outs of the districts, but she caught on quickly. All she had to do was watch what they did from afar. It was simple enough and eventually, the pickpockets of her gang accepted her presence. They tolerated her but never directly interfered with her jobs. Well, _most_ stayed out of her way.

Rey slid down another ladder and landed in a dark alleyway. The tall buildings on her left and the wall on her right shrouded her in shadows, blocking all sunlight and allowing her to move undetected. The sandstone walls that separated districts were old and built long before Rey was born. With its smooth edges as well as the sheer height, it was impossible to climb over and was successful at keeping the citizens within their own areas. However, there was another way for Rey to move between the middle and lower districts with ease.

Throughout the wall were thick vines of green and red, the plants as old as the wall. Rey stopped in front of a thick section of vines and moved them aside, revealing a hole in the wall. It wasn’t overly large, but it was big enough for her to squeeze through.

Arriving at the other side, Rey grunted and pulled herself up from her hands and knees, dusting her pants and propping her circular goggles on her forehead. Before her was not the semi clean streets of the middle district, but the derelict ones of the lowest district.

After arranging the vines on her side of the wall to cover the hole, Rey started to climb the walls of the rickety buildings. Unlike the other districts, the lowest one did not care much about the appearance of buildings. If they held and were structurally sound, no one paid much attention if the walls were uneven or if the bricks stuck out in all directions.

Once on the roof, Rey gazed out into the distance. The difference in air quality as well as cleanliness was astounding. Behind her, her district was filled with heavy smog from heavy machinery, which required everyone to wear goggles and have a scarf on hand in case the air pollution became too thick. Food was scarce in her district and the idea of spending their minimal credits on trivial items was unheard of.

The other districts, however, did not have such a struggle. As one progressed through the districts and had more credits, one had the ability to afford better machines, with engines that were quieter and produced no pollution. When she was younger, she used to aspire to get out of the dingy streets of the lower districts, but now she realised it was easier said than done. The closest she could get to escaping her district was through the hole in the wall and even then, she knew she always had to return to the slums. While there was no specific rule that forbade anyone from different districts from crossing into others, there were guidelines in place that made it harder. A district pass was available, allowing citizens to pass through borders unhindered. It wasn’t overly pricey but it was unnecessary; only people who could comfortably afford it would own one. That or people who could get their hands on fake ones.

Moving from building to building was even easier in the lowest district, only having to walk rather than jump over gaps. She paused in her journey home and looked from the rooftops over a marketplace. With her stomach grumbling, she slid down a nearby pipe to pilfer an apple from a nearby stand. The brown withered apple in her hand was a poor excuse for food, compared to the shiny red ones she had seen in the middle district. Sometimes she wondered if she should try her luck at the middle district marketplace and buy proper food with the credits she had stolen, but thinking back to a failed attempt in her first week of pickpocketing, she reminded herself to abstain. Not only did the shopkeepers refuse to sell anything to someone that obviously looked like they were not from that district, but the beating she received from Unkar Plutt taught her to think twice before deceiving him again.

Unkar Plutt, a low-level Corellian crime boss and the man who took her in when she was abandoned as a child, was the leader of her gang. He often wore an old purple suit that frayed on its edges but was respectable enough for the shopkeepers in the middle district to sell him food. In turn, that food would be portioned throughout the gang, depending on how hard they worked and how much they were able to steal. Despite being the best of his scavengers, Rey was never given extra food. She was given the same, if not slightly less than the rest of the scavengers. She used to question it but it became apparent that each time she was treated fairly, the other pickpockets would try to sabotage her jobs, tipping off shopkeepers before she could retrieve the credits she needed.

Thinking back to the man who tipped off the bartender earlier, Rey clenched her fist and spat the rotten fruit from her mouth. “Teedo,” she whispered venomously. Tossing the half eaten apple aside, she started to weave through the marketplace, passing a set of white uniformed officers in the process.

“I cannot believe we’ve been stationed in this dump.” The officer stopped by a stand with an assortment of discolored meats. “How desperate do you have to be to actually buy this?” the officer said mockingly, disgust laced in his voice as he took a handful of the warm meat and flung it against the muddy road. Rey watched as the stall owner cowered at the sight of the officer glaring at them before stomping on rotten flesh.

“Well, it’s better than having to deal with the Kylo Ren murders in the upper district. Each time a new case appears, I hear it gets very hot for the head detective. Rumors have it that if Detective Dameron doesn’t find out who Kylo Ren is, he’ll be sacked and taken to court by the Bluebloods for not doing his job,” his partner said absentmindedly, nonplussed by the officer’s actions.

A chuckle. “Poor bastard. Who’s next in line?”

“That kid, Finn Evans, I think.”

“Dameron’s protege? Doubt he’ll have better luck. It’s what they get for thinking they’re better than us.”

Rey’s brows furrowed at the conversation she overheard. It had been so long since she had last heard, much less thought, of the man who let her back into her district that night ten years ago. She briefly wondered what was going on with his life, but hearing the two officers talk so nonchalantly about murders and their fellow comrades, as well as their treatment of people in her district, left a vile taste in her mouth. Pushing any thoughts of Finn out of her mind, Rey continued her journey through the marketplace. If she lingered around any longer, she was afraid she would confront the officers.

As ideal as the middle and upper districts sounded, she knew it was more complicated than having enough credits to live peacefully. ‘Survival’ mean something different to people in the higher districts. Status and wealth controlled how they behaved and with whom they interacted. She had seen it in the blue suited man she had just stolen from. Rey knew him from when he used to live in the lowest district, before he was able to escape the mines and make a living for himself.

The only way to permanently leave the lowest district was to work the mines. They paid enough credits that if saved and utilised wisely, could be the ticket out of the slums. However, the steam and the toxic fumes that the miners were subjected to made it very hard to survive long enough to even enjoy the credits. It was a gamble, but between dying on the streets and the possibility of living long enough to break free of the derelict district, many people still saw hope in working the mines. Rey merely snorted at their misplaced hope.

Rey had watched the man leave the lowest district. She saw how _happy_ he was, being able to afford nice clothes as if they would turn him into someone that mattered. Mere days passed before she saw his eyes become sunken and permanent worry lines appear on his face. It was horrible to pry on someone who had been in her situation but it made her job easier. Finally, when he was at his wits end, she struck and stole what he had.

The heavy pouch of credits reminded her of what was important. Steal, get credits, get food, survive another day. Nothing else mattered.

Stopping in front of a rundown house, Rey barely took in the dark, mossy stained panels of the house before her. She lost count how many times they had moved, uprooting their lives whenever they couldn’t afford the rent or when Plutt stepped on too many toes.

Briefly tapping the dirt from her shoes before entering the house, Rey immediately made her way to the room where Plutt spent most of his time. The large, bloated man looked down his squashed nose with squinty eyes, which narrowed at her entrance.

“What have you got for me, girl?” The stench of his breath wafted over her. If she was any younger and naive, she would have gagged, which would result in another beating. But now she was far too experienced to let him see how he got under her skin.

Keeping her eyes firmly locked on his, Rey pulled out the bag of coins and tossed it onto the low table separating the two. “’Ere, it’s more than wha’ I got ya last week.”

He leaned over, his leather chair creaking under his weight, and counted the coins that seamlessly tumbled from the high-quality satin pouch. “Were you _caught_?”

Rey waved her hand dismissively. “Nothin’ I dun handle.” She jumped when the ham-fisted hand smashed on the table.

“Do not lie to me!” Plutt rose from his seat and moved towards her until he was inches from her. “Don’t make me regret allowing you to be a petty _thief_ rather than the rest of your kind. I’ve been told that they saw your face.”

Silence stretched between them so it was impossible not to near the muffled moans from the nearby room. The threat was all too clear. Rey nodded, eyes lowered to the floor and shoulders slumped in defeat. “I din have mah goggles on bu’ it’s fine. They won’t know I work for ya.”

“For that lie, you will only get one _quarter_ portion.”

Rey’s eyes widened. “But-!”

“But _what_ , Rey? Argue with me and I can take away all your portions for the week! Now get out before I change my mind.”

Biting her tongue, she turned on her heel and left the room. She kept her head down, loose tendrils that slipped out of her buns obscuring her face and the hatred that burned in her eyes. Passing the room where the noises originated from only worsened her mood.

For the large amount of people occupying the house, there was an insultingly small amount of rooms in the house. There were only three bedrooms; one for Plutt himself, another for the women to sleep and ‘prepare for work’ and the last to conduct their ‘business’ in. The remaining members of the gang, mostly comprising of children and teenage boys, stayed in the large joint living and dining room. When the older girls weren’t entertaining clients, they either remained in their room or joined the others in the living room. It got cramped sometimes but it was better than entering any of the upstairs rooms.

As she reached the top of the stairs, Rey looked down and saw red. Propped against the wall with an ugly smirk on his face was Teedo; his scarf hung around his neck while he kept his black goggles over his eyes. “You!” Flying down the stairs, Rey was able to get one good punch to his face before she was restrained.

“Rey!” She froze in her struggles at the loud, booming voice. “Your portions are rescinded for this evening!”

Once Plutt disappeared back into his room, Rey ripped her arms free and stabbed her finger into Teedo’s chest. “Ye best wotch yeself.”

“Ah, ah, ah!” Grinning, Teedo tutted and waved his finger before her. “Don’t wanna anger Plutt more than ye have, eh?”

With one final shove, Rey moved past him and dropped down in her corner of the living room, looking around and seeing only a few children around. Most of the boys who were old enough were still out pickpocketing, so only children remained in the household. They were divided into different groups to maintain the household and to prepare meals for the rest of the gang. Rey rolled her eyes at how Plutt had explained it to her when she first arrived.

_‘I’m doing you a favour by giving you a roof to sleep under. The least you could do is cook and clean for your older comrades who can actually earn their keep.’_

Except Rey didn’t believe earning her keep meant getting beaten around when their boss was in one of his moods, having her food docked when she didn’t behave the way he wanted, or conforming to what he believed was good for her. She was lucky that she was able to convince Plutt to send her out as a pickpocket rather than a whore. She’d reasoned that since she was mistaken for a boy, it wasn’t worth waiting a few more years to be like the older girls. She thanked the stars for her observation skills and her thin frame, allowing her to slip into places undetected, making her the best scavenger Plutt could ever have.

Rey caught a glimpse of her reflection in the mirror down the hall.. When she was nine, she kept her hair hidden and frequently passed as a scrawny boy, with dirt always smudged on her face; but now nineteen, she had matured into something that could be considered desirable. She only wore dirty rags that distracted from her form, along with the chest band that held her small breasts in place, but her eyes and cheekbones gave her away. Plutt must have recently noticed that and regretted his decision to train her to be a pickpocket, perhaps why he became so furious with her, dealing out harsher punishments than necessary. Getting played by a child would not sit well with him.

Lying back on her frumpy pillow, she sighed. She had to work even harder than the others. She had to bring in more credits than the others. She was positive if she wasn’t valuable as a pickpocket, Plutt would have forced her to open her legs by now.  

At the sound of the front door opening, Rey turned and greeted one of the younger boys who had recently started pickpocketing. He was considered the runt of the pack, being the smallest of all the thieves, but Rey knew that size wasn’t always a disadvantage. The boy, BB, kicked his shoes off and eagerly sat down next to her.

“Argh!” he said, exasperated, “I thought for sure I would have beaten you today!”

Rey chuckled and ruffled his orange hair. BB recently joined their gang after running away from an orphanage, so his refined speech was jarring to hear sometimes. It had been years since she spoke like that; Plutt beat it out of her as a child. But despite BB’s smooth speech, the squashed face leader didn’t bother lifting a hand to correct it; yet another example of Plutt’s harshness towards her. “Ya gonna ‘ave ta try a lot harder if ya wan’ ta steal faster than me.”

BB pouted as Rey ruffled his hair. “Do you think you’ll leave, like the rest of them?”

There was a reason why the majority of Plutt’s gang were children or young adults. Boys who outgrew the pack decided not to hand over their findings when they could keep it for themselves and left. The same went for the older girls – they would leave to try their luck at finding more respectable jobs. Teedo was one of the few that remained that was older than Rey.

Regardless of their reason to leave, Plutt made it clear that once they left, they were not welcome to return.

Chewing her lip, Rey shook her head. “Who knows, BB. Besides, if I leave, who would help ya with your chores and give ya pickpocketin’ tips?”

“Gah, that reminds me! I better report to Plutt!” Without a second glance, BB quickly got up and went to look for their boss.

Left alone again, Rey laid her head back onto her pillow and turned towards the ugly discoloured wallpaper that peeled at the edges. “I won’t abandon you like ‘e did,” she whispered, mind drifting back to Finn. Scooting closer to the wall, Rey pressed her thumbnail into the weathered paper, rubbing up and down gently until a faded line appeared. Day after day, line after line, she would scratch into the wall and keep track of how long she was with Plutt, even though it didn’t matter. Each time they moved locations, she would have to start again. As a child, she hated seeing the stark, blank wall staring back at her, so as a distraction, she started recording each day that passed.

Running her fingertips gently over the numerous scratches etched on the wall, she thought back to what BB had asked before he left. Would she ever have the courage to leave the closest thing she had to a family?

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so after two updates only, the idea of sticking to an update schedule or even posting every day is tiring to me so here's the rest of the fic hahaha bye
> 
> ~~and my laptop crashed so I have upload everything at work so it's easier if I just do it all now~~

_It is never too late to be what you might have been. –George Eliot_

 

Chapter Two

 

Stepping onto the dingy streets of Corellia’s slums, Rey stretched her arms above her head, hearing the bones in her back crack as she warmed her body for the day ahead. The sun was almost at its highest point in the sky and most of the other boys had already taken off, going in different directions towards their personal territory. Rey secured a scarf around her mouth and side-glanced at Teedo who just stepped out into the thick polluted air. He adjusted his own goggles and scarf before tilting his head in question towards her.

“‘Ow generous of ya to wait for me, _girl_.”

Rey narrowed her eyes. “Ye best make sure ya don’t pull dat trick wit’ me again, ya hear?” Her voice was muffled from the scratchy fabric secured around her head, but the threat was still clear.

Teedo tilted his head to the other side. “Whatever do ya mean?” he asked mockingly.

“Ye know _exactly_ wot I mean.” Without another glance spared, Rey pushed past the smaller man, bumping shoulders aggressively before starting a light jog towards her hole in the wall.

Moving through the streets along her usual route was like second nature for her. Every scavenger had their preferred route and areas from which to poach. Some preferred the safety of their own district while others were more brazen and ventured into the middle district. The loot from the lowest district could never compare to the sheer amount of credits the middle district yielded, but not everyone had the means to advance past the wall. Rey had her hole in the wall while Teedo had a stolen district pass, putting them on equal footing.

Despite the district pass and their tricks, neither ever thought of breaching the upper district. It was already risky to move through the middle district, so stepping foot in the pristine streets of the richest district would result in any scavenger sticking out like a sore thumb. No one had the credits or time to look the part to infiltrate an upper district home, and just in case anyone entertained the idea of stealing from the richest of the rich, Plutt had made the first thing he taught any newcomer: steal or even set foot in the highest district and they would be thrown out, tossed on the streets with nothing but the clothes on their backs. The second rule was that if anyone got caught by the Corellian Security Force, then they would be left to die. They were the only two rules, but they were harsh ones.

Moving the vines back into place, Rey started on her favourite pickpocketing spots in the middle district. By the time evening set in, she had a sizeable amount of credits in her bag. Feeling pleased with herself, Rey spied a lady whose purse was hanging a bit _too_ loosely from her arm. With her final target in sight, Rey kept her eyes trained on the lady from where she sat on the rooftops. She trailed the lady to a more secluded part of the district before making her way to the ground. However, she did not expect a strong hand to grasp the collar of her clothes and pull her into a darkened area.

Rey struggled, eyes darting around wildly as she tried to wriggle out of the person’s hold. She froze when she felt a knife pressed against her neck, the blade digging slightly into her skin.

“Move and I’ll slice your throat,” a man breathed in her ear.

Remaining still, she heard a chuckle before the weight hanging off her belt disappeared. “Hey-!”

“Ah, ah, ah! One more peep and you’re dead. Good. Now I’ve been watching you for some time. Needless to say, I’m impressed. The way you steal from people so they’re none the wiser is _exactly_ what I need. And I know that no scavenger works for themselves. No, you all have gang leaders to report to and I can tell that he would be quite displeased with you if return empty handed. So if you cooperate with me, I’ll give you back your credits and you can be on your merry way, deal?”

Not seeing any other way out of her situation, Rey nodded, careful not to move too much and cut herself on his knife. “Wot ye want of me?” Rey asked, rubbing her neck when he released her. Now that she could see him, she had to stop herself from taking a step back. The man was tall with a slim face and a pressed purple three piece suit hanging off his lanky body, but it wasn’t what he was wearing that made Rey want to run. No, it was the look that shone in his eyes - one of pure hatred.

“It’s simple. I need you to retrieve something for me from someone’s house. They’re not home at this time, so it should be a breeze.”

Rey kept an eye on the knife still tightly held in his hand. “In an’ out, ye?”

“In and out,” the purple man repeated. “But I’m going to have to take those goggles and scarf from you. Where we’re going, they’ll only raise eyebrows and we don’t need any attention drawn towards us.”

Unwilling to let go of her belongings, and despite the sinking feeling forming in the base of her throat, Rey asked, “Where are you taking me?”

A painfully large grin formed on the man’s face. “The upper district, of course. They won’t let a blatant street rat in, but if you lose the goggles and scarf and stick with me, I can pass you off as with me.” He lifted his knife towards her threateningly, his other hand outstretched and waiting. “Are you ready?”

With the sun starting to set, Rey knew she wouldn’t be able to steal enough credits with the time she had left. The beating she would receive from Plutt would be one of the worst, especially after how tense things were between them. The maniacal man before her only pushed her in the right direction.

Taking off the goggles and scarf that hung from her neck, Rey dropped her items into the man’s hand with a sigh. “Let’s get dis over wit’.” The sooner she completed the job, the less time she would spend in the upper district and less chance Plutt would find out.

With his knife hidden from view but not from Rey’s mind, the pair started towards the district border Rey had never seen. Stopping before two guards in dark grey uniforms, the purple man held up his district pass. As one of the guards took the pass, Rey shuffled her weight between her feet under the other guard’s scrutiny.

“What’s her business here?” The guard watching Rey asked.

“She’s my new maid.”

The guard examining the district pass glanced up. “A bit unorthodox, don’t you think? Not scared of what others will say?”

“Where I decide to source my employees is no business of yours. I also don't remember asking for your opinion.”

“Of course, sir. Welcome to the upper district.” With a snap, the guard handed the pass back to the purple man and allowed them passage.

Once out of hearing range, Rey mumbled to the man next to her. “So, wot? Ye a rich nabob from ‘ere? Can’t ya hire someone to do dis?”

“It’s much safer to get someone with no upper quadrant affiliation to do what I’m asking you.” Rey rolled her eyes. ‘Asking her’, as he put it, was a liberal way to describe threatening her.

Looking around, Rey took note of how incredibly clean the district was. There was a significant difference in the upper district that set it apart from the others. Whilst the lowest relied on loud and heavy machinery, and the middle not as much, the highest district had no pollution or the constant din of engines that was second nature to Rey. Walking in the upper district, she felt a difference in air quality, her lungs deeply breathing and not making her cough uncontrollably.

“Everyone in this area is still at work, so there’s no one around. If you’re as fast as I’ve seen you, you should be finished before anyone returns,” the man explained, stopping in an alleyway and tilting his head towards the house across the road. “That one there is the one I need you to break into. I need you to steal documents for me, any sort of information about the owner, Ben Solo. He doesn’t have many servants, but they are home, so you have to get in without tipping them off. His office and the master bedroom are on the second floor, but I doubt he would keep anything notable in his office. Aim for his bedroom. Now, go!” He pushed Rey out of the shadows and remained hidden.

With one last glare at his rough handling, Rey dashed across the empty street and ducked into the dark alleyway next to her target’s house. She bit her lip nervously and looked up at the windows on the second floor. Instead of scaling the wall to get to one of the windows above, Rey found a trapdoor to the side of the house and tried to pry the locks open. It didn’t budge. Gritting her teeth, she put her hands on her hips and stared up at an open window meters above.

Swinging her arms to limber up, Rey rubbed her hand along the surface before her. Sure, she had climbed the walls of Corellia, but it didn’t prepare her for the smooth surface or the absence of bricks on this side of the house. Seeing a brass drain pipe on the side, Rey tested its sturdiness before hoisting herself off the ground. As she climbed up the thick pipe, she used her boots to get a solid footing, the rubber soles giving her enough friction to scale the house. Reaching the open window, Rey jumped and grabbed the ledge with the tips of her fingers.

She exhaled slowly and started to swing her legs to gain momentum. She lifted herself up and over, through the window and onto the carpeted floors with a soft thump. Rey looked around frantically and was relieved to see the hallway was empty. She toed off her shoes to reveal the same pair of socks she had worn when she stole from the man in the bar. She always had them on, never knowing when she had to move undetected within bars and restaurants. The socks were a special pair, modified when she realised it was hard to move quickly with her large boots. They had  leather reinforced soles that she had sewed in from an old jacket she found in the dumpster.

She neatly tucked her boots behind the potted plant by the window and took a deep breath. Now that she was somewhat prepared, she quietly slid over the soft carpet, making not a sound as she quickly peeked into each room along the corridor.

When she got to the last room and came up empty, sweat started to bead at the back of her neck. This was taking a lot longer than she anticipated. If she didn’t get back to Plutt soon, Rey knew it wasn’t going to be good for her. She had already found the office the purple man mentioned but ignored it at his request.

The end of the corridor led to a landing that extended in a semi-circle, overlooking the foyer below. Along the landing was a stairwell that led downstairs and a door at the very end of the hallway. Hoping that the bedroom was behind that door, she quickly slid along the carpet towards the other end.

As she quietly crept across the stretch of carpet, curiosity got the better of her. She peeked over the banister and saw that the foyer below extended under the second floor, probably leading to the dining room and lounge. The bottom of the stairs led to a set of double doors and to the left of it, judging from the aroma that was wafting through the house, the kitchen. When she saw a shadow move through the light that fell through the kitchen doorway, Rey jumped back into the darkness, paranoid that whoever was down there would see her. Finding it was best not to dawdle, even though it _was_ her first time in such an extravagant house, she quickly made her way to the end of the corridor and ducked into the room.

The sun had already set in the upper district, shrouding the room in darkness. Thankfully, the moonlight streaming through the window was enough for Rey to work. She wondered briefly who Ben Solo was and what he did that made the purple man’s eyes shine with such malice. It didn’t seem like the purple man knew much about Ben Solo if he was getting Rey to break into his house for information.

Now that she was standing in his bedroom, the first thing Rey noticed was that this man, whoever he was, kept very little in his possession, despite having _all this space_ to fill. Besides the large four-poster king bed in the centre, there was a large wardrobe to the side. Pulling open the double doors, Rey started to rummage through his clothes. There were many suits, thick coats, pressed pants with matching shirts, suspenders and ties all neatly folded and hung on their respectable hangers. Along the bottom of the wardrobe were pairs of shoes; some white and some black and shined until they gleamed, but nothing of importance.

Spying a table next to the bed, Rey opened the single drawer and was extremely disheartened to see it only contained a few notebooks, pens and letters. She flicked through the books, eyes skimming the words but picking up nothing of importance. Ben Solo’s writing was atrocious but Rey could just make out schedules and random scribbles from his squiggly lines.

Just as she entertained the thought of returning to the office she saw earlier, a letter half sticking out of an envelope caught her eye, her hands opening it in hopes that maybe this was the piece she needed. Rey read over the small card, her fingers absentmindedly caressing the thick cardstock, the letter it came with still half-folded in her other hand.

_ The Coruscant Society is pleased to host its 75 _ _ th _ _ gala _

_The company of Ben Solo is requested at the manor of Chancellor Dooku, on behalf of The Coruscant Society._

_Enclosed are further details._

Rey rolled her eyes. She never understood the appeal of dressing up and attending such events. From what she saw in the middle district and the officers of the Corellian Security Force, she wouldn’t be surprised if such galas and events were an excuse for rich people to gossip about others.

Before moving on to read the rest of the letter, something in the drawer caught her attention. Reaching down, Rey caught the corner of something glossy poking out of one of the notebooks and pulled. It was an old photograph, judging by the faded and weathered edges. Tilting the photo towards the moonlight, Rey could make out a small child with curly hair and large ears, smiling widely with three adults behind him – two males and a female. It was evident that one of the males and the female were the boy’s parents while the remaining male was a…friend? Relative? It was hard to tell. The boy himself seemed familiar to Rey, but she couldn’t put her finger on the nagging familiarity at the back of her mind. However, now was not the time for her to ponder where she had seen him. The last thing she wanted to find out was that she had already robbed this poor bastard.

Biting her lip, Rey wondered if this was what the purple man wanted. Deciding quickly, she started to gather the notebooks, tucking the photograph back into the book it came from, dropping the invitation card and letter back into the drawer in the process. An invitation was nothing compared to something personal like photographs and personal writings.

As she lifted her arm to tuck the small notebook within her layers of clothing, the sound of the door opening made her falter. Suddenly, light bathed the room and Rey gasped at the sudden brightness, eyes squinted as she willed for them to adjust faster. Whilst she was floundering to regain her sight, a deep voice made her swivel towards the doorway.

“Who are you?”

Blinking rapidly, Rey wanted to shriek at the sheer size of the male that blocked her exit. As her eyes adjusted and her vision was restored, the blur of a man cleared to reveal an older version of the boy in the photo – ears, hair, nose and all. She should have known that the owner of this house would be of his stature, the large coats in the wardrobe were a dead giveaway. Nevertheless, Rey’s eyes darted towards the window on the wall furthest from the door. If she was fast enough, she could escape through the window. As she weighed the chances of her jumping out of the window unscathed, his next words made her freeze instead.

“It’s you.”

 


	4. Chapter 4

_If the wind will not serve, take to the oars. –Latin Proverb_

 

Chapter Three

 

“It’s you.”

The words made Rey turn around and look at the man incredulously. Kriff, maybe she had robbed him before. She never really stuck around after pickpocketing someone to memorise their face, but she guessed it was entirely possible for them to remember hers.

Her eyes darted wildly, not sure what to do since the man - Ben Solo, she guessed - could identify her. Backing away from him, Rey inched towards the window, quickly securing the notebook down her shirt. She whipped around and frantically pulled the window up only to find it refused to budge.

Rey cursed under her breath and turned back around, body pressed against the window. Despite her panicked state, Ben watched  her with cool regard from the doorway. He pushed himself off the doorframe and slowly made his way towards her. “What did you take?”

“I…I…” In all her years as a pickpocket, Rey had never been caught in the act; not by the security force _or_ the sorry saps she had robbed, so this was all new ground for her.

Rey took her chances and scurried around the room, in hopes that she would be able to sneak by him. However, the moment she started moving along the perimeter of the room, Ben took a step towards her, his imposing body making her falter in her movements. He terrified her.

She let out a small squeak and squared her shoulders. She didn’t spend her whole life on the streets, fighting tooth and nail against every male’s expectation for her, just to be frightened by some nobleman. She held her arms up in front of her, fists clenched, at the ready to take on the looming giant of a man.

Ben looked at her, amused, and reached out, in hopes to calm her down. “Now, look here-”

Before he could finish what he was trying to say, Rey attacked. She slapped his outstretched hands from her and delivered a sidekick to his stomach. Ben stumbled back, mostly in shock at her unexpected power and determination. He had underestimated her.

Charging forward, he grabbed both of Rey’s arms firmly, holding her still as she struggled. Her heart beat rapidly in her chest and adrenaline kicked in. She gritted her teeth and swung her forehead into him, smiling in satisfaction when she heard his teeth clack together. Quickly, while he was disoriented, she looped her arms up and over his hold, easily slipping away. With her body slightly squatted, she gave a roundhouse kick to his side, before dropping low and swiping him from off his feet.

Ben fell down with a cry and grabbed blindly at the pair of feet running past him, his confidence melting away. Rey gave a yelp when his large hand wrapped around her slim ankle, and went crashing to the floor. She turned to her side and kept kicking at the hand that was still holding her ankle. It was unfortunate that she only had her slippers on and not actual boots, because she knew it would take a lot longer for him to let go. But fortunately, a few well aimed blows at his wrist and Ben let go, instinctively bringing his hand close to cradle his injury.

Not bothering to see if he was getting up again, Rey made a beeline for the corridor. Her aim was to get out the same way she came in. She had jumped from buildings to buildings before, so dropping from the second floor window should be a piece of cake. What she didn’t expect was a slim, orange haired butler to just step onto the landing from the stairs, eyes widened at the sight of a feral girl charging at him, or the sight of his employer on the floor behind her.

Before Rey could sneak past him, the butler caught a hold of her arm and yanked her back. She bumped into him and immediately, a pair of arms were secured around her stomach. Her legs flailed wildly as she grunted, hoping that her foot would connect with _something._ When she felt the wall brush against her toes, she swung with her whole body towards the wall and kicked off with all her strength.

The butler let out a startled noise and lost his balance. He stumbled backwards until his back collided with the banister that lined the landing. Seeing her window of opportunity, Rey smashed the back of her head against his face, ignoring the audible crunch of his nose breaking, and escaped from his clutches.

By this time, Ben had staggered to his feet and was leaning on his doorframe in pain. Not wanting to stick around, Rey sprinted down the hall to the window she had snuck in and dived through. She kept a firm grip on the windowsill and swung around so she was crouched against the smooth wall. Building some momentum in her body, she swung down like an animal and braced herself with her hands, tumbling into a ball against the ground.

Jumping up to her feet, Rey ran as fast as she could along the alleyway towards where she knew the purple man was waiting for her. As she ran out of the alleyway, she saw the front door be wrenched open to her left and Ben Solo shout after her angrily.

“Get back here, girl!”

The jump to the ground winded her slightly but she persevered through the pain to get to the other side of the road. She saw the faint outline of the purple man lurking in the shadows and ran directly for him. As she darted across the road, she noticed that there were a few people milling about, most likely returning home from work. Wanting to get out of the public eye, Rey pushed herself to get to the alleyway faster but as she neared the other side, she saw the purple man sprint from the alley, pushing past the odd person on the sidewalk and around the corner without sparing a glance.

As the purple man disappeared from view, Rey slowed her pace down to a slow jog then to a complete stop. She turned around and saw Ben stand on his porch steps, watching her and the escaping purple man with his dark eyes. He didn’t chase her. He merely watched her from across the road, the light from the lampposts illuminating her clearly.

Still watching him, Rey started to walk backwards, not trusting herself to break eye contact with him. As if the moment she looked away, he would appear right in front of her and she would be trapped. She kept walking backwards until she was completely shrouded in darkness and out of his sight.

Not wanting to linger in the upper district, Rey looked around frantically for a way to the rooftops. No matter where she looked, she only saw smooth walls with no ledges or jutting ridges for her to jump onto. Resigning to the brass storm drain pipe that was present on every building, she started her painful ascent. Climbing the metallic surface was infinitely harder without her boots, Rey belatedly realising they were behind the potted plant. At the third failed attempt, Rey ripped her socks off and wedged them between her teeth. Her hands and feet were clammy so she hoped it would be enough grip to get to the first rooftop.

After much grunting, Rey successfully rolled over onto the flat rooftop and spat the socks from her mouth. As she laid on her back, gasping for air from the exertion, her eyes fell open and the sight before her caused her to gasp. Since there was no thick smog or pollution in the upper district, the night sky was a clear deep blue without a trace of haze present. Throughout the night sky was an array of sparkles flickering back at her. She only read about the stars in books but never saw it for herself. The beauty of the night sky and the silence of the upper district calmed her nerves, the tremors in her body subsiding along with her panic.

Now that her mind was focused again, Rey looked out into the distance to try and find her way back home. She spotted the wall and looked around the rooftop for something that could propel her to the next building. She found a long pole lying on the ground, some sections of the pole were wrapped in metal with rivets drilled into the sides. Testing its weight in her hand, she decided it should handle her weight and strain enough to get her to the middle district.

Shoving her socks into her back pocket, she gripped the pole in her palms and gave a run up, the bottom of the stick hitting the corner of the roof and propelling her over to the next building. She landed on her side on the next rooftop, stick still firmly grasped in her hand. She breathed a sigh of relief. Her plan could work.

Over and over again, she vaulted over alleyways, tumbling onto rooftops until she reached the edge of the border. Placing the pole on the ground, Rey stood against the ledge and looked over the wall, seeing a building on the other side with lots of window sills. She didn’t know how long she was missing, but she knew that her absence would not go unnoticed by Plutt. At that time of night, it was close to impossible to steal enough credits to make up for her lack of presence. Not wanting to waste more time finding another route back into the middle district, Rey picked up the stick and gave her last run up.

The gap was too large, she knew that, but as she soared across the expanse, Rey let go on the pole and reached to grab onto one of the many window sills. Her fingers caught the edge of the window but slipped from her fingertips. She gave a sharp cry, blindly grabbing for anything that could stop her descent. Thankfully,her fingers grazed enough bricks for her to land in a pile of limbs on the dirt.

Rey looked around wildly. Knowing she was louder than she anticipated, Rey awkwardly got up, side bruised, and started to stumble in the general direction where her hole was. Sticking to dark alleys and empty streets, Rey finally reached the thick patch of vines without any trouble.

After tonight’s ordeal, Rey seriously considered joining the groups the boys went out in when pickpocketing. It was rather smart of them; they would use their combined efforts to distract certain people while the others robbed them blind. Rey would have joined them a long time ago, if they didn’t avoid her constantly. She would even come to a mutual agreement with Teedo if it meant that she wouldn’t have to be subjected to this ever again. It didn’t help that Plutt’s recent dislike of her made everyone wary to associate with her, paranoid that Plutt’s harsh treatment would transfer onto them if they were seen with Rey too much.

The only boy that seemed impervious to everyone’s wagging tongues was BB. Then again, he was still young and hadn’t experienced the brunt of Plutt’s anger yet.

Plutt. What was she going to do? Her flimsy excuse that she conjured up was thin, at best. Maybe if Plutt was in a good mood, he would play into her story and let her off with a light beating. However, if he was in a foul mood...Rey shivered. She already had nothing to show for, the purple man running off with her credits, so she already knew she would be getting a firm beating tonight.

After navigating her way back home, she could only guess how late it was. She expected everyone to be asleep but was surprised when numerous pairs of eyes swivelled to her when she crossed the threshold. All the lights were on in the house and everyone stopped their conversations to stare at Rey. She looked at them in confusion as some of the younger children spoke to each other in hushed whispers.

Before she could ask what was wrong, she felt the heavy footsteps of Unkar Plutt vibrate throughout the house. Rey watched as the large man lumbered down the rickety stairwell before stopping in front of her, Teedo not far behind him.

“Plutt, I can expla-”

The back of Plutt’s large flabby hand swung across her face with a resounding slap, making her head snap to the side. She tasted the coppery tang of blood and spat the red saliva that dripped from her lip before wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. “Wot do ya think you’re doin’?!”

“I could ask you that same thing! Teedo saw you follow a man - a **nobleman** \- into the upper district! Were you going to hide it? DID YOU THINK I WOULDN’T KNOW?” thundered Plutt. His loud booming voice made everyone cower in fear, Rey included.

She gathering to small amount of courage she had left and tried to calm the large man. “Plutt, if ye can jus’ lemme explain-”

“Get out.”

Rey stopped her pleading and looked up at the man with wide eyes. “Wot?”

“You heard me. Get out and don’t come back. You’re no longer welcome here. You know the rules,” Plutt sneered, looking over his large nose with disgust.

“But…but…” Rey didn’t care that she was sputtering like a goldfish, her mind was reeling at the idea of being thrown out.

“But _what_ , girl? You hold yourself too high if you think I’m willing to keep you around after tonight. Where’s your credits, hmm? How do I know you’re not working for them? No, I have no use for little girls who play dress-ups as boys and don’t follow orders. Now, get out before I throw you out.”

Rey stared at Plutt with wide eyes. Fourteen years. She had been with them for fourteen years, and just like that Plutt was willing to toss her out without letting her explain herself? The room around her started to close in on her, becoming too small for her liking – like it was suffocating her. She whirled her head around and flinched at everyone’s stares, their eyes boring into her. Even BB stared at her with disbelief. Logically, she knew that they were shocked just as she was, but in her panicked state, the attention was too much.

So she ran.

 


	5. Chapter 5

_Fall seven times and stand up eight. –Japanese Proverb_

 

Chapter Four

 

After a restless night of shivering in the cold, dirty streets, Rey was determined to find the purple man when the sun rose. The shock of spending the night on the streets subsided within the first minutes of Rey finding shelter inside an old box. After that, anger settled in its place. Anger at Plutt, anger at Teedo, and anger at the purple man. Even if she could sleep in the bitter cold, the fury that coursed through her veins kept her awake. As the night ticked on, Rey formulated a plan to find the purple man and compensate for all the trouble he had caused.

As Rey crawled through the wall, she realised she wasn’t sure where to start looking for the purple man. Aimlessly walking around, Rey breathed in the air comfortably. The smog in the lower district seemed to have eased over night, allowing her to survive the night without her throat burning or closing from the pollution, but the air quality in the middle district was always going to be better regardless.

She was tired from running the day before and from her uncomfortable sleeping conditions. Coupled with sheer exhaustion, Rey couldn't bring herself to climb onto any rooftops to get an aerial view of the middle district. Without her goggles and scarf, she hoped she blended in with the citizens enough to not rouse suspicion. She was careful to not bump into anyone, weaving her way through the crowds to remain inconspicuous as possible.

Rey had managed to steal an apple and some bread in the morning before crossing the border. Despite her small meal, the smell of succulent meats from a nearby bar made her stomach grumble and her feet to venture towards the tantalizing fragrance. Nearing the source, Rey slowed down when she realised where she was, but it was too late.

“YOU!”

Seeing the bartender who angrily chased her through the streets made the hair on the back of her neck stand. Just as she spun around to sprint in the opposite direction, she collided into a large chest, making her fall onto her behind. Fear struck Rey when she looked up, taking in the white uniform of the Corellian Security Force. Cursing to herself, she tried to scramble to her feet but was pulled up by a tight hand wrapping around her arm.

“Officers! This _girl_ -” the bartender spat. “-is a thief! She stole from my customers and because of that, my business has plummeted! Arrest her and get her out of my sight!”

Before she could conjure an excuse, her body was pushed towards the two guards and a set of heavy shackles were clapped around her wrist. “Wot?!”

One of the guards kept a hand on her shoulder, fingers painfully digging into her skin as he directed her where to walk, warning her against trying to escape. “How did you get in this district?”

Rey kept her mouth shut, lips firmly pressed together. The other officer sighed tiredly and turned to his partner. “It’s too early for this, Devi.”

“Shut it, Shrunk. If we lock her up now, we don’t have to do anything for the rest of the day,” the first officer said, hand still pushing her towards a building at the end of the road.

When they arrived at a building Rey assumed was their office, the officer behind her pushed her up the stairs impatiently. “Move,” Devi said.

Glaring at the officers, Rey followed their instructions and was led down a hallway. Once she was locked in a cell with black iron bars, the pair stood on the other side and started to question her.

“I’ll ask you one more time. How did you get into the middle district?”

As she remained silent, she watched in amusement as the officers got frustrated at her lack of cooperation.

“We know you snuck in. You may not have goggles or that ridiculous scarf but no one in the middle ring is as dirty as you. And there’s no way you could afford a district pass, so there’s no point in lying about that.”

Rey remained silent. Eventually, the two officers left when it became apparent that she wasn’t going to give any useful information, much less say anything. Once she was left alone, Rey sighed and sank to the floor. She propped her back against the wall and revised over her plans for the future.

Corellia was big, with each district containing more people than she could fathom. Rey laughed lightly and held her head in her hands. How naive of her to think she could find the purple man amongst the sea of people. She didn’t even know from which district he was; she hoped to find him in the middle district since it was where he found her. Even though she kept telling herself that, she knew it would be harder to sneak into the upper district to look for him there. If she was caught in the middle district whilst blending in, Rey would stick out like a sore thumb in the upper district.

She hated giving up, but now that she wasn’t consumed by hatred towards the people responsible for her current circumstances, or shivering in the cold of the night, Rey was able to think a bit more clearly. It was wishful thinking for her to find the purple man. Instead of expending all her energy at finding a ghost, she should concentrate her efforts on surviving. She had to do what she knew best - scavenging.

Rey jumped onto her feet with renewed energy and approached the bars that confined her. Crouching, she examined the padlock that held the bolt in place. With nothing but her bare hands, there was no way she would be able to break out without some help.

She looped her arms through the bars and slumped against her cell. “‘Ey! Ye guards! ‘Am ready to talk!” She added a high pitched whistle for good measure.

Within moments, one of the officers - Shrunk, if Rey remembered correctly - came lumbering towards her cell. “Finally! Ready to tell-”

The moment Shrunk was close enough, Rey’s hand shot out and grabbed the man, pulling him close. Taken off guard, Shrunk let out a small cry of shock before he slammed into the bars and slumped on the floor, unconscious. Dropping to her knees, Rey quickly grabbed the keys from his belt and unlocked the door. Shrunk’s partner was bound to investigate the noise and Rey wanted to be free from her cell when the time came.

She didn’t have to wait long before Devi came across his unconscious partner. “Shrunk!”

Rey didn’t give Devi a chance to realise that the cell door was open. She jumped and grabbed the horizontal bars near the ceiling, rocketing her body forward with her legs in front. Her feet connected with Devi’s jaw, the man’s head snapping to the side. He stumbled, falling backwards at the unexpected sight of the small girl attacking him. The shock that was plastered across his face allowed Rey to deliver her final blow.

With two unmoving bodies at her feet, Rey had to escape the office before anyone else came. Just as she jumped over the pair, heavy bags of credits caught her eye. Without a second thought, Rey swiped the two bags and darted from the security office. Thankfully, it seemed that they were the only two on duty in that area of the middle district.

Some time had passed since she last ate, and fighting the guards did not help. But with her pockets heavier, Rey guessed she could afford a decent meal and actually spend credits on herself for once. She put as much distance from the security office as she could before looking for a place to spend her credits.

She came across a small restaurant that didn’t look too busy. There were a few customers sitting far inside who wouldn’t notice her approach. Not sure how to go about ordering food, Rey shuffled from foot to foot, hovering near the entrance and waiting for some sort of clue as to what she was meant to do. A small middle aged man with greying hair came bustling towards her, his lips curled into a sneer at the sight of Rey. “Get out.”

Rey looked at her in shock. “Bu’ I got credits!” She quickly reached into her pockets to retrieve some coins as proof that she was genuine but the man shoved her back until Rey was standing on the footpath, hands still in her pockets.

“I don’t want your credits. I don’t want the likes of _you_ anywhere near my establishment! I don’t care even if you can pay!” he added the last part when Rey held out a handful of credits towards her. “Shoo! I don’t need _scum_ like you warding off my customers!”

With a final push, Rey ran back to familiar grounds, not stopping or pausing even as she bumped into numerous passing people. If no one would take her credits then what was she to do?

Crawling on her hands and feet back to the lower district, she walked aimlessly through her home streets with the weight of the credits in her pocket as a constant reminder for what she forgot. Even though she had credits, no one would serve her. They cared too much for appearances to even take her credits, forcing Rey to spend it in the lower district.

Resigning herself to eating food that was by no means fresh, Rey settled in the small niche she had decided would be home. Even though there was a few hours of sunlight left, it was best that she rested and regained her strength. It would be back to the standard routine she was used to.

Days passed and despite her successful swipes, her body was still weakening by the day. She tried to blame it on the food, but the amount of food she was ingesting was the most she’d had in months. A week passed before she realised what was happening.

The smog.

The first nights she spent on the streets had minimal to zero smog. There must have been a lull in the workers in the beginning of the week, causing the machinery to slow to a stop. Enough days would have passed to recruit more workers, the engines and machines working around the clock and producing more haze to permeate the lower district. This made surviving the nights even more unbearable. She had bought another set of goggles and a scarf, but they didn’t compare to having actual shelter from the fumes.

She knew she couldn’t take more of this. There was no point in returning to Plutt to beg for forgiveness. She knew she would never be allowed back, so there was no need to throw away her dignity. At the rate of how her body was reacting to the pollution, she was surprised she was still able to steal some credits. She didn’t want to acknowledge it but she noticed she was getting sloppier. She had to get out. She refused to die on the streets, to lie down and wait for her death. No, there was another option.

Rey pulled out the small notebook that was still safely tucked in her shirt. Flipping open the book, she stopped at the page where the old photo was wedged against the fold of the spine. Rey analysed the boy she assumed to be Ben Solo. She was sure it was him; the big ears, black hair and prominent nose was uncanny. She chuckled at how small he looked with the three adults looming behind him. He wasn’t smiling, as if told by his mother to pose for the photograph, but Rey could tell he was loved, and that he was happy. There was a slight turn to the corners of his eyes that indicated so, along with the mirth that glinted in his eyes.

She would convince him to help her somehow, even if it was the last thing she did.

She had to.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shrunk and Devi are those two assholes who stole the ship from Rey in Before the Awakening :D ~~belatedly, I just realised Devi is a female _shit_~~


	6. Chapter 6

_Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage. –Anais Nin_

 

Chapter Five

 

Rey shifted her weight between her feet, stomach twisting and uncertainty creeping into her mind. When she had adamantly decided to confront Ben Solo, she was on the verge of breaking. Now at the crack of dawn and at his doorstep, she wasn’t so sure it was a good idea. She had lifted her hand to knock four times, pulling back at the last minute to pace on his porch.

When she initially crossed into the upper ring, there was barely any sunlight, so she was able to slip the barriers unnoticed. It also helped that the overnight guard was too excited to be clocking off to do his job properly. Now the soft light of dawn illuminated the empty streets. It wasn’t long before people started to mill about, running their morning errands. The longer she lingered on his doorstep, the riskier it became for her.

Quickly and without another thought spared, Rey clenched her fist firmly and banged on the door. She glanced sideways towards the road. She hadn’t seen anyone yet but desperation and paranoia made her bang on the door once more.

Just as she pulled back to hit the door even harder, the door swung open to reveal a disgruntled man – the same man with orange hair that she had the misfortune of struggling with. But this time there was a thick piece of bandage and tape covering his nose. At the sight of her, a sneer pulled on the man’s face. Just as he his mouth opened to let out a scathing comment, Rey’s fist accidentally smashed into his already broken nose.

“Argh!” The man dropped his head into his hands, clutching his nose in pain. “You little shit!” Rey gulped and ducked under the fist that came flying at her. “Get back here!”

The last thing she wanted was to cause a scene outside. Rey darted into the house and looked around hurriedly to find the owner. She kept moving away from the angry butler who slammed the door in rage and started to stalk after her.

With her head tilted up towards the stairs where she guessed Ben was, Rey held her hands up in defence. “Wait! I need ta talk ta Ben Solo!”

The ginger-haired man scoffed. “So you can steal more of his belongings? No, you best leave before I call the Security Force.”

The thought of having to deal with them again made her grimace.

Before she could decide what to do, the butler grabbed her wrist and pulled her roughly towards the exit. “Get out of here, you scum!”

“Ow! Leggo of me!” Rey yelled as she struggled against the painful hold. “I need ta talk ta Ben Solo for compensation!”

“Hux, release her. And Miss, compensation? For what, may I ask?”

The new voice made the butler, Hux, drop Rey’s arm and bow his head in respect. Rey turned around, bewildered, until her eyes fell on a tall man with thick dark hair leaning on the bannisters above. “You!”

Rey ran up the stairs, skipping every step until she was in front of the surprised man.  Ben watched in shock as Rey ran up the stairs, skipping every second step.

“’Cos of **you** , ye got me kicked outta mah gang!” Rey said as she jabbed her finger at him.

With a cocked brow, Ben gently pushed her finger from his face. “And _how_ did I do that, exactly?”

“Well, I was taken by some otha’ rich bloke who wanted me,” Rey paused for emphasis, hands splayed against her chest, “to steal from ya!”

Ben crossed his arms and looked at her darkly. “I don’t see how getting kicked out of your little street gang is my fault. You did what you were supposed to do. You stole something very precious from me. Isn’t stealing _all_ that you do?”

Rey tried not to look affronted but she couldn’t find the lie in what he was saying. “Y-Yeah, but if it wasn’ for ya then maybe tha’ purple man wouldn’t want ‘information’ on ya and I wouldn’t be sleepin’ on da streets!”

“It sounds like your problems lie with that purple man, not me.”

“Well, I tried findin’ ‘im,” Rey sighed. “Corellia is a big place. Last time I tried, I spen’ the day in a Security Force cell.” Ben’s brows disappeared into his hairline.

“I’m sorry to hear that. The Corellian Security Force are not the best, to say the least,” Ben said.

Rey looked at him in surprise. She had never heard anyone outside of the lower district have such opinions towards the Security Force. “Well,” Rey started, her hand delving into her clothes and pulling out the notebook she had swiped earlier. “Here. I dun need this. After all, ya did say it was precious to ya.” She thrusted the notebook roughly against his chest.

Ben slowly retracted the book from his chest and flipped it open, surprise evident on his face. The book automatically opened to the page where the photograph was wedged safely in its confines. He slid the old photograph from the centrefold and gazed at it with soft eyes. “Hux, please prepare some tea for our guest. This might take a while.”

“Yes, sir.”

As the butler wandered towards the kitchen, Ben quickly placed the photo back into the book and ushered Rey towards the hallway with many doors. “Please, just through here and we can talk compensation.”

Rey followed his instructions and found herself in a room lined with bookshelves and a table against the far wall. She vaguely heard the door click shut behind her and whirled around to see Ben striding across the room towards the desk. All of the sudden, she was intensely aware of how dangerous the situation was. For someone who she robbed, Ben was treating her suspiciously nicely.

“How much do you want?”

Rey jolted at the directness of his question. “Wot?”

Ben visibly cringed and tried to look at her patiently. “You mentioned compensation earlier. And you appear to be of desperate need for credits. So, how much do you want?”

She paused and quickly went over the possibilities of having enough credits to survive to leave the lower district for good. Thinking back to the blue suited man she had robbed weeks earlier, decided against it. “I dun want ya credits.”

“Oh? I assumed that’s what you came for. If that’s the case, I am at a loss of what else I could provide you.” Ben leaned back on his seat and waited for her reply.

“I was kicked outta ma gang. They were all I ‘ad. I can get credits. I still know how to scavenge. It’s jus’ that…”

Ben watched her, waiting for her to continue. “Yes?” he prompted.

“‘Ave ya ever been in the lower district? On a bad day?”

“What do you consider a ‘bad day’?”

Rey played with the ends of her shirt. “A bad day is when the smog stops ya breathin’. My goggles an’ scarf can only do so much, ‘specially if I dun ‘ave shelter.”

“So, you’re asking I find you a house?” Ben laughed at the idea.

“No! That’s too much! Nah, I was thinkin’ that I could work for ye instead?” The ends of her shirt were damp from her clammy hands. Before Ben could open his mouth, Rey moved forward and slammed her hands against the table desperately. “I ‘ave nowhere else to go!”

A knock to the door brought their conversation to a halt. With his head bent politely, Hux set a tray with a pot of tea, a set of teacups, and an assortment of cakes on the table. “Maz insisted,” he commented.

Ben nodded and thanked his butler. The door clicked shut once more and Ben set about pouring tea for both of them. “How do you take your tea?”

“Dunno, never ‘ad it.” Rey withdrew her hands from the table and watched Ben prepare the tea. She was mesmerized by his long fingers. They wrapped around the handle of the teapot as his other hand held down the lid before tilting the hot liquid from the white porcelain. She knew it was a simple act but he made it look like an art. “Please, lemme work for ya,” Rey whispered, scared that if she spoke too loud it would break the spell he seemed to have over her.  
  
“Your speech is atrocious. You don’t have any training in being a maid that I’m aware of, and how can I trust you when you robbed me?” He balanced the teacup on a saucer and proffered it to her.

Rey accepted the set, her fingers rubbing the smooth curve of the teacup with slight fascination. “I can speak Basic. It’s a little shaky and I might slip sometimes bu’ I jus’ need practice,” she explained as she took a sip.

Ben’s eyes flickered up and wrinkled at the corners as her face pulled at the bitter taste. “People usually add sugar and milk, depending on their taste.”

Wordlessly with her free hand, Rey delicately placed cubes of sugar into her teacup and added milk to the warm liquid. Slumping against a chair, she brought the cup to her lips. “If you’re worried I’ll steal from ya again, I won’t. I did it to survive but if you let me stay, I’ll have no need to take from ya. And I cleaned for my gang when I was younga’. I’m a fast learner, if you give me the chance.”

“Why don’t you use Basic normally? Speaking like the way you do doesn’t do you any favors.”

“I…” Rey bit her bottom lip nervously. She didn’t want to tell him that she was beaten whenever she messed up, her refined accent bleeding into her speech. “I was encouraged not to. You know, to blend in the lower district,” she finished lamely. It was a flimsy excuse and she knew it.

She breathed a sigh of relief when Ben overlooked her weak explanation.

“I would have to teach you manners and etiquette, if I were to let you stay. Thankfully, I seldom have visitors,” Ben said as he mixed his own tea. “I would probably have to educate you on how people in the upper district work, as to not draw any unwanted attention. Can I trust that this is not a waste of my time?”

Rey looked up in shock. “Yes! Does that mean…?” She trailed off and left her question hanging.

Draining his tea quickly, Ben stood up and straightened his suit. “Yes, it does. Now if you follow me, I can introduce you to the rest of the staff. There’s not many and you’ve already met Hux.”

Quickly pinching a circular cake from the tray, Rey shuffled after him through the hallway towards the stairs. “’Am surprised you even agreed.”

Just as Ben reached the stairs, he turned towards her and paused mid-step. “Consider us even.”

Rey tilted her head to the side. “Wot?”

“Don’t ever let me catch you saying ‘wot’ again.” Ben turned back around and descended the staircase, ignoring her question.

Rey followed closely behind, head tilted to the side as she mentally searched her memories of where she could have met him before. She was honestly surprised at how agreeing Ben was. Remembering when she first saw him in his bedroom, Rey thought him to be menacing with his wide frame and imposing figure. She would never have guessed him to be as polite as he had been.

With her head immersed in her thoughts, her sock-clad feet hit the corner of the carpeted stairs and made her fall into the man in front of her. She let out a yelp, expecting to roll down the stairs and take Ben with her but a firm hand grasped her forearm, steadying her to regain her footing.

“Are you okay?”

Rey looked up and was hit with a sense of deja vu, her memory triggering as he waited for her answer. Keeping her eyes on his face, Rey moved into his personal space and reached behind his head. She felt him still at her presence but ignored it, gathering his black hair and holding it at the base of his neck. “You caught me that day too,” she murmured softly, amazed at how small the world seemed despite the sheer size of Corellia.

She barely spoke louder than a whisper but Ben heard her clearly. “Yes, it was quite a shock seeing you again.”

“How do you even remember me? There are thousands in Corellia.” She stared in wonder at him with his hair still clasped in her hands.

“How can I forget a girl with such a unique hairstyle? One who even bothers to say sorry after bumping into me.” Ben reached around and eased her fingers from his hair. “Come, they’ve heard us coming and are waiting for us.”

 


	7. Chapter 7

_It’s not how far you fall, but how high you bounce that counts. –Zig Ziglar_

 

Chapter Six

 

Stepping into the warm kitchen, Rey noticed Hux talking to a short old lady with wispy white hair and burnt-orange skin, a pair of thick spectacles perched on her nose. Rey tried to crane her neck to see if anyone else was going to join them in the kitchen, but gave up when Ben cleared his throat. The old lady stopped her conversation with the butler, hand laid on his arm, and gave Rey and Ben her full attention. Reluctantly, Hux soon followed suit.

Seeing the two wait on him, Ben started. “This is Maz Kanata and Armitage Hux. Maz is the cook and Hux is butler of this house.”

“There’s no one else?” asked Rey.

Ben shook his head. “I live a simple lifestyle. I have no need for extra staff, but I’m sure Hux is tired of doubling as the maid. This is,” Ben turned to Rey, beckoning her to introduce herself.

“Rey,” she answered, eyes sliding to the two other employees. Maz was small, barely reaching her waist, and looking on with a gentle kindness she had never encountered. Hux, however, watched her with annoyance and a tinge of wariness.

“Rey,” continued Ben, “is to be the new maid and housekeeper. Please welcome her and help her settle in. As you heard before, she is not from these parts but I will ensure that her Basic is up to scratch. It’s not necessary to give the Bluebloods something else to gossip about. Isn’t that right, Rey?”

She wasn’t sure who or what Bluebloods were but hearing the way her name rolled off Ben’s tongue distracted her. It sounded breathy. She wasn’t used to her name to be uttered in such a way. It made her falter in her reply. “Ya…I mean, yes.”

Ben nodded at her, analysing her stature and appearance. “Maz,” he started, “Do you think any of the old uniforms will fit her? I would be grateful if you could help her settle in.”

Maz nodded. “Of course, sir. Come along, child.”

Rey let herself be pulled along by the old lady, her head whirring as she was led through the door at the back of the kitchen. As she left, she turned around to catch Ben’s eyes. He gave her a look of reassurance before addressing Hux.

“Hux, please prepare one of the guest room upstairs.”

Rey heard the faint murmur of affirmation before the door slid closed behind her. She now found herself in a sparse room containing a single bed, small bedside table, and a wardrobe.

“These are my quarters. Wait here for a moment while I go see if one of the spare uniforms will fit you,” said Maz, leaving Rey alone before she could reply.

Once alone, Rey’s feet wandered around the room, the involuntary childlike curiosity bubbling within her. The bed itself was tempting to try out. There were too many people within Plutt’s gang so it wasn’t rational to provide beds to _everyone_. It was already hard to find run-down, empty buildings with enough rooms to house their large group, so it was only natural for everyone to sleep on frumpy piles of sheets as makeshift beds. Even the girls’ ‘work room’ was void of beds. Being the leader and responsible for all the credits collected, Plutt was the only one who slept comfortably.

“Ah, here we go,” Maz said, returning to the room. She patted down an old black and white uniform and held it up to Rey. Taking it into her own hands to hold against her, she saw that it was a black long sleeved dress that ended just above her ankles. “Good,” nodded Maz, “We have a few in size so I’ll get the rest washed for you. Hope you don’t mind using that one for now until the others have been cleaned.”

A broad smile crept onto Rey’s face. “Nah, this is great!” She couldn’t stop the excitement from rising within her, giddy at the prospect of receiving clothes that were _clean_.

“It’s ‘no’, my dear,” corrected Maz. She chuckled as Rey snapped her mouth shut and nodded dutifully. “Master Solo mentioned that you’re not from around here. Given your speech and the dirt smeared on your face,” Rey quickly rubbed at her face as Maz continued, “I’d say you’re from the lower district, correct?”

Rey was unsure how she should answer. Even though Ben was accepting of her background, she wasn’t sure how Maz would take it. She understood how upper district folks thought but she didn’t know how the staff they employed viewed the districts and different classes. Rey was already aware of the distrust Hux had towards her but she was still wary of Maz.

“Don’t worry, child. I don’t hold the same values as the other Bluebloods do. Not everyone is born into wealth and we all have to do what we must to survive.” Maz smiled up at Rey. “If I guessed correctly and you’re the thief who stole into this house last week, then we are going to get along splendidly.”

“’Am sorry.” Rey lowered her head in shame. Now in the presence of people who she assumed were more well off than she was, Rey felt a sudden shame of what her previous occupation involved.

Rey felt herself being pulled into a tight hug. “Hush. I was like you once.”

“Really?” Rey said, shocked.

Maz nodded. “Oh yes. Let’s get you cleaned up and I’ll tell you more about it.”

It was like an out-of-body experience. Rey listened intently as she was pushed into the adjoining bathroom. It had been a week since she left Plutt’s gang and even longer since she last had anything close to a bath. She winced as she released her hair from her mud-caked buns and gingerly peeled off her chest band. She could help but feel a rush of relief as she dropped the tight bindings from her body.

As she set herself into the tub while Maz quickly filled it with warm water, Rey’s toes curled and her shoulders relaxed at the warmth that surrounded her.  

“I grew up in the lower district of a city called Takodana. I’m not sure if you would have heard of it though. It’s been years since it crumbled into ruins.” Maz doused a bucket of warm water over Rey’s head and rubbed soap into a rich lather against her dirty hair. “I was a thief as a child but grew into becoming a smuggler once I was old enough. Eventually, when I had enough experience to know who and what to avoid, I would travel to different cities, collecting small trinkets and antiques that were worth something to someone.”

“How did you end up here?” asked Rey softly, her eyes having slipped shut long ago to the kneading of Maz’s fingers and her gentle voice.

“When you become good at something, people will always become jealous. It doesn’t matter if you’re rich or poor, the same can be said for everyone. I developed a reputation as the ‘pirate queen’ and as much as it drew business, it also caught the attention of the city’s security force.”

“They took everything away, din’ they?”

Maz chuckled and rinsed her hair before applying another lather. “Yes, they did. I was lucky though, to get a good amount of years under their radar but after I was shut down, it was best for me to lay low. I tried to make a humble life for myself. Something simple and uncomplicated. I started as a kitchen maid and moved from household to household in different cities when I grew tired of them. The stigma still remains, despite Bluebloods relying on us for our services. Mistrust is deep, as if we’ll revert to our old ways and rob them blind.”

“But Ben Solo is different?” Rey lifted her arms as Maz scrubbed the grime and stench from her body.

“Oh yes, I met him ten years ago when he first arrived in Corellia. He had just bought this house and needed staff. He’s a peculiar one, that Ben Solo. Normally, Bluebloods source their staff from other like-minded individuals in the upper district unless they’re just starting out and not quite reached that status yet, but Master Solo didn’t know anyone. From the looks of it, he preferred it to remain that way. He purposely sought out middle ring individuals. I was a cook at the time for a restaurant whose owner wasn’t always the most…patient individual. Master Solo saw me being mistreated one day and took me in.”

Maz let out a bark of laughter. “I’m not the best cook, which was probably why my past employers absolutely despised me, but Master Solo never complained about my food. He’s been brought up proper. He’s one of the good ones.”

Rey stepped out of the tub and took the offered towel to dry herself. “What’s a Blueblood? Solo mentioned them before too.”

“Bluebloods are the noblemen. The highest of the upper district. Technically, Master Solo is also a Blueblood but he prefers not to be referred to as one. He’d rather not be associated with them if he can help it.”

Rey pondered the information she was given. Ben Solo seemed to be too good to be true. She wondered what happened in his life that set him apart from the others. From what she had seen and heard, noblemen didn’t care about the people beneath them. They had no humanity. And yet, Maz was evidence of Ben’s genuine personality. Normally, the rich folk - Bluebloods, Rey corrected inwardly - wouldn’t keep Maz around for as long as Ben had, so there must be some truth to Maz’s words.

Just as Rey pulled on a spare pair of undergarments and the dusty white collared dress over her head, a knock sounded from the door that joined the kitchen. Maz left her in the bathroom to see who was there. Rey remained hidden, her eye catching her reflection in the small mirror above the basin.

The grime was washed away and her skin seemed to have brightened automatically. When she was lucky enough to rinse the dirt from her body, she never took her hair out of her buns, leaving a muggy, cakey feeling always present on her head. The towel was still draped over her shoulder and she ran it over her hair’s dripping ends. The scent that clung to her locks made her want to keep her hair down all the time to never part from its pleasantness.However, it wasn’t practical in any sense and she wasn’t _entirely_ oblivious about what maids looked like.

Finding a loose loop nearby, Rey pulled her hair back into a single bun and tried to mimic the appearance of a maid she had once seen in the middle district, patting down any stray moisture that lingered on her neck with her towel.

Maz returned with something familiar clutched in her small hands. “My boots!” cried Rey.

“We were going to throw them away, but Master Solo kept them on the off chance that you would return. And you did.” She smiled, handing over the boots and a folded pair of stockings. “Hux has sent for the other dresses to be cleaned and to purchase shoes for you. You should receive them by the end of the day, but it would be silly for you to walk around barefoot so these will have to do.”

Rey thanked her and sat on the edge of the bed, shimmying into the stockings and boots. She looked rather out of place with her large, old manly boots offsetting the black dress, but look of approval on Maz’s face put her worries to rest.

“Your meals will be taken in the kitchen whilst Master Solo’s are usually served in his study. He rarely uses his dining room, but ensure that it’s clean on the off-chance he has company. You are to address him as Master Solo unless he has granted you otherwise. Now shoo, I need to prepare lunch. The Master should be upstairs and ready to show you around properly.” Maz gently pushed Rey towards the foyer before turning to the island in the middle of the kitchen.

Just as Rey started up the stairs, Maz called back and poked her head through the doorway. “Oh, and Rey?” Rey paused in her step and looked down at the smiling old woman. “Welcome to the family.”

 


	8. Chapter 8

_A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new. –Albert Einstein_

 

Chapter Seven

 

Stepping onto the second floor landing was different this time. She didn’t have the time to take in her surroundings before, but now she noticed that she hadn’t missed much. The walls were void of any sentimental pictures, only generic landscape paintings hung on the maroon walls. The hallway was empty except for the occasional potted plant.

As Rey wandered towards the study, she paused at one of the potted plants and leant in, catching a petal between her fingers. She never really had the chance to appreciate such beauty. It was a nice change. The light flowery scent that drifted through her nostrils made Rey exhale and breathe deeply. Maybe this was the stability for which she always yearned.  

Lightly knocking on the door, Rey let a few beats pass before pushing the door open. Ben was seated behind his desk once more, head down and looking over papers that were strewn all over the surface before him. “Ah, Rey. Feeling better?” asked Ben, nodding in approval at her tidy appearance.

“Yes…Master Solo,” replied Rey, remembering Maz’s words.

Ben nodded. “I see Maz gave you a few pointers, which is good.” He stood up, casting a glance at the papers before making his way toward the doorway. “In public, you are to address me as Master Solo or sir but in private, you may call me Ben. Maz and Hux have the same privileges and we do not discriminate here. One last thing before I give you the grand tour.” Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a small gold pin with a ‘S’ insignia carved into the shiny surface. He leaned in close and fastened the pin to her collar. “All we have to do is wait for your shoes to arrive and your uniform is complete. Come, I’ll show you around.”

Striding out of the study, Ben brought her to the next room over. Tuning the knob, he pushed open the heavy door to reveal something extraordinary to Rey. In the middle of the room was a large, sturdy table but lining the walls were shelves and shelves of books, extending from the carpeted floor all the way to the ceiling. To the side was a fireplace, with only embers of a low fire remaining in the hearth.

Crossing the threshold, she looked around in wonder and was enveloped in comfort and warmth. The other rooms in the house were warm, but this room, with large plush armchairs by the window and heavy velvet drapes hanging from the curtain rods, had a feeling that made her safe. Maybe it was the atmosphere, maybe it was the warm glow that bathed the room. Either way, a smile involuntarily twitched onto her face.  

“I am usually out, attending to business during the day but after dinner, I will give you lessons to work on your Basic. It’s passable but best to keep practicing so you don’t slip up in public. I’ll also educate you on etiquette and how the upper district works. Besides cleaning, you will fetch the morning paper and visit the marketplace as often as necessary. I have the list for today from Maz, so I’ll quickly show you to your room before heading out. I’ll accompany you to the market today before I have to go to the office.”

He led Rey further down the corridor, passing another door along the way, before stopping at the second to last door. Rey’s eyes couldn’t help but stray to the window at the end of the corridor, the memory of slipping through the window playing in her mind. She made a mental note to ensure that that window was locked.

“This is your room.”

It wasn’t as grand as Ben’s room, judging from her brief visit, but it was slightly better than Maz’s room downstairs. Its contents were similar: a bed, wardrobe, small fireplace and door that led to a bathroom. Simple, but it was more than what Rey could hope for.

“The room next to yours is Hux’s and to the other side, another visitor’s room. Normally, all three of these rooms are offered for guests, but there’s no point in maintaining three empty rooms that aren’t used. _If_ someone were to spend the night, we’ll just have to pull out the more lavish sheets and curtains. But for now, this should do.”

Rey was excited to go to sleep that night. To have her own bed, much less her own _room_ , made her throw her arms around Ben in gratitude. “Thank you! I won’t let you down!” Feeling the man stiffen against her, Rey pulled back immediately, as if she was burned. “S-Sorry, sir. I got ahead of meself.”

“Myself,” corrected Ben. “And it's fine, it was just… surprising. Come, let’s leave for the markets so I can get to work sometime today,” he chided gently before leaving the room. Rey gave her new room a once over before darting after Ben.

The marketplace was different from the ones she had been to before, even from those in the middle district. Everything seemed more orderly and cleaner. There didn’t appear to be  police officers patrolling the stalls, harassing the shopkeepers or their patrons. There was only a pair stationed at the perimeter of the marketplace who clapped a heavy hand on Rey’s shoulder.

“Excuse me, Miss, but I haven’t seen you around these parts before. What is your business here?” The police officer towered over her, eyes narrowing in suspicion at her dusty uniform. “Impersonation is a serious offence that we do not take lightly.”

“I-I…” Rey stuttered, looking around desperately for Ben. She tried to look past the police officer but his partner stepped from behind, blocking any chance of Rey looking into the markets. Panic seized her, past habits and instincts starting to kick in. She tightened her hold on the basket Ben had passed to her earlier, body tense and ready to fight if they laid a hand on her.

“Officer Zuvio!” A stern, booming voice made the officers snap back, spines stiff as they stepped aside. It was like a spell had been cast on them, Ben’s voice commanding authority in a way Rey had never seen. “Do you not see my family insignia on her uniform? This is my new maid. She is part of my staff and she is here to shop, just like everyone else here. She is not to be questioned again, is that clear?” Ben leaned into the officers’ personal space, his dark eyes boring into their trembling bodies. Even as the officers nodded, he still crowded their space and caused them to tremble. “Good.”

With a look of distaste thrown over his shoulder, Ben returned to the market with Rey hot on his heels. She didn’t need to be told twice to follow.

“They won’t harass you again,” he murmured as they navigated through the crowds together.

The sun was high in the sky by the time they finished purchasing everything on the list. His instructions were simple. As long as Rey bought from the specific stalls he had pointed out, she shouldn’t have any trouble with the locals. Thankfully, it was so crowded that Rey and Ben had to shuffle to get from stall to stall. No one had space to look down at her shoes, much to Rey’s relief. Some people passing by them threw looks of contempt at the sight of her unkept uniform but sobered at the sight of Ben close to her. He didn’t seem worried, acidic remarks on the tip of his tongue if anyone questioned her presence.

They parted ways at an intersection near the Solo household, with Ben giving directions back home before he left for work. While Ben didn’t give any hints as to what his job was, Rey was content to wait until she could ask Maz about what it was he actually did.

There were stools available around the island in the kitchen, but Rey preferred to stand. She leaned against the wooden table, faint remains of flour still present on the surface, and took a bite of the flaky meat pie set before her. The buttery pastry and the flavors that burst in her mouth at the first bite made her eyes slip shut in ecstasy. All the rations she had ever lived off were limited to stale bread, fruit, and bits of meat offcuts from the more delectable meals that Plutt bestowed upon himself. In her youth, she had tried stealing some warm meats from the kitchen but the bruise that resulted from that stunt deterred her from repeating. Rey chuckled. If she could tell her past self that things _did_ get better, her past self wouldn’t have bothered with drooling over subpar meals.

As she finished her pie, Rey concluded that it was better than anything Plutt had the pleasure of eating. “Here, have another. You’re far too skinny to function,” commented Maz as she slid another circular pastry onto her plate.

Eagerly starting on her second helping, Rey listened intently as Maz spoke about their employer.

“Whilst Master Solo doesn’t _own_ any companies, he contributes to and oversees smaller to average-sized businesses. As a result, he’s known throughout the middle district as a generous businessman, but the upper district has mixed opinions. Some don’t see an issue with his charity, while others are firm against mixing with the lower districts. When he first arrived in Corellia, they were rather vocal about it. Now, they just accept that it’s part of Master Solo’s nature. As a result, it’s made him quite desirable, but he thinks with his head rather than anything else.”

Rey tilted her head to the side, wiping the side of her mouth with the edge of her sleeve. “What do you mean?” She caught the napkin that was thrown at her, meekly wiping the corners of her mouth.

“Well, it’s obvious that some families in the upper district are jealous of his success. Every now and then fathers would call upon him, in hopes that he would be interested in their daughters. He has influence that other Bluebloods refuse to work for, relying on credits too much to socialise with lower folk. But no, he has never shown interest in marrying and permanently settling within the upper district. Like I said, he thinks differently from other Bluebloods.

“All he requests is respect. In private, he does not care for what we call him but we are to address him properly in public. He’s not hiding our origins, but he’s not publically announcing it either. He’s a private man and we are probably the closest thing he has to a family.”

As Maz spoke, Rey pushed around the remaining crumbs on her plate. “Like me,” she mumbled.

“Yes, like all of us. None of us has anywhere else to go. This place is all we have left.”

“What about Hux?”

Maz smiled tightly. “Now, when I first met that boy, he was as snarky as one could be, considering his situation. He’s cooled off over the years but still rather guarded. When he warms up to you more, maybe he will tell you how Master Ben acquired him.” She laughed. “Might be a while for you though. He can hold quite a grudge and you _did_ break his nose.”

Collecting their plates, Rey placed them in the sink and started to wash up. “I should apologise for that next time I see him. He’s not around for lunch?”

“Oh, no. He’s been sent to fetch the remainder of your uniform but he should be back for supper.”

Just as Maz predicted, Rey didn’t see Hux until later that night. She had spent the day with Maz, assisting in any way she could. She helped her prepare supper to welcome Master Solo before starting on dinner, peeling the carrots and potatoes she had bought earlier from the markets.

Once dinner was sent up to Ben, Rey took over washing the dishes as Maz put the kettle on the stove, boiling water for tea to serve Ben after he was finished with dinner. Fifteen minutes passed before Hux returned with empty dishes. Just as he was about to place them in the designated ‘dirty dishes’ area, he paused and dumped the plates with a loud thump. Rey looked at him questioningly but froze when his hand darted out to catch her wrist.

“This is not acceptable.”

The sneer in his voice was clear as day. Rey ripped her hand from his clutch, brows furrowed as she tried to keep her anger in check. She cleared her throat and found her voice. “ _What_ do you mean?”

“These dishes.” He held up some silverware close to his face, analysing the shiny surface. “I don’t know where you came from, but if you don’t take this job seriously then I suggest you leave.”

Rey gaped at his audacity. “I _am_ serious and they _are_ clean!”

“Does _this_ look clean?!” He thrusted the fork towards her before moving onto the plates that were ready to be dried. “How? How can you not even _see_ how filthy these dishes are? _Maz_! You were supposed to oversee she was performing her duties properly while I was out!”

Before Maz could open her mouth to say her piece, Rey interjected. “Look, ye best get off your high horse! Who do you think you are!?”

Hux slammed the plate he was holding onto the table, not caring that it broke into three pieces. “ _I am the butler_ ,” he hissed. “I am in charge of how this house is run. I am in charge of the servants.” Rey tried to open her mouth to protest but Hux kept on talking. “Yes, that’s right. As pretty as Master Solo’s words were, it doesn’t mean we are exempt from our jobs. I am a butler. You are a maid. Maz is the cook. That is all the world sees us as. _Do not forget your place_.”

Rey stared at the ginger haired man. His hair was slicked back so not a tendril was out of place. His left hand was pressed behind his back as his right hand held the once together plate. His posture was precise and matched his features: sharp and straight. She looked at Maz from the corner of her eyes and noticed that despite Maz’s age, she had a similar posture. Even with the simple task of preparing tea, her shoulders were set back and her head was up. Rey looked back down at her own posture and sighed in defeat. She had to admit, the silverware she washed didn’t gleam as bright as the ones that were stored. She knew she would have to be more meticulous than when she worked for Plutt but she underestimated how thorough she had to be.

“I understand. I’m sorry.” She held her head down, shame evident that she couldn’t even do the simplest of jobs to the expected standards.

“Make sure this doesn’t happen again and your apology is accepted.”

Rey nodded and stared at the bubbles her hands were submerged in.

The butler let out a long sigh and took the offered tray of tea from Maz. “Proper training for you begins tomorrow but one piece of advice before then. Because of how you came to us, I will only say this once: do not stick your nose in other people’s businesses. If you come across something locked in your duties, you ignore it and move on. If you overhear something that you feel you should not have, pretend you did not. They are simple rules, one that even _you_ should be able to follow. Not only is it _rude_ -” Hux stressed the last word. “-but Master Solo does not _tolerate such deceit_. Is that clear?” A nod. “Good. Your uniform is already placed in your wardrobe. Ensure that they are always clean and pressed. Unless, you need help even doing that.” At Rey’s guilty look, Hux let out a scoff and stormed out of the kitchen, his footsteps an indication of his exasperation. If Rey didn’t feel so bad, she would have been impressed that despite his annoyed demeanour, the china on the tray didn’t once clang against each other.

Once Hux was gone, Rey’s shoulders slumped dejectedly. Maz placed a comforting hand on her arm, her height preventing her from reaching Rey’s shoulder. “Fear not, child. We all had to start somewhere. Even him.”

 


	9. Chapter 9

_Everything has beauty, but not everyone can see. –Confucius_

 

Chapter Eight

 

Just as Rey promised, she was a fast learner. It was a rocky start to learn the proper method of cleaning silverware as well as how to fold and press laundry, and how to turn down and make a bed. It took her a few days to get used to her new routine, but by the end of her first week, her technique was passable and on the way to being perfect. When it was time for Hux to teach her how to open the fireplace, he was mildly surprised at how fast Rey was able to build a bright fire. At least, that’s what Rey liked to think. It was hard to tell what Hux was thinking, let alone feeling, by his stoic face.

Her lessons with Ben were also coming along nicely. He only had to correct her slang when she got worked up over something, and even then it wasn’t a large slip up. Mostly, her outbursts happened once Ben started to teach her more than just language, introducing her to etiquette and formalities within the upper district.  

“Respect is everything. Respect gives you power and with power, anything is accessible to you. However, respect can not be bought, but earned. Bluebloods do not understand this concept, which is why they don’t grasp the concept of gratitude. They live in extravagance with copious amounts of fine food, more than they know what to do with. For all their privilege, they lack in honesty. Loyalty is not in their vocabulary. What’s the point of earning loyalty when credits can buy something similar? Even within families, betrayal runs deep. When you visit the markets, or any time you venture outside, don’t trust anyone.”

His final words stayed with Rey, replaying in her mind ever since. She didn’t expect the Bluebloods to live such lifestyles, but after much thought, she couldn’t bring herself to feel surprised. People in the slums fought dirty, so why wouldn’t the Bluebloods?

Their time together, however, did not solely comprise of educating her. Rey had started to learn how to read before she was abandoned on the streets. After she was taken in by Plutt, she had to make do with what little she had. There were a few books kept around the base for the younger children, her included, to educate themselves. Most of the children at that time were older than her, sneering down at her as she tried to read what measly books were available. Even though she was smart and quick to learn, there were some words that she would never know the meaning of, or how to pronounce.

The situation did not change even as Rey sat across from Ben, a thin story book in hand, eyes drinking the words hungrily but only a few making sense. She peeked over the top of the book. Ben was reviewing some papers he had brought along from his office, brows knitted together with a pen hanging loosely in his fingers. A pair of glasses was perched on the his nose and was pushed up every now and then when the spectacles slid down the bridge of his nose. He had been busy the past few days, as seen by the cluster of thick black hair on his chin and peppering his upper lip. Normally, he would give his facial hair a trim every few days, but he simply hadn’t had the time recently.

Rey was flattered he would still make the effort to spend time with her, whether it be teaching her or sharing a fire together in the library. Chewing on her bottom lip, she contemplated whether or not she should bother Ben when he was clearly engrossed in his thick bundle of papers. There were a few words that she didn’t understand and guessed at the meaning, assuming she was correct, but a particular word kept cropping up that she couldn’t fathom the meaning.

“What is it?” asked Ben, not looking up from his notes.

Rey broke from her musings and padded across the room. “Um, this word. It keeps appearing,” she paused, “And I’m not sure,” she trailed off.

Ben glimpsed at the passage. “Neoteric? It’s someone who advocates new ideas.”

“Oh, so someone like yourself?”

He chuckled at the compliment. “I suppose so, when I’m able to look presentable to clients.”

Rey clucked her tongue humorously. “You look like such a scruffy-lookin’ nerfherder.”

“What did you call me?!” he asked incredulously, eyebrows disappearing behind his bangs.

“You know,” Rey started, motioning her hands over his facial hair. “It’s been awhile since you’ve trimmed it.”

There was a long beat of silence and she feared that she overstepped her boundaries. Finally, Ben looked at her and asked her, “Do you like it?”

She laughed. “It doesn’t matter what I like, Ben. Like you said, it’s what your clients prefer.”

Turning around, Rey made her way back to her seat to continue her reading, missing the thoughtful look that remained on his face.

It was a month into her service when Ben called her into his study one morning. Stepping into the warm study, Rey unconsciously played with the ends of her white apron as she waited for Ben to address her. He seemed to be gathering his papers frantically, hand carding through his thick hair and making a mess of it.

“Rey, I’ll need you to run an errand for me in the middle district. I thought I would have time, but I’m late for a meeting I have with an associate and it’s on the other side of this district. Could you deliver these documents for me? Here are instructions on how to get there. The pin on your uniform acts like a district pass, so you shouldn’t run into any issues. Let me know if you do. Sorry, I’ve got to head out now!”

A whirlwind of ruffled hair blew past her, leaving Rey with a set of thick documents hurriedly thrust into her hands. She faintly heard Hux bid him farewell from downstairs before looked down at her documents. They were wrapped in a thick bundle of scratchy burlap, thick twine collated the loose edges of the fabric and ordered everything into a neat bundle.

She pinned her cloak around her neck and walked up to the front door. She had finished her morning duties already so now was a good time to run Ben’s errand. “I’m going to deliver some documents for Master Solo in the middle district. I shouldn’t be too long.” Hux nodded and held the door open for her.

Stepping onto the street, Rey pulled her cloak around her tightly and held the documents close to her. Despite the warm sun shining down on her face, the air still had a bite to it. There were still a few months until the heart of winter arrived and she couldn’t be more thankful to be in a warm home this winter.

The directions given to her were succinct and straightforward, just like Ben promised. She found the street the establishment was located on easily. Since starting her job with Ben, she had only followed the familiar route to the markets as she was shown on her first day, so she was slightly wary of the new territory into which she was venturing. She hadn’t returned to the middle district since starting her new life and wouldn’t be surprised if no one recognised her in her crisp, clean uniform and hair pulled back in a single bun. After all, she had worn her hair in her signature three bun style all her life and only someone who knew her intimately would place her familiar face.

Just as she thanked her stars for not running into any trouble, she rounded a corner and bumped into a wall. A warm wall with a smell that Rey recognised all too well.

Rey stepped back immediately and wrinkled her nose. “Plutt.”

The large, purple squash-faced man looked down at her in disgust. “You. I’m surprised you’re still alive!” Plutt let out a roaring laugh. “But seeing you in this getup makes me right all along. Thieving for bigger fish, aren’t we?”

Rey looked around frantically. Plutt was anything but subtle and his booming voice started to draw attention of passing folk. She considered herself beyond lucky, finding herself a respectable job that housed and provided for her better than she could ever dream. She didn’t want to be associated with her past life any longer.

Pushing past the despicable man, Rey hurried towards her destination and slipped inside. She tried to not let the loud laughs bother her and kept her chin up when the owner looked at her quizzically. She noticed the owner look past her and at the crime boss outside, shooting her a disapproving look.

Knowing she had to salvage her reputation, and in turn, Master Solo’s, Rey bowed politely and pulled the bundled documents from her robes. “Apologies for the commotion outside. Master Solo has sent me to deliver these documents to you.”

Imitating Hux’s well-mannered posture, Rey remained silent as the owner took the proffered documents and reviewed them. She kept her hands clasped behind her back, hidden from view, and waited for further instructions. After a few moments, the owner nodded in satisfaction and dismissed Rey.

“My thanks but next time, try not to engage with that mob boss. He is trying to impeach in these parts and should have no business here.” Saving her breath, Rey merely nodded in agreement and moved towards the door. “Oh, one more thing. I heard Master Solo is to attend the Coruscant Society Gala next month.”

Rey caught the hidden question in the owner’s innocent statement. Outwardly, she maintained her calm exterior but internally, she floundered for a response. Officially, she wasn’t even to know about the gala, but her stunt that resulted in getting kicked out of Plutt’s gang was the only reason why she had an inkling of what the owner was talking about.

Then, she saw a flicker in his eyes. He was testing her. “I apologise once more. I am not privy to Master Solo’s private activities or plans.” The owner nodded, satisfied with her answer and waved at her dismissively once more.

As Rey started making her way back home, Ben’s words echoed in her head.

_“Don’t trust anyone.”_

It seemed that that piece of advice was true for everyone.

Weaving her way through the streets, Rey sighed in relief. She didn’t see another glimpse of her former boss.

She was a few blocks from the upper district border when a voice called out to her. Turning around, her face became stony and cold when she recognised the restaurant owner who was trying to catch her attention.

“Miss!” Rey narrowed her eyes at the snivelly man who rushed onto the street to meet her. “The sun is high in the sky! You seem to be on the way back to your Lord’s house! Can I tempt you with a cup of tea or a snack here, in this fine establishment?”

“No, thank you.” It took all of Rey’s restraint to remain polite, just like how Hux and Ben had drilled her. Whilst Ben had cleaned up her speech, Hux had given lessons on what constituted as proper behaviour when in public. She still didn’t know much about Hux, but she could tell that he held Ben in a high regard, always warning her not to embarrass their employer in public.

A shine of gold caught the man’s eye. “My, are you from the house of Master Solo?” gushed the small man. He crowded Rey’s personal space, greed evident on his face. “Tea is on the house! Might I prepare you a meal to go along with you tea? Maybe you could put in a good word for me to your Master?”

Disgust shone in her eyes, but Rey remained courteous. The double standards this man exhibited were too much for her especially when, just a month earlier, he had chased her away for just being _near_ his restaurant, broom in hand. Rey had no interest in staying any longer at this restaurant, much less entertain this toady man’s wish to get close to Ben. She couldn’t see how this man would benefit Ben in any way.

“Master Solo’s favour cannot be bought. If he has not approached you then you are obviously not worthy of his support.”

The crestfallen look that showed on the man’s face made the corners of Rey’s mouth twitch. Without waiting for a reply, Rey quickly strode towards and crossed into the upper district boundaries.  However, she didn’t want to presume and made a mental note to mention it to Ben later that day.

It was as she was cleaning the silverware after dinner when Ben entered the kitchen and asked how her day was. “Any troubles?”

“No, sir. Although,” Rey paused but continued at his prompt. “A restaurant near the middle and upper district border would like to be part of your…network…”

Ben hummed and watched Rey closely. “And what do you think?”

“I have no say in the matter. This is entirely up to you, sir.”

“Oh, but you seemed reluctant to mention it to me. You seem to know more than you’re letting on. Tell me, what do you think I should do?”

Maz watched Rey, taking the silverware from her fingers to finish polishing them herself. With nothing in her hands, Rey wrung them nervously. “I don’t think you should affiliate yourself with that restaurant.”

“Why?”

“The owner does not share the same values you do. He would ruin your name and reputation if you show the slightest interest in supporting him. He only wants to use you to get into the upper district.”

Ben nodded and smiled. “Then I won’t support him. I trust your judgement, Rey.”

Before Rey could return to her duties, she remembered another detail. “Oh, sir, your business associate I delivered the documents to mentioned something that might be of interest to you. Something about the Coruscant Gala?”

Scoffing, Ben riled through the nearby pantry to retrieve an apple. Taking a generous bite, he shook his head and apple in front of him. “Oh no, I have no desire to attend such an event.”

“People are under the impression that you are.”

Rey watched as Ben’s eyes slipped shut, nostrils flaring as he breathed in deeply. “I never agreed to attend a gala that is obviously just trying to look chummy with me in public.”

Maz piped in. “Is it that the invitation you received a few months ago?”

“Yes, Maz,” Ben gritted out, displeased at the possibility of being forced to attend.

“Isn’t that the one where you are to bring a guest?”

“Dooku _knows_ I won’t have a guest! That is why I had no intention of attending!” he said firmly, angrily pacing within the small confines of the kitchen. “This is just another attempt at getting me to join their trivial _society_. They have every intention of throwing their Coruscanti females at me, hoping that one will seduce me. Do they _actually_ believe I would be so stupid to fall into any of their pathetic traps?”

The fire that burned in Rey’s eyes was something new to her. She had never seen him this worked up, brows furrowed together and creating lines that made his face much more severe. “So it’s just an extravagant plan to get your wealth?”

“Yes,” Ben hissed. “I’ll just have to inform Count Dooku that I have fallen ill and will not be able to attend!”

“You know that they’ll keep hunting you,” Maz commented, ignoring the glare directed at her. “Although, there is another possibility.”

Ben perked up at the thought of another solution. “Go on.”

“If you arrived with someone, and genuinely appeared to be together, it would deter the females _and_ the Lords there from trying to recruit you. The females would lose hope and the Lords would simply have to resort to more honest ways to get you to join their society.”

“Yes, that is an _excellent_ plan, Maz, except I _don’t_ have anyone. Don’t get me wrong, I would love to bring you to the Gala. I would pay a high price to see you thrash them with your remarks but I doubt they would believe we are together.” Maz chuckled and brushed off the sarcasm.

“I could do it?” Rey offered, half seriously, half jokingly. She thumbed the corners of her apron and waited for Ben’s sarcasm to shoot down her offer. When none came, Rey glanced at Maz, surprised to see her smiling widely at her. Ben however, remained passive.

“I think it’s a good idea, Ben,” Maz said kindly, knowing full well she was treading on thin ice with the use of his name.

“Why would you want to subject yourself to such a thing?” Ben demanded.

Meeting his eyes, Rey stood her ground and look at him with honesty on her sleeve. “It’s the least I could do for accepting me into your home. You’re a fair employer and you treat us well. But if you’re worried that I’ll fall in love with you, you don’t need to worry about that!” Rey may have said that a bit too loudly but she really did mean it. She didn’t need fickle emotions to ruin the one good thing she had.

 


	10. Chapter 10

_Certain things catch your eye, but pursue only those that capture the heart. –Ancient Indian Proverb_

 

Chapter Nine

 

“Again.”

Rey wedged her lip between her teeth and focussed on moving her feet in the correct formation. “One, two, three. One, two, three,” she repeated softly under her breath.

It had been a month since Ben agreed to allow Rey attend the gala as his partner. Since then, the importance of the lessons she received from him had doubled. It was one thing to know about how Bluebloods work, but it was another to _understand_ how they think, to mislead them into believing she was one of them. Ben started to put more emphasis on how she should respond in certain situations. While people in the slums resolved altercations between gangs with their fists, the Bluebloods wove webs of deceit that would eliminate their enemy without even having to lift a finger.

“I’ve seen many families fall over the years. Some become outcasts, some end their own lives, and some just fade away into the unknown. This is just a big game for them. You just need to stay one step ahead of them and you’ll be fine,” Ben had said weeks ago. “Keep a level head and you’ll survive.”

“Is that what you did?” she asked in return.

“I generally avoid them, but on the rare occasion I’m forced into these situations, I try my best. It’ll be a small comfort knowing that I won’t be going into this alone.”

She couldn’t stop the smile from spreading across her face that day and whenever she thought back to that conversation. It was different, the frankness between them, and it made Rey feel like a weight had been lifted.

Whilst Ben taught her what he knew with the small moments they had together, her preparation for the gala relied on the combined efforts of Maz and Hux. The three of them would clear their duties early in the day so they could spend more time teaching her various things that would aid her. The once neglected dining room was now frequently used, the modestly sized room the perfect place for Rey to learn basic table manners.

Manners were inconsequential when she was with Plutt’s gang. They were lucky to have food, and the only time Rey had seen cutlery being used was in passing. At first, learning for what each spoon and fork were used was an exciting experience. Now, Rey wanted to thump her head repeatedly against the table. Hux tutted and whipped a wooden stick across her knuckles every time she reached for the incorrect utensil or struck the back of her chair whenever her shoulders slipped from its rigidity.

“Ow! Do all Bluebloods ‘ave to go through this?” Rey grumbled when her fingers were rapped again, her accent slipping due to frustration. The frosty look directed at her slip up made her cower slightly and continue listening to Hux’s instructions without another complaint.

A few days before the gala, Rey was pleased with her progress. Her table manners were acceptable and she had learnt all the appropriate social cues. The only remaining problem, one with which she struggled throughout the month, was dancing like a high-born.

“Stop looking at your feet!”

“If I don’t, I’ll lose count!”

Maz watched from a plush armchair with a cup of tea cradled in her small hands. At every event thrown by Bluebloods, participating in at least three dances was a requirement: opening dance, closing dance and at least one during the gala in hopes of building new relationships. Since Ben attending with an unknown female on his arm, it was without a doubt that Rey would be scrutinized by everyone in attendance.

As the maid and butler tried once more, Ben ventured into the living room and propped a leg against Maz’s armrest, both of them watching as Rey unsuccessfully learnt the dance steps.

“Still not going well?”

“No, sir. Rey _is_ trying though. She gets the steps but after the fifth box step, she seems to lose her concentration and step on Hux’s foot. He’s at the end of his patience, I believe.”

Ben rubbed his chin. “Hux,” he called, stopping the pair from their further attempts. “Have a rest. Maybe I can be of use.” Hux gave a quick nod before disengaging himself from Rey.

While Hux was stiff and cold, Rey felt sudden comfort fill her when Ben stepped in his place. Taking her hand and placing his right in the small of her back, Ben waited for Rey to get accustomed to his touch. “Ready? One, two, three.”

It was different, Rey noticed. With Hux everything felt mechanical and distant, and it didn’t help that his nose seemed permanently tipped upwards. But with Ben, his body was relaxed yet confident, warm yet firm. A few steps with her new partner and hope bubbled in her chest. Maybe she could learn this before the gala.

“Rey.”

“One, two-hmm?” Rey stopped her steps and looked up at Ben. Being this close to him, she felt her skin get clammy and something stir from within.

“You won’t be able to stare at your feet on the night. You have to learn to look at your partner.” She bit her lower lip, unsure of herself. “Trust me. Trust my lead.”

It took a few attempts, but Rey was able to relax into Ben’s arms. Instead of pre-emptively moving her feet, Ben pulled gently at her waist, directing her in which direction to move, gently squeezing her hand in encouragement. Breathing through her nostrils, she let her body be guided by him and focused on his face.

With only a few inches of space separating them, Rey could analyse his face freely. He had an unusual face. He wasn’t a conventional beauty, but then again, Rey was no expert herself. Outward appearance never mattered to her and still didn’t. However, there was something about him that seemed to hypnotise her.

The sparse pinpoint dots that decorated his face were like stars at night, and seemed to suit him. She smiled lightly and let her hand drift from his shoulder to the base of his neck. Tipping her head to the side slightly, her fingers caught the ends of his curled tendrils. His thick locks framed his face nicely, hiding his ears from sight.

Rey had seem him many times tuck his hair behind his ears when he was immersed in his work, pushing his hair clear of his face; sometimes when she brought him tea or when she arrived in the library for their lessons, he would untuck his hair from behind his ears. Apart from when she first saw him on the street, Ben never left the house with his hair pulled back, always curled in a way so it would look natural around his face. She didn’t understand why he was so embarrassed by his ears. She thought they were quite charming, but she would never tell him that. As she absentmindedly played with the ends of his hair, she heard his breath hitch, drawing her eyes from staring at his hidden ears to his face.

The warm crackling fire from the fireplace bathed them in a warm glow but illuminated his eyes in a way Rey hadn’t seen before. She had classified his eye colour as just ‘dark’, never being close enough to truly see properly. Surprisingly, they were dark brown with a thin ring of hazel on his outer iris. Rey wasn’t even aware such combinations were possible, her own being a standard light brown. It was unusual but it matched him nicely. Ben Solo was unconventional but she certainly understood why different districts found him appealing .

With the crescendo of the orchestral waltz music playing on the vinyl, Ben’s hands moved to her waist and lifted her up, spinning her around above him before placing her back on her feet. It was unexpected but natural, Rey following Ben’s lead seamlessly. As they resumed their dance, Ben whispered softly. “Your dancing seems to have improved.”

“You’re a far better teacher than Hux.” Not wanting to seem like she was smearing Hux’s name, Rey backtracked. “Not that he didn’t try! He’s been attempting to teach me every day since we arranged this.”

“Well, it seems like you’re ready for the gala now.”

As the music faded, Ben dropped his hands from her and took a step back, folding his hand over his midsection and bowing his head. Rey followed suit, except pinching the ends of her black housekeeping dress with her fingers and dropping into a low curtsey. When she rose to her full height, she noticed a frown pulled on his face. “D-Did I do something wrong?”

“No,” Ben reassured. “Nothing you didn’t know about. On the night of the gala, you are not to curtsey at anyone. Not myself or any Blueblood. You’ll be attending as my equal, Reyna Kenobi.”

Eyebrows rose around the room. “Reyna Kenobi?” Rey asked.

“Oh, yes. My family used to be close to the Kenobi family, when I was a child. The Kenobi family has enough nobility to welcome you at the gala, in case anyone decides to look into your background.”  

“But what happens if someone from the gala contacts them? They’ll know straight away that we deceived the Bluebloods.” Rey wrung her hands worriedly.

Ben stepped forward and cupped her cheek, this thumb rubbing her cheek soothingly. “Don’t worry. It’s not public knowledge, but the Kenobis are no more. Many assume they just mysteriously faded out of the public’s eye.”

“Then…how do you know?” She tried not to lean into his comforting touch.

“I was named after the last Kenobi. That was how close our families were.” His soft eyes were watching her, as if casting a spell over her. She almost wanted him to lean close, giving her a chance to breathe him in and fill her senses completely.

A cough behind them made Rey come to her senses and snap back, putting distance between herself and Ben. She turned to where the noise originated from, hiding her face and hopefully with it, the heat that was spreading across her face. Finding the pattern of the wallpaper interesting, she peeked from the corner of her eye to see a cheeky grin on Maz’s face but a disapproving frown painted on Hux’s.

“It is late and you still have business to attend to tomorrow morning, Master Solo,” Hux prompted, moving towards the fireplace to stoke the coals. After a few prods with an iron rod, he got up to his feet and waited for Ben to leave.

“Of course. Thank you for reminding me. Goodnight and thank you for this evening, Rey.” Rey nodded in response and kept her face averted, hoping he couldn’t see her blush.

Once she heard him pad across the room towards the stairwell, Rey lifted her head and blew out a long sigh. Before she could relax, Hux stepped in front of her, his steel glare fixed on her. “I hope for your sake, that you’re not deceiving him and trying to get his credits.”

Rey sobered up immediately, ignoring the faint redness that lingered on her cheeks. “I’m not deceiving anyone, Hux. I’m not interested in his credits.”

“We’ll see.” He pushed past her, not caring as he bumped into her shoulder along the way.

Trying not to let his distrustful words get to her, Rey forced a smile and looked at Maz. “Does it ever get easier with him?”

The old lady chuckled. “Eventually, but I understand why he’s doing this. In all our years serving Ben, he has never revealed this much about his past to anyone, even us.” At the sight of Rey biting her bottom lip in worry, Maz quickly comforted her. “It’s not a bad thing. Ben needs to open up to someone and if it’s you, then I can sleep easily. Don’t worry about Hux. He’ll just have to get used to you and Ben.”

Before Rey could stop her, Maz shuffled to her room, leaving Rey to mouth the words ‘me and Ben’ to the empty living room.

 


	11. Chapter 11

_Remember no one can make you feel inferior without your consent. –Eleanor Roosevelt_

 

Chapter Ten

 

Rey twisted her fingers in her lap, wringing them worriedly as she sat waiting for Maz to return to her room. Maz had forbidden her from turning around in her chair to look in the mirror, wanting Rey to wait to see what she looked like when her make-up was done. She had already put on her dress and when she first saw it hanging in her wardrobe, she didn’t expect it to be so extravagant.

When she was a scavenger, she had worn a simple band to strap and hold everything down. When she started her employment as a maid, she was given a slip that looped around her shoulder with two cups to hold her breasts in place. Rey knew her chest wasn’t very large but when she asked Maz about it, Maz insisted she wear it at all times.

However, when she was helped into the light pink dress, Rey looked around for her slip and got a shake of a head from Maz. “Oh no, dear, the back of it will show if you wear it.”

After she had stepped into her dress, she was forced into a chair with Maz bustling around her, pulling her hair into rolls that felt warm on her scalp. Once all her hair was rolled and sitting heavily on her head, Maz left to retrieve something from her room, muttering something about makeup as she did so.

Left alone in the room, Rey couldn’t help but reach up and pat her chest. She felt naked. She felt exposed. The fabric of her dress was smooth under her touch, falling freely from her fingers whenever she tried to scoop her skirt into her palm. The front of her dress covered everything with additional see-through fabric gathered and pinned on top of the dress, stretching across her collar bones and meeting together in the middle of her waist. From there, the bundled sheer fabric loosened and became another layer of her skirt, adding extra fluidity.

She supposed it was fine. The overlaid fabric was strategically arranged over her breasts and hid anything that might have been visible. Leaning back in her chair, she felt the wooden frame of her seat press against the skin of her back. Her sides were covered except for a triangle on her back, matching the draped fabric on the front.

Fiddling with the gemstone embellishments around her waist, Rey perked up when she heard Maz return. The doorknob jiggled a bit before stopping, muffled voices drifting through the door instead. Rey craned her neck, straining her ears to hear the conversation that was taking place outside her room. Judging from the deep voice, Maz was speaking to Ben.

“How is she?”

A chuckle. “Don’t worry, Ben. She’ll look like a true high born.”

“No red. They _all_ wear red. She deserves better than to be mistaken as a Blueblood.”

Rey’s brows furrowed, confused. Didn’t Ben want her to look like a complete Blueblood?

“Of course. I’ve got just the color.”

Hearing Ben’s tell-tale heavy footsteps fade away, Rey sat up straight in her chair, unable to hide her excitement of what was next in her transformation. Maz quickly slipped in, shutting the door firmly behind her, and started to empty the contents of her black pouch onto Rey’s bed. Peering over Maz’s shoulder, she saw various items laid out on her sheets: various sticks with shiny gold wrapped around them, small pots, and brushes with different thicknesses.

Rey was bursting from curiosity but she clamped it down. She only had a few hours left before she and Ben were scheduled to leave and it seemed that she was far from ready.

“Now then, let’s start, shall we?” Maz put on a different set of glasses, even thicker than her normal pair, enlarging her eyes more than Rey thought possible. Rey gave a small nod and left her face to Maz’s devices.

Rey didn’t know how much time passed before Maz was able to step back, chest puffed with pride and accomplishment. “Okay, you can see what you look like now.”

Warily, Rey stood up and turned to the mirror, eager to see what she looked like. What she saw made her blink in astonishment and disbelief. “Wot?” she gasped, not believing her eyes. She was so shocked that she didn’t even hear Maz berate her at her language slip, nor did she care.

The sleeveless dress hugged her figure and showed off her arms nicely. Spinning around, she saw the creamy skin of her back exposed, just like she guessed, but she looked beautiful. Eyes straying upwards, she had to stop herself from touching her hair.

Her hair was curled in large curls, each one cascading into the other and bringing her hair length to her shoulders. Even though her hair seemed to be drastically shortened, her new length and style made her seem more elegant and graceful. Rey could barely recognise herself. She almost pressed her nose against the mirror to get a better look at the make-up Maz applied.

Maz had done much to her, but her eyes were what mesmerised her. Powder with small flecks of gold was applied to her eyelids, and thin black lines drawn close to the outline of her eyes. Rey was unable to stop herself from staring at her reflection. It seemed to change the hue of her eyes, bringing a golden tinge to them and making her second guess if it was really her.

“One last thing.” Everything about her appearance was so amazing that Rey couldn’t help but shake, gratitude and excitement overflowing, and turned to Maz in question. Sitting back down in her chair, she watched as Maz pulled out another small pot with brush in hand. “Normally, red is the customary color, but Ben thought best to give you something different instead.”

Turning around once more, Rey saw her lips had a peach tinge to them, matching her eyes and dress perfectly. “Thank you,” she said sincerely, bending down to envelop Maz in a warm hug.

“Think nothing of it, child. The lessons we’ve given you are guidelines. Ben has already discouraged you from following them strictly, so all that’s left is for you to have fun tonight. Remember, Ben is there to help. Speaking of which, you best head off.” Maz chuckled and patted Rey gently when the hug tightened.

“Thank you,” Rey said once more before sweeping out of her room, loving the feel of the smooth fabric brushing against her legs.

As she waited for Ben in the foyer, a set of footsteps brought her out of her smiling reverie. “You look… good,” Hux finished lamely. “Like a real Blueblood.”

Rey beamed at him, not caring for how close she was to the normally distant butler. Movement from the stairwell made her head turn, eyes drawn to the dark figure who descended down the steps. Her breath got caught in her throat.

She had seen Ben in suits on a daily basis, always looking tidy for his business appointments, but nothing could prepare Rey for how he looked tonight.

He wore a grey suit, pressed and clean, and buttoned lowly, exposing his crisp white shirt underneath. Matching his suit, he wore a dark grey tie, knotted high at the base of his throat. His hair was curled, voluminous as always, but it seemed to add attractiveness. Rey’s heart was beating unbearably loudly and if this was how she was now, she was scared to think of how she was going to be on the journey to Coruscant.

Ben bent his tall body to the side playfully. “Everything alright?”

Embarrassed at her simpering heart, Rey nodded and tried to compose herself. “Perfect.”

Taking the proffered coat from Hux, Ben slipped his arms into the coat and patted himself down. “Okay, looks like we’re ready. Hux, Maz, I’m not sure when we'll be back, so don’t wait for us.”

They quickly said their goodbyes, Rey waving at Maz with excitement, and strode out the door. Coruscant was the next city over, so it would be an hour’s drive to reach the city’s border. Rey’s eyes strayed to Ben’s tie as he pulled the car door open for her. It was slightly lopsided, probably from when he donned his thick coat. Without thinking she reached up and straightened it, her palms gently placed against his chest as she did so.

Happy with the adjustment, she smiled up at Ben and faltered. He was watching her as she fixed his tie, something burning in his eyes. Rey wasn’t sure but she was scared to move, as if it would break the moment. She couldn’t keep her gasp to herself when Ben started to lean forward, lips brushing against her cheek. “I hope you have a lovely night, Reyna,” he whispered in her ear.

Rey shivered. “Thank you, Ben. I hope I don’t make a fool out of you.”

Pulling back, Ben’s eyes softened. “I won’t let anything happen to you.” As if catching himself, he stiffly walked to the other side of the car. “We should be there in just under an hour.”

Their journey was in silence. Whether it was a comfortable or tense silence, Rey wasn’t sure. She snuck glances in his direction, not wanting to be caught staring. The half-moon peeked from the clouds and illuminated his profile in a way that Rey found magical. To be dressed up and accompanying a man who she had grown to trust was all too surreal for her. Rey scarcely believed how much her life had changed in the span of a few months.

When they arrived, Rey moved to open her door but found it was being pulled open by a footman. She bowed her head politely and didn’t miss the surprised look that crossed the man’s face. Brushing past him, Rey quickly hurried to Ben who waited at the base of the steps that led to the large expansive manor. At his questionable look, Rey elaborated. “I keep forgetting that it’s not common for people to not rely on footmen like you do.”

“Yes, it’s a shame that the people here don’t share the same views as I do. Ready?” Ben offered his arm.

Rey had to squint at the bright lights that shone from the chandeliers that hung in the foyer of the manor. Hoping her eyes would adjust to the brightness, she made out a figure swiftly making their way towards them. Ben dropped his arm, his fingers brushing against Rey’s before he pulled away completely to bow politely at the newcomer.

“Dooku.”

“Ben Solo. The man I’ve heard _so_ much about! It is _such_ a pleasure for you to be joining us at last!” Rey grimaced inwardly at the phony smile that was plastered on the man’s face. Dooku was an aged man, both his hair and his facial hair pure white, and maturity lines marred his face. He turned to Rey, eyebrow raised sardonically. “And who is this _lovely_ young lady?”

“Reyna Kenobi. We’ve known each other for quite some time,” introduced Ben as Rey bowed in a similar manner.

“Is that so? My, I could hardly believe my ears when I was told that Ben Solo would be attending my gala, let alone be bringing company. The rumours about you must be false after all.”

“Rumours?”

“That you’ve gone down the path of celibacy.”

“Ah. Well as you can see, they are nothing but rumours.”

Dooku smiled tightly. “We shall see. Come, so many are just _dying_ to meet you.”

Rey gave Ben a reassuring nod as he was led away, leaving Rey to trail behind him less urgently. She slowly walked towards the ballroom, careful not to stumble in her new footwear. It was a normal thing for women to wear such dangerous shoes. When Rey first slipped her foot into a pair of heels, she had fallen flat on her face. She had improved since then, steadily walking without the need to hold onto anything or look down at her feet, but she had practiced on carpet. The manor was all marble floors and shiny surfaces. She was confident she would not fall, but she was still wary.

Entering the main ballroom, Rey was blinded by the sheer amount of colors present: reds, golds, greens, blues, and yellows; from flowers to dresses to even the food being served, she had to refrain from staring at all the beauty. The foyer opened to two sets of stairs, each leading in opposite directions but arriving at the vast ballroom below. As Rey leaned on the banister that lined the landing, her eyes drawn to the large chandelier that hung high above the ballroom floor. Thin cylinders of brass hovered around each globe with jagged crystals of varying sizes hanging throughout the chandelier. The room was bathed in a warm glow from the chandelier with specks of bright light from the crystals falling over the people below. Rey inhaled softly, heart tugging with nostalgia at the sight of brass.

“What _are_ you doing?”

Rey snapped back to reality and saw a lady climbing the stairs, her dark purple gown trailing behind her as she stopped in front of Rey. She had short silver-blond hair, pale skin, and icy blue eyes. The dark makeup that lined her eyes and painted her lips was so alluring that even Rey could find her attractive. “I’m just admiring the decorations.”

“Hmm, it’s subpar, at best. After all, they’re allowing someone as silly as _you_ into this function. Your mannerisms give you away, girl. Who did you have to pay or sleep with,” the unknown lady laughed at her own insinuation, “to get an invite?” As Rey opened her mouth in protest, the lady held her hand and cut her off. “Ah, ah! Don't even try to argue with me, girl. You’ll only make a fool of yourself and I can always tell when I'm in the presence of someone inferior. Unlike _him_!” The lady gasped and pointed at the floor below. “My, oh my. Is that Ben Solo? There with Count Dooku? I couldn’t believe it when I heard he would be attending. I thought it to be a hoax.”

Rey could tell the lady held Ben in high regard, the hitch in her voice and the twitch of her hand towards the bannister was enough for Rey to see that she was itching to lean over the railing to get a closer look. Like a child. It was painful to witness, but she kept her mouth shut.

“Can you even imagine having such a fine specimen as your own? Come, girl, I’m feeling generous. Let me show you how _real_ Bluebloods play.” Rey wanted to gag at the sweetness in the lady’s voice.

“Count Dooku! Care to introduce us?” The lady sidled up to the two men, rudely interrupting their conversation.

“Ah, of course, Ventress. Ben Solo, this is one of the esteemed members of the Coruscant Society, Baroness Asajj Ventress. Ventress, maybe you can help sweeten the pot and convince Lord Solo to join us?” Dooku smiled, stepping aside to allow Ventress join them, but ignored Rey’s presence.

“Lord Solo, it is a joyous occasion to meet you at last. Here at the Coruscant Society, we accept none but the finest of applicants from the highest levels of society. Everyone here contributes influence, creating jobs and setting an example for Bluebloods alike. We take immense pride in our membership here.”

As Ventress spoke with her nose tilted upwards, Ben’s eyes flickered at Rey who stood just beyond their small circle. He crooked a brow, as if asking how she came into the presence of Ventress. Rey shrugged and snagged a glass from a passing butler.

“As you can see, membership to the Coruscant Society guarantees quality company. However, a gala such as this is merely part of the selection process. Not everyone here,” Ventress commented as she looked pointedly at Rey, “is part of the Society and should be on their best behaviour. Not to offend anyone.”

Even as the words tumbled from Ventress’s dark red lips, Dooku shot her an alarming look, eyes nervously darting between the two ladies. “Ventress,” he started but was cut off by Ben.

“Baroness, I completely agree with you. We _should_ be setting an example and everyone here _should_ be on their best behaviour. It’s just a shame that your specific views are ones with which I cannot agree. Your rudeness to my partner is insulting and, frankly, I cannot see myself actively joining such a society with such members.” Ben broke away from the pair, putting distance between himself and Dooku, ignoring the man’s floundering attempts to catch his attention.

“ _Partner_?” Ventress said incredibly. “I was not aware that you had settled. Well, where is she? It would be interesting to see the lady who has finally captured Ben Solo’s heart.”

With a grin, Ben brushed past the rigid female and stopped in front of Rey. Rey offered a drink from her glass. Shaking his head, Ben dropped a kiss on Rey’s forehead and placed his hand on the small of her back. “Are you enjoying yourself?”

“Hmm,” Rey hummed. “Not particularly. This event is _subpar_ after all.” She smiled at Ben, trying her best to stop her smile from widening at the redness that crept onto Ventress’s face. “I think a dance would be in order to lift my spirits.”

“Of course.” Ben took the glass from Rey’s fingers, passing it to Ventress who continued to gape at them.

“Y-You’re Ben Solo’s _partner_?”

“Oh yes. I’m sorry, I tried to introduce myself earlier but you simply would not hear it. I am Reyna Kenobi and I must agree with Ben.” Ventress twitched at Rey’s informal use of his name. “This gala is a nice reminder to not join these societies.”

The final breaking point was when Rey bowed at Ventress and Dooku before taking Ben’s hand, leading him towards the dance floor. From the corner of her eye, she saw color blossom on Ventress’s face, rage morphing and pulling at her features. She was far from attractive now.

As she made her way to the dance floor, she heard muttering whispers around her.

“A Kenobi? I thought they had become recluses.”

“Did he really just allow her to _bow_?”

“She seems rather odd if you ask me. Bowing like a gentleman rather than curtseying like a lady.”

“They seem to match in personalities.”

“Is she _pulling_ him to the dance floor?”

Entering the dance floor, Rey faced Ben, both bowing respectfully. Ben took her hands and waist in his, bodies flush against each other, and started twirling to the music.

“I’m sorry if I embarrassed you,” whispered Rey. She looked just beyond his shoulder and saw men and women whispering to each other, hands covering their mouths as if it could hide what they were discussing.

Shaking his head subtly, Ben murmured, “Don’t apologise. It was not my intention to join this charade they call a _society_. Just enjoy yourself tonight.”

Despite seeing the pointed looks directed at her, she couldn’t bring herself to care. His voice in her ear was like honey, thick and rich, soothing her soul of her fears and reservations. Her eyes drifted shut, surrendering her complete trust to Ben, letting his movements guide her as they spun around in unison.

"It's a shame though,” Rey commented. Ben looked down at Rey in question. "This place is unlike anything I've ever seen. The colours and bright lights and the sheer amount of green and unlimited food they have. To have something so beautiful and not appreciate it."

As if to reiterate, Rey watched as a man to the side of the hall spat whatever food he had put in his mouth, grimacing as if his precious body was tainted.

"Do you find this place desirable?"

"Desirable? No. I have no use for such a vast space. I'm just saddened by its occupants."

The song came to an end and as the women around them curtsied to their partners, Ben and Rey bowed to each other as if they were equals. When dinner was announced, Rey laid her hand on his arm and walked with him towards the dining hall. As they crossed the threshold, Ben ran his thumb over her knuckles, drawing figure-8 patterns over her skin.

They kept to themselves throughout the meal until someone asked her how she found Coruscant. Swallowing her bite and dabbing the corner of her mouth, Rey searched for the right words. “It’s different from Corellia, but there are things that are similar. For example, the chandelier that hangs over the main hall. The brass cylinders around the light globes are reminiscent of the different districts we have.”

The lady who initiated the conversation laughed. “Ah, yes! Your middle and lower districts! I think Count Dooku keeps that horrid chandelier around as a reminder of how far we have come as a society.”

Rey felt her smile slip from her face. “Reminder?”

Leaning over, the lady whispered wickedly. “Of what we have expelled and should never return.”

“I don’t follow,” Rey said slowly, brows furrowed.

The lady pulled back and let out a laugh that made Rey cringe inwardly. The man next to the lady guffawed. “We used to be similar to Corellia with our own districts and walls to separate ourselves from scum, but then we realised that it’s far easier to manage the city if they just weren’t there.” The man let out a scoff as if the memory of the city’s past burdened him. “I can’t even imagine the pain of having to inhabit the same city as _those_ people. To see them polluting the air with their archaic machinery.”

“They can’t afford anything better. They don’t have the means to live a better life.” Rey felt her hands go limp at the man’s words. Her other arm had slipped from the table and dangled by her side.

The man let out a raucous laugh that made nearby Bluebloods look at them inquisitively. “We used to have the same thinking and left them alone, but the space their machines and their sad homes took up was unacceptable. No, it’s much better that they are not in Coruscant anymore and it won’t be long until Corellia catches on as well.” With that, the exchange was over. The couple turned to other diners and struck up new conversation, leaving Rey feeling numb. She resumed her meal with the air of indifference around her.

It didn’t take long for Rey to tune out the hushed murmurs around them. The Bluebloods kept to themselves for the rest of the meal, watching Rey closely for any slip ups during dinner. By all appearances, Rey was the perfectly bred high born, but she felt the opposite inside. A bump to her side drew her eyes to the side. She noticed Ben watching her from the corner of her eye. Their fingers brushed against each other as they dined, Ben giving the support she needed but not giving anything for the other guests to gossip about.

Once their meal was over, everyone was invited to either return to the ballroom or the lounge for after dinner drinks. Unsure which option to choose, Rey looked at Ben for guidance.

“Let’s dance for the remainder of our time here, maybe get some fresh air and go for a walk in the estate gardens,” said Ben, taking her hand in his to help her up from her chair.

“That sounds lovely,” Rey replied, relishing at warm feel of his hands against hers. She needed to get away from them. Once in the safety of the dance floor and flush against Ben, Rey whispered into his shoulder. “They’re monsters.”

“They are,” Ben agreed. “Coruscant got rid of their districts long before I came to Corellia. Like Corellia, their lower districts resided in the same space as the Bluebloods before the Bluebloods realised that the lower districts could not benefit them in any way and tired of their presence.”

“Will the same happen to Corellia?”

“Honestly, I don’t know. I source and fund a lot of businesses in the middle district so for now, Corellia’s Bluebloods won’t disrupt the district system.”

“I hope so,” she murmured, resting her head on his shoulder.

“Try to enjoy the rest of the night. Don’t worry about Corellia. I’m slowly handling the situation.”

Rey nodded and let her body unwind to the golden lights and soft music. They were into their third dance of the night together when Count Dooku interrupted them. “Lord Solo, if I may steal your partner for this one dance?” he asked politely. With so many people watching, there was no reason to decline. Ben turned to Rey to see how she felt, brow raised in question.

Her eyes darted between the two males before she sighed softly. “I don’t see any harm in one dance.”

Dooku slid between the two, Ben retreating to the sidelines as the new piece of music began.

“How are you enjoying your evening, Miss Kenobi?”

“Other than that rather unfortunate misunderstanding at the beginning of the night, very well, thank you.” Her eyes flickered to Ben every now and then, feeling unease from Dooku’s touch. It was unfamiliar and not as warm as Ben’s.

“So, Lord Solo has matched with a Kenobi. I must admit, I am surprised you would agree to come, what with your family not being seen in thirty years.”

“Well, I’m rather confused as to why it would be any of your business. Ben asked me to accompany him as his partner.  He didn’t want to seem rude when everyone was under the impression he was to attend.” Rey noticed a butler come up to Ben and whisper something in his ear. Annoyance crossed his face as he followed the butler without a further glance in her direction.

“So you are _not_ actually together with Lord Solo.” Dooku leaned even closer to Rey.

Rey inhaled sharply and leaned as far back as her the dance allowed. “Now, I never said that. You’re putting words in my mouth, Count Dooku.”

“I am rather curious of the circumstances of how you met him. From what I understand, Lord Solo does not mingle or interact with just _anyone_.”

“Well, I’m not anyone,” she scoffed lightly.

“I can see that. It’s almost shocking.” Rey tilted her head at his words. “The audacity that you exude. He has no sense of etiquette so it’s understandable that he would choose a… _girl_ …who ignores traditions.”

Rey stopped and let go of the man, ignoring the dancing bodies around them. She felt disgusted and insulted. She may not have been of noble birth, but Ben was and Dooku’s words were degrading. “I’m happy that we are not the same and that Ben is who he is. I can sleep with ease at night knowing that he will always be the honest man I know. But you, Count Dooku, have gone from praising him to dragging his name through the mud.”

Without excusing herself, Rey spun on her heel and gracefully left with her head held high.

She was furious. She managed to make it to an empty hallway before her posture crumbled, running her hand angrily through her hair. Popping her head into the lounge, Rey looked around for Ben but the various pairs of eyes that swivelled in her direction were not the dark ones she sought.

Just as her shoulders drooped dejectedly, she heard a muffled noise that drew her towards another hallway. Hiding behind the corner, she spied Ben and Ventress together. His back was towards her but she noticed his hair was tousled, the tips of his slightly reddened ears poking through the dark locks.

"Don't come near me again." Ben's voice was low. If an eavesdropper were unfamiliar with how he spoke, they would have missed it, but not Rey. Not when the same voice murmured next to her every day, teaching and helping her.

"It's only a matter of time, _Ben,_ " Ventress purred, half laid on his shoulder.

Ben merely shook his shoulder free and brushed past her. Once he left, Ventress caught Rey’s eye and smiled, moving to approach her but Rey ducked away before she could. It felt like her lungs were filled with water, air could not seem to enter her system fast enough. She didn’t care if the people tried to call out to her, or if she accidentally bumped shoulders as she tried to weave her way through the crowds.

Finally reaching the balcony, Rey moved to the edge, fingers wrapping around the railing and letting the cold night air relax her body. This whole night was a farce, a charade, so why should Rey care if Ventress showed interest in Ben? She was sure that Ben would not reciprocate her feelings but Rey thought back to his appearance.

His body was rigid and normally, his hair would be perfectly in place, covering his ears, but when she saw the couple in the hallway, Ben’s hair was dishevelled with his ears exposed. They were tinged red.

Rey shifted her weight onto her hands, her shoulders blades jutting upwards as she flopped her head tiredly. It was not her business who vied for Ben’s attention, much less if he actually responded in a similar fashion. No, it wasn’t her business.

“My, oh my, Miss Kenobi. Didn’t your parents ever teach you that it’s rude to _spy_?”

Her skin prickled as Ventress sauntered up to her, joining Rey at the bannisters. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“It’s also not nice to _lie_. But I understand, it’s _hard_ to grasp that _Ben_ is not the man you assumed him to be.” Ventress smiled slowly, elbow propped against the handrail as her cheek was held against her hand.

“Please do not misunderstand my actions, Baroness. I merely felt that the gala was becoming too crowded for my liking and that fresh air was in order.” Rey kept her eyes trained ahead of her, aimlessly looking at the darkness that stretched for miles.

“Oh, are you feeling faint? Let me get you a drink to help you.” Rey wanted to gag at the sickly kindness that rolled off Ventress’ tongue. “Here.” Ventress handed her a tall glass that held amber liquid, an identical one in her other hand. “This should clear your head.”

Rey nodded in thanks and took a sip under Ventress’ watchful eye. Rey recoiled at the bitter taste, missing the glint that shone in the pale lady’s eyes.

“Oh no, is this the first time you’ve had Corellian whiskey? My, that is rather unusual.” Rey side eyed her as Ventress placed a bony hand on her chest in shock. “All Bluebloods experience this fine beverage as part of their coming of age ceremony. You _do_ know that, right?”

“Of course.” Rey brought the glass to her lips. “I just haven’t become acquired to the taste yet,” she murmured as she tipped her head back, downing the rest of the amber liquid in one go. The fluid burned her throat and made her nostrils flare. As she forced herself to swallow, she felt a warmth spread across her cheeks and head becoming dizzy. She held onto the balcony railings for support and breathed the cold air in desperation. She vaguely heard a soft tut next to her before she felt something run down her cheek.

“Such a young specimen. I can understand why Ben would want you, but remember, _little girl_ , I always get what I want,” Ventress whispered harshly as she dug her nail into Rey’s cheek, pushing further and further into her flesh.

“Ventress!”

Ventress abruptly dropped her hand and pulled away from the younger girl at the sound of Dooku’s commanding voice. Rey watched the older woman stroll towards the bright lights, not even acknowledging the men who stood in the archway as she passed them.

“The night has been…eventful, Count Dooku. I believe it is time for us to bid our farewell,” said Ben politely, taking off his grey suit jacket and moving to drape over Rey’s shivering shoulders.

“Of course, Lord Solo. Have a pleasant trip back to Corellia. Farewell, Miss Kenobi.” Dooku didn’t wait for a response from Rey and left the two alone.

Ben rubbed her arms, hoping to stop the shivering. “Rey, what did she do to you?”

“Nothing, Master Solo,” Rey mumbled, cradling her forehead in her fingers in hopes that her head would stop spinning.

Not missing the formality in her voice, Ben wrapped his arm around her and directed them towards the set of stairs that led around to the front of the manor. As they wandered through the gardens, Ben kept Rey close to his chest. He wanted her to see how beautiful the gardens were at night, but knew that she was in no condition to appreciate the gesture.

The drive home was made in silence, with Ben glancing over at Rey every now and then to see if she had fallen asleep. The whole way, Rey’s eyes were barely open but she was awake. Her head felt like there was a haze or that there was a net around her mind, trapping her with thoughts that she would not think otherwise. She waited, and hoped, that Ben would mention his encounter with Ventress. She had no right to know but she held her breath anyway, praying that Ben would tell her.

When they pulled up to the familiar house, Rey was put out. Sleep could not come sooner. She could just make out the hands of the exposed gear clock on the dashboard, noting that they had arrived home at an early hour of the morning.

As Rey trailed behind him, Ben unlocked the door and guided her in. Before he could properly remove his large outer coat, Hux stepped from the shadows. “You didn’t need to stay awake to welcome us home.”

Hux’s eyes flickered to the girl that almost looked like she was about to collapse. “I’m just doing my job, sir.”

There was a long pause before Ben spoke again. “Is there a problem?” It was a statement more than a question.

Folding the black outer coat over his arm, Hux bowed politely. “No, sir.”               

Ben dismissed him with a wave and helped Rey up the stairs. She was vaguely aware of what was happening around her and would normally take note of Ben’s conversation with Hux, but in her state, she just wanted to get to her bed.

Without stripping off her dress, she crawled under her sheets and snuggled into softness, eyes falling shut and mind drifting into nothingness. Before she surrendered her consciousness completely, she felt a featherlike touch against her lips. It was soft and gentle, but before she could try to pry her eyes open to investigate, her body relaxed completely and delivered her to the land of slumber.

 


	12. Chapter 12

_Challenges are what make life interesting and overcoming them is what makes life meaningful. –Joshua J. Marine_

 

Chapter Eleven

 

When she awoke the next day, Rey had put all thoughts of Ben and Ventress out of her mind and was determined to go about her day as if the gala never happened. The charade was over and it was time to return to reality. She still knew her place and that wasn’t as Ben’s partner. To deter herself from entertaining that niggling feeling at the back of her brain and the bottom of her stomach, she addressed Ben differently when she saw him next.

“Good morning, Master Solo,” she said as she laid his morning tea on his study table.

Ben looked at her sharply. “‘Master Solo’?” he parroted.

Nodding, Rey prepared his tea to his liking before bowing politely. When she looked up from her bow, she was met with a cold stare. “Thank you, that is all. Dismissed.”

Annoyance filled her as she met his frosty demeanour with formalities. She no longer referred to him as ‘Ben’ and he rarely spoke to her. Even when dinner was done and they met in the library afterwards, he merely left books for her to read before retreating to his study to complete his work.

Rey couldn’t deny that it hurt. It felt like her chest was being gouged with a dull object and she could not fathom why. She continued to tell herself to ignore it all; just be grateful that she was fed regularly with a roof over her head, but it still stung. She would have confronted him, except who was she to pry in Ben’s personal affairs? She could not believe that it would ever be her place, so she went through each day as if the past months never happened.

Maz had shot her worried looks while Hux seemed to be smug. Either way, she ignored their curious looks and directed all her energy to completing her duties.

Days became weeks and eventually, Rey got tired of reading in the library alone. There was no point in sitting in a room that only reminded her of what she used to have. She missed the sound of Ben’s smooth voice, how he used to tell her little stories that amused him or something interesting that had happened to him that day. Now, she merely took whatever book she desired to read and withdrew into her room. Over time, the fire no longer needed to be lit in the library.

She tried to not let her sullen mood get the best of her, but her tight smile never met her eyes. It wasn’t until a month later when a genuine smile tugged on her lips.

Fastening her cloak around her, she turned around to see Maz ushering Hux towards her. “Dear, Hux has graciously decided to accompany you to the markets today. It is quite frigid these days and I have a few extra things on the list today. Just hand them over to Hux when you’ve made your purchases.”

Side-eyeing Hux, Rey nodded reluctantly and the couple made their way towards the markets. As lonely as it sounded, Rey cherished her small moments of solitude from the familiar confines of the house. She would always take the long route to the markets and, if she had time, she would cross into the lower districts, desperate to see the streets she had once called home. In all the times she was able to visit the slums, she had never once came across anyone from Plutt’s gang. The first few times she didn’t see anyone, she chalked it up to just missing them. However, after a month and without a single sighting, Rey couldn’t help but wonder what happened to them. Maybe they had moved locations? Maybe Plutt really packed up and left the city for good, taking everyone with him. It was like the slums had changed drastically in the time she was gone. Rey felt even more alone when she realised this.

Now with Hux in tow, Rey took the quickest route to the markets. She knew that the butler would not waste his breath with small talk so she was surprised when he spoke. “What happened that night?”

Rey paused mid step, only a few metres from the market. “What do you mean?”

Hux fixed his steel gaze on her. “The night of the gala. Did your plan not succeed?”

“Our plan worked fine. We made an appearance and I don’t believe they will bother Master Solo any further. I hope.” Rey muttered the last bit under her breath.

“No, I mean,” Hux started, taking hold of Rey’s arm and preventing her from moving towards the markets. “Your intentions to him. Did it not work out in your favour?” Rey ripped her arm from his hold, disgusted at what he was insinuating.

“I have no intentions towards him, Hux.”

“Good. He doesn’t need such pathetic distractions.” Hux pushed past Rey but her hand shot out and grabbed his sleeve roughly.

“Wot is yer problem?” Rey hissed, her Basic slipping in aggravation.  

“My _problem_ ,” he jeered. “Is that you are _not to be trusted_.”

“ _Wot_?”

“Your foul mood just confirms it. Master Solo did not reciprocate your feelings that night. If anything, he probably exposed your true self and is disgusted with what he found.”

Rey rolled her eyes at the tale he was spinning. “Okay, if that’s so then why am I still working for him? Hmm?”

“You know him. He wouldn’t be so heartless to toss a _woman_ on the streets. He just pities you.”

Rey could not even bring herself to be affected by the spiteful words. They were so false and she wondered how the butler’s mind worked. He obviously didn’t know all the facts and filled in the missing blanks himself. The story he was committed to believing was so outrageous that Rey would have taken it as a joke.

Ignoring him, Rey strode towards the markets, unwilling to hear any more of Hux’s farfetched ideas. Passing a nearby paper stand, the headline caught her eye, making Rey stop and grab the paper urgently. The shopkeeper yelled at her angrily, demanding credits, which she handed over absentmindedly. Her eyes were glued to the pages of the newspaper, the bold headline across the front making her heart beat loudly in her chest.

 

> _ Asajj Ventress found dead in Coruscant home _
> 
> _Chairwoman of The Coruscant Society, Baroness Asajj Ventress, was found hanging by a bedsheet secured at the ceiling lamp, a chair kicked over just below her feet. There were no substances found in her system and no suicide note has been found, according to authorities._
> 
> _“It is a sad time for everyone in Coruscant. Asajj Ventress was a kind and loving member of society and will be sorely missed. There was no indication that she was unhappy in any way, so I propose an alternate notion: this was not a suicide, but a homicide,” Count Dooku, chairman of The Coruscant Society, stated._
> 
> _Initial reports say that there was no struggle seen at the Coruscant property. There has also been no unknown fingerprints or evidence to support the claim. Count Dooku is said to be working with Coruscant authorities to bring serial killer Kylo Ren, who is believed to be the culprit, into custody._
> 
> _More on Kylo Ren, his victims, suspected victims and possible copycat killers on pages…_

Rey was shocked. It would be surprising if she really did kill herself, but if it was the work of a serial killer…

Flipping through the newspaper, she landed on a two page spread dedicated to Kylo Ren. Along with a long list of names and their causes of death was a large centrefold picture of a man, dressed in black robes and a black helmet covering his face. The image looked blurred, as if it was taken quickly and hidden from sight. Scratching her head mentally, she vaguely remembered hearing that name in passing. Trying to pinpoint where, Rey growled in annoyance when Hux rudely snatched the paper from her hands, looking over the story that was open.

“Kylo Ren?” Hux looked at Rey unimpressed. “If they think it’s a Kylo Ren murder then they should give up while they’re ahead.”

Rey’s eyebrows rose. “What do you mean?”

“Well, there’s not a great deal of information on him, but people speculate that he’s been around for around ten years. In the ten years he’s been killing only one proper sighting has been confirmed, with this picture to prove it. Authorities, however, haven’t been able to see a pattern with his killings. They seem to be sporadic and completely random. The only thing the victims seem to have in common are they’re Bluebloods and it’s usually discovered afterwards that they’re never morally upstanding citizens.” He handed back the newspaper to Rey. “Before there was confirmation of his existence, I think they just gave the name ‘Kylo Ren’ to unsolved murder or suicide cases that didn’t add up. But when there was an actual sighting of the man, it terrified everyone. No one thought he was actually real, so the Security Force became paranoid that they willed him into existence,” Hux said, shaking his head slightly before losing interest in the fabled serial killer.

When it was evident that Rey was too busy reading the article, Hux left to complete the shopping himself. She trailed behind him, eyes focussed on the different profiles of the deceased. In the corner was the image of a pale old man, balding with sunken features.

 

> _Mal Snoke – deceased at age 60, brutally murdered in his Corellia townhouse, was a businessman and financial advisor who dealt in estates. On the road to wealth, unfortunately his life was cut short and it was revealed that he had forged documents that would allow him to seize and claim properties…_

Rey wasn’t able to finish the small brief before someone bumped into her leg. She knew that bump. After all, she had done the same act many times in her youth. Seeing a flash of orange through the crowds, Rey needled her way through, cutting through alleys that served as shortcuts to wherever the familiar orange would end up.

“BB!”

The small boy with wild orange hair stopped short of climbing a nearby wall to escape and turned around in surprise. “Rey!” The boy beamed and jogged up to her. “I didn’t realise that it would be you I was picking from!” Grinning, he reached into his pocket to take out her purse, only to pat an empty pocket. “Wha?”

Rey held up her own coin purse. “Don’t steal from a thief. I’ll always be one step ahead of you.” Unable to stop herself from grinning, she ruffled his head and pulled him into a tight hug. “Where have you been? I tried looking for you in the lower ring but it seemed like Plutt’s moved everyone again?”

BB looked at her weirdly. “Rey, I thought you heard?”

“Heard what?” She couldn’t stop the sinking feeling that brewed in her stomach.

“Plutt’s been missing for months. We assumed one of the rival gangs finally had enough and ended him but no one has owned up to it yet. Most of us have moved onto other gangs or left Corellia entirely.”

“And you?”

“I’m making do, but it won’t be long until I leave as well. But look at you Rey! When you first left, Plutt gloated about how you would be dead in a week! You’ve changed so much I could barely recognise you! And you speak Basic too!”

“Well, I was rather fortunate to be in the situation I’m in now. I’m treated _far_ better than I ever was.” And she was. Rey’s eyes softened as month-old memories started bubbling towards the surface.

_Rey laughing in the library in the first months of her employment, her ribs hurting from the anecdote Ben told her…_

_”You look like such a scruffy-lookin’ nerfherder.”_

_“What did you call me?!”_

_Rey grinned at the scrunched up look on Ben’s face, pointing at the chaotic mess that was his hair…_

_The rich bark of laughter that surprised Rey, the small bread item – a ‘scone’ – plucked from her fingers._

_“Please, no one eats it like a sandwich, Rey.”_

_Ben’s face relaxing as they discussed a variety of topics, ranging from whatever book Rey just finished, to how Ben’s business deals were faring, to things of inconsequential nature._

_Ben’s smooth voice whispering in her ear. “Your dancing seems to have improved.”_

_Her face becoming warm, warmer than it should have with the fireplace burning the background._

“Rey!” She snapped out of her reverie at the harsh shout of her name in the distance. Turning urgently to BB, she found he was already halfway up the building to the side.

As BB jumped to the next building, he called down before disappearing from sight. “I hope you have a good one Rey! Looks like you found someone who’s made you happy!”

The heavy hand clapped on her shoulder spun her around to reveal an angry Hux. “What are you doing back here?!”

“I-I-A pickpocket tried to take my purse! But don’t worry, I got it back!” She forced a smile on her face and held up the small pouch, shaking the coins inside for good measure.

“Should we report it to the authorities?”

“There’s no need to, Hux. Have you gotten most of the items on Maz’s list? Come on, let’s get the rest! She’s waiting for us after all!” Rey desperately pulled Hux towards the bustling streets of the market place, hoping that he didn’t overhear the words she exchanged with BB.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 'Mal' means 'evil' in Spanish :) ~~according to google translate~~


	13. Chapter 13

_Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value. –Albert Einstein_

 

Chapter Twelve

 

The ingredients they  fetched were made into a rich fish stew, Master Solo’s favourite, Maz mentioned as she cooked. The elderly woman had commented that Ben had been looking under the weather lately and decided to make his favourite dish in hopes that it would help. Hux was usually the one who waited on him, delivering and clearing his dishes when he was done. However, before Hux even had a chance to _think_ about bringing up the mouth-watering stew, Maz instructed Rey to instead.

Casting a wary look at Maz and avoiding Hux’s glare, Rey dutifully took the tray and carefully went upstairs to Ben’s study, ensuring there was nothing spilt along the way. Knocking politely, she waited for a brief moment before pushing the door open.

“Hux, just leave it there and come back later. I’ll get to it eventually,” Ben said without lifting his head from his documents.

“Sorry, Master Solo, but I’ve been instructed to give you your dinner this evening.” Rey kept her head down and placed the tray where he had blindly pointed at earlier. As she quickly bowed to announce her departure, she noticed Ben’s piercing gaze, brow furrowed as if trying to solve a puzzle.

“Please stay,” he paused, and added softly, “Rey.” With her hand hovering just above the handle, Rey turned around slowly trying to assess if she was going to step into a trap. Unable to think of a reason to decline, she lowered herself in the seat across from him. The same seat she had sat in many months ago.

They sat in silence, the crackling of the fire filling the void. She held her clasped hands in her lap, her thumb flicking over her knuckles nervously. She looked everywhere in the room, except for Ben, knowing that he was still staring at her.

“How have you been?”

Rey stubbornly withdrew her eyes from the ugly wallpaper and forced them on Ben. “Fine.”

Ben sighed tiredly. “What happened to us?”

“There was never an ‘us’, Master Solo.”

“I didn’t mean it in that way…” He looked like he wanted to say something else but clamped his mouth shut with a soft click of his teeth.

The uncomfortable silence that fell around them again was too much for Rey to bear. “Did you hear about Ventress?”

“Yes, I heard this morning. Her death is rather, well, unfortunate.” A snort left Rey before she could stop it. “And what is that supposed to mean?” he remarked snidely.

“Unfortunate? Please, Master Solo, you don’t need to cover your feelings with yer pretty words.” Her heart raced at the thinly veiled accusation. Even her Basic was slipping.

“You’re being a bit hypocritical aren’t you, _Miss Kenobi_?”

Her foot twitched and kicked the side of the desk. “Don’t call me that.”

“Well, something has obviously been on your mind since that night, so why don’t we go back and _pretend_ like we did.” Ben stood up and rounded his desk until he was in front of her. “What is it that _ails_ you, _Lady Kenobi_?” he mocked.

Jumping to her feet, she stabbed his chest with her finger. “ _I said don’t call me that!”_

“Why? It’s obvious that there’s been a misunderstanding.”

“Yes, there has been!” The look of triumph on his face made Rey steam on. “I actually believed you, yanoe dat?”

Ben groaned in frustration and ran his hand through his hair. “Kriff Rey, please don’t go back to that _talk_.”

“Ah-ha!” She folded her arms across her chest. “Yer true self is exposed!”

“ _What true self_?!” he asked incredulously.

“Ya say ye don’ care ‘bout different statuses, dat ye think we should be treated the same way but look at yer! You’ve been treatin’ me differen’ since dat night ‘cos you’ve realised that, yes, _I’m just your maid_.”

Ben grabbed her shoulders and shook her lightly. “Rey, I’m being serious. _What are you talking about?_ ”

“ _You and Ventress_!”

“ _What_?” Ben dropped his hands to his sides. “There is no ‘me and Ventress’.”

“I saw you two. On the night. Together,” Rey clarified, controlling her accent once again. “Your hair was messy and she looked smug. And she said-”

“Stop.” Ben cut her off before she could finished her sentence. “Don’t ever believe anything that Bluebloods say, much less _Ventress_. Why do you think I didn’t make you wear red on that night when _everyone else_ did?”  Ben moved to where his stew was still steaming and held it in his hands as he sat on the edge of his desk once more. “Red lips always lie.”

Rey looked ashamed. “I-I thought,” she trailed off, biting her lips nervously. “Your ears were red. Your ears only really do that when you’ve been caught unaware.”

Placing the bowl on the surface behind him, Ben slowly moved closer to Rey. “And how would you know this, Rey?”

She quickly looked away, hoping that the heat that spread on her cheeks wasn’t visible. “I notice a lot of things, Ben.”

“Oh, it’s _Ben_ again, is it?” He hovered close to her, tilting his head so she couldn’t avoid his face. “Is that why you started being so formal with me, Rey? Were you jealous?”

Her eyes widened and stared into his, unable to pull away. “No, I was just annoyed,” she denied. “Because it seemed like you could have been interested in Ventress…” she finished, her voice barely audible as if her words might cause him to recoil.

“There was never anything between Ventress and I,” he whispered in a similar fashion. “You don’t need to worry yourself anymore, Rey.”

She watched as he moved his face closer. “I wasn’t worried, Ben…” she trailed off.

“I like it when you call me Ben.” He ghosted his lips across her own, the briefest of touch sending shivers down her spine and her body tremble.

Her lips felt warm, the small puffs of air between them dampening their lips and making her nerves feel like they were on fire. She licked her lips, eyes darting from his lips to his nose to his eyes. When he surged forward, she let her eyes slip shut and tried not to moan as she looped her arms around him, holding onto him with her life.

He kissed her gently, cradling her cheeks in his large hands, the pads of his thumbs rubbing circles against her smooth skin. Their lips slid over each other seamlessly, melding together as if second nature. Rey’s heart beat faster and faster at the feel of his tongue swiping along her bottom lip, his mouth parting slightly to suckle on her lips.

Inhaling deeply through her nostrils, she opened her mouth and let their tongues taste each other. She had never had fish stew before but the saltiness that was still on his tongue was enough for Rey to know how the creamy stew tasted. Desperation started to fill her. With an arm still slung around his neck, her other hand snaked down and fisted his shirt, pulling him roughly against her.

It was an odd feeling rising in her. Her heart seemed to swell at his touch and all the feelings she had repressed came crashing to the surface. A swimming giddiness clouded her mind as the soft noises of their kiss was all she could hear. Her hand moved up from his shoulder to his hair, fingers carding through the black waves that made him impossibly handsome.

Smiling into his lips, Rey reluctantly pulled back. His eyes were dark with lust, face flushed and ears tinged red. He pressed his lips briefly on her nose then softly kissing her cheek before his lips ghosted over her forehead before moving far away from her, the bowl of cold stew in hand. As he drank the soup, the couple stared into the distance distractedly – Ben spooning the creamy stew into his mouth with a faraway look in his eyes, while Rey touched her lips, a blush blooming across her face as she replayed the kiss in her mind.

“Is this, um, allowed?” Rey whispered, eyes downcast as she bit her lip with worry.

“I don’t care if it’s not allowed. _I’m_ allowing it.” Seeing her gnaw on her bottom lip anxiously, he backtracked. “We can… take it slow… if that makes you feel more comfortable?”

Smiling, Rey replied. “Yes, very much. This is all still new to me.”

Moving towards her once more, Ben hovered the palm of his hand over her face before brushing a loose strand from her eyes. Tipping her chin upwards, he leant down to give her lips a quick kiss. “How ever long it takes for you…Rey.”

As his lips lingered on hers, Rey smiled, drunk on his scent. He smelt freshly bathed, like sandalwood and soap. She wanted to hold onto him forever. She wanted to breathe him and kiss him until they couldn’t feel their bodies anymore. Feeling him press against her urgently, Rey pushed him back, keeping him at arm’s length before they both did something they regretted.

“Thank you, Rey,” Ben said breathily, face crimson with embarrassment at how easily undone he became around her.

“I… should get back… to them.” Rey awkwardly waved towards the door and turned around, keeping her back towards Ben. If she remained any longer, she would never leave, a gluttony that was too risky to indulge in completely. Before she left, she quickly turned around to ask for his tray but let out a surprised cry when she noticed he had silently followed her to the door. “Your… tray…”

His breath tickled her face. “Don’t worry about them. I’ll bring it down myself later.”

Nodding, Rey slipped out and shut the door behind her, back pressed against the door as she tried to will for her heart to stop beating traitorously fast. She clutched her chest and inhaled deeply, the silly smile unwilling to leave her face.

“Did he enjoy it?”

Rey almost jumped, body stiffening at the sound of Hux. “W-What?” Did he _already_ know?

“The stew…did he enjoy it?”

“Y-Yes!” She stuttered. “He gives his thanks.” Keeping her eyes on Hux, she saw something flicker across his face before it became stony once more. He nodded and returned downstairs, Rey following closely to throw off any suspicions.

Later that night, her eyes drifted to the clock that hung on the wall of her room. It was getting late, but until a few months ago, she would have spent this time in the library with Ben. Cautiously stepping into the hallway, she quickly padded across the hall to the library, pushing the door open slowly to prevent any creaking.

The fire was lit, the crackling sound like a melody to Rey’s ears. The room was bathed in warm light with a dark shadow casted over the bookshelves. Poking her head in, she saw Ben crouched before the hearth, fire iron in hand and stirring up the firewood. Rey slipped in and browsed through the books, her attention  focused on the man who stalked towards her like she was his prey. She shivered, her stomach twisting and pulling downwards at his nearby presence.

“I’m glad…that you kept reading.”

Plucking a book from the shelf, Rey let out a shaky breath. “Of course. Stay with me?”

“Always.”

Rey stomped down her painfully beating heart and tried to compose herself. As she settled in a nearby armchair, Ben took to the next armchair over with a book in hand and immersed himself in it completely. Rey spied him from the corner of her eye, cursing at him mentally for seamlessly being able to tune out his surroundings. Sighing softly, Rey opened her book and followed suit.

This routine continued for the rest of the week, much to Rey’s pleasure. Brief kisses were stolen in haste or in their time together in the library but, besides that, there none the wiser for their new relationship. Maz seemed to be genuinely happy for the mood changes she observed in Ben and Rey but never commented on it outright. Hux seemed indifferent, never approving or disapproving at her newfound cheeriness.

At least, that was what Rey kept telling herself until the following week. It was an especially cold morning, and for the first time, Maz kept to her bed. Throwing more firewood into the furnace, Rey built up the fire until her room was warm enough to stop Maz from shivering.

“I should at least get up to inform Ben,” Maz said weakly, shuffling wearily under the covers.

“Don’t worry. I’ll let him know. Just rest.”

Surrendering her body to the soul-piercing warmth, Maz snuggled further into the blankets and mumbled as Rey left, “If you need a spare apron…check the basement.”

Rey had never ventured into the basement, never needing to venture to the cold crypt under the house. Her only knowledge of the room was that it had a trapdoor that led to the street and that it was heavily locked from the inside. The chill of the staircase leading downstairs made her body tremble, not from fright but from the biting cold that seemed to nibble on her bones.

Arriving in the basement, Rey noted that it was bathed in darkness. She flicked on the light, and set about looking for a spare apron to use. Maz was tiny and the apron she used was altered specifically for her. There was no way the ties on the back of the apron would even wrap around her waist.

Spying a chest in the far corner, she tried to pry it open but found it clocked. Strangely, the chest seemed like it had been there for years yet there was no layer of dust. Trying to jiggle the lock one more time, she quickly gave up. Normally, she would have looked around for two thin prongs, anything that could serve as a lockpick. However, Rey got to her feet and continued looking for a spare apron. There was no need to rummage through Ben Solo’s belongings. Finding her apron in a tall wardrobe near the base of the stairs, Rey turned around, grin on her lips and she held onto the apron in triumph.

As she turned around to go back to the kitchen to start on breakfast, she dropped the apron in shock.

“Hux! Don’t scare me-” Before she could get the rest of her sentence out, his hand shot out and clamped over her mouth.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~~'red lips always lie' im sorry for being a skrillex weeb~~


	14. Chapter 14

_Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed of an equal or greater benefit. –Napoleon Hill_

 

Chapter Thirteen

 

Rey struggled furiously but that only made Hux pull her against him, her back pressed against his front. His hand was still wrapped over her lips with his other cupping her throat, gently pressing down in warning.

“Did you think I wouldn’t find out? Did you think that you could hide it from me?! _”_ Hux’s harsh whispers in her legs made her kick wildly in panic.

Rey tried to rip out of his tight grip, head flinging from side to side erratically in hopes that she would be able to slip out of Hux’s hold. Unfortunately, wherever Rey tried to fling her body towards, Hux firmly clung to her.

“I saw you, you know,” he continued.

She closed her eyes in dread. She was sure that her relationship with Ben was well hidden, both  staying professional when others were around, or when Ben had to get work done. They _did_ agree to take things slow and it would be silly to cling onto him desperately, as she had seen so many times on the street.

“It took me a while to figure it out. I had seen that boy from somewhere. So I had to dig around a little deeper and then everything _made sense_.” He pulled at her neck angrily.

Rey’s head was swimming. What did he know? What boy? She didn’t understand what he was saying and paused in her struggles momentarily to hear what he was saying.

“Girls in Plutt’s gang are known to be quite… accommodating.”

Her body fell limp as her veins turning to ice. Dread filled her and she felt her skin crawl as his hand moved from her neck and ventured southward. She trembled and clawed at his wandering hand, blood screaming in her ears as he painfully squeezed her breast.

Memories of when she was still with Plutt’s gang came rushing to the forefront of her brain. She always heard strange noises but every now and then, she would hear muffled cries before they were stopped abruptly. Whenever the girls became old enough, the light would disappear from their eyes after their first client. Rey had asked a girl one time, years ago when she had just discovered what was planned for her, why hadn’t the girl just _left_? The girl didn’t answer right away but Rey could see that her will to fight was gone, leaving her a husk of a person, too tired and too weary to try her luck surviving the streets on her own. That was what had caused nine-year-old Rey to run on those cold streets, anger and fear of what her future might become fuelling her, willing her to learn the skills she needed to avoid that fate.

“And before Plutt disappeared and the gang was absorbed into nearby ones, I never got to _try a Plutt girl_.”

Adrenaline coursed through her as she understood exactly what he wanted. Saliva started to leak from her lips as she growled, coating the palm of Hux’s hand and allowing for Rey to shake free. Savagely, she clamped down on the fingers that attempted to silence her once more, her teeth sinking into the flesh as a howl ripped from his throat.

_“You BITCH!”_

Momentarily distracted, Hux was caught off-guard as Rey stomped on his foot and elbowed his ribs. He let go of her immediately, wheezing as he cradled his ribs in pain. She put as much distance between them and tried to look around for a weapon. The look in his eyes were rabid and wild. He licked his lips hungrily. “I’ve never seen a _whore_ fight so hard to get away from a _client_. What are you going to do, huh? Seduce him? Seduce him so you can kill him and take all he has?” He spat at the floor in disgust. “Well, it’s _clearly_ working but, before I leave this place, I _will_ find out what’s so special about you that made him _fall_ so.” An unattractive snarl morphed onto his face. “What kind of magical _cunt_ has made him into the weak man he is now.”

Hux didn’t even see Rey coming. In a blink of an eye, she jumped over the table in the middle of the room and pinned his shoulders to the wall with impossible strength. Fury and rage filled her soul, teeth clenched and grinding against each other as she hissed. “How _fucking dare you_. You don’t know _anything_ about me and if you weren’t such a pathetic _sneak_ , I would snap your neck where you stand.”

Before Hux could snap back, a dark presence in the doorway made them both freeze.

“ **What is happening here?** ”

Ben’s frigid voice caught Rey unaware, eyes widened not only in shock but also with fear that he had gotten the wrong impression. She released Hux and backed off, hands by her side as she glared at Hux, daring him to confess. Her hands were clenched tightly, nails digging into her soft skin of her palm. When neither of them replied, Ben took a slow step into the basement, his shoes echoing off the stone walls.

“Get out.”

Tears stung her eyes as she whirled her head in shock. Ben stared right at her, his dark eyes piercing every fibre in her body. A lump in her throat formed and made her choke. She couldn’t believe that he would actually be telling her to get out. She assumed that he would yell or scream or demand answers, not take what little she had left from her, but his look was swift and defiant. Blinking her tears back, she shuffled towards the staircase but a firm hand clapped onto her shoulder.

“Not you.”

Rey looked up in wonder as she heard Hux splutter behind her. “ _What_?”

“You heard me. Get out. Pack up your belongings and _get out_.”

Ben grabbed the scruff of Hux’s neck and forced him towards the stairs, not caring for the insulted scoff that followed. “Fine! Fine, I’ll leave but not before I have one final word with you. You owe me that much.”

“I will deal with you later,” Ben sneered, eyes trained on Rey as Hux’s angry footsteps faded.

Even though it was just them, Rey still blinked her tears back furiously. Her eyes and nose still stung but she wasn’t sure if it was from the initial panic or the relief that had flooded her when he fired Hux.

“Was what I did right? _Are_ you clouding my judgement or can I trust you?”

Rey placed her hand on his, offering her presence as comfort to something she knew was a difficult decision for him. Hux had worked for him for _years_. He and Maz were the closest thing to a family that he had, but Hux had crossed a line that she knew Ben would not condone. Wanting to spare Ben the details that made her skin crawl, Rey nodded and turned to leave but Ben’s hand caught her wrist, pulling her back. She held her breath as he tilted her head slightly and brushed his fingers over her tender neck. “It’s red,” he murmured, gently caressing the faint marks.

“I’m fine,” Rey whispered softly, pulling from his touch. Her own hands came up to rub her neck, not realising how hard Hux’s hold was. She quickly moved past Ben and ran up the stairs. From the look in Ben’s eyes, Rey did not want to be around when he had a final word with Hux, so she retreated to Maz’s room.

The elderly lady craned her neck when she heard Rey enter.

“What’s happened? I heard some ruckus from the basement. I hope you didn’t knock over anything. Ben always got annoyed when I used to clean the basement. He told me one time that he was paranoid that I would find something that would change my opinion of him. He’s like a son to me, I don’t see how that is possible,” Maz prattled on as Rey stared at the wall, her mind replaying the past hour repeatedly like a nightmare.

“Rey?”

Rey broke from her reverie, swallowing thickly as she clasped onto Maz’s soft hands reassuringly. “Sorry, my head isn’t where it should be.”

“What happened?”

“I…Ben fired Hux.”

She expected something from Maz: an outcry of rage or a shocked gasp, but none came. Rey slid her eyes to her and saw a lady who was sadly, not entirely surprised.

“Hux has been… worried for Master Solo,” explained Maz, sighing deeply as sadness crept into her eyes. “He was here before I even arrived, so to me Hux is the oldest family member Ben’s had. As a result, I believe Hux sees himself as Ben’s protector of sorts. When you first appeared, you shook this house, Rey. Before you, our lives were routine and dreary. When you first came along, I had cackled uglily when I heard that a slip of a girl bested Master Solo and broke Hux’s nose. I was amused and genuinely wanted to meet the spitfire of a girl that had put fire in their eyes.” Maz paused. “Albeit, both for different reasons,” she clarified.

“Different reasons?”

“I was happy for Ben. He only had an old lady and a stickler for rules as family, but _you_ , you brought life to his eyes that I had never seen before. You may have not noticed when you first joined us, but he always watched you. I saw it straight away, and when I commented about it, he did something I had never seen. He blushed. He blushed, as if embarrassed that he was so transparent. Of course, if I noticed, then that meant Hux had as well, and he was not as enthusiastic about Ben’s budding feelings towards you.

“I’ve tried to calm him about it. It worked for the first few months but then the gala came and went, and something in Hux changed. At first, I thought maybe he had feelings towards you as well! I believe Ben thought similar for a while too. Recently, he had confessed to me that he was planning on leaving this house. He told me that he could not stay and see a great man fall because of a _woman_. Needless to say, I was not amused by his wording. I warned him earlier this week to discuss his concerns with Ben but he wouldn’t listen to me. He claimed that Ben, along with me, was blind to your treachery and that he had ‘found the missing piece.”

Rey snorted. “Oh, he wouldn’t listen to reason. He refused to even hear me when he came to the wrong conclusion. If he had checked his facts properly, he would have realised how _wrong_ he was!”

“Indeed! He forgets that none of us hail from a respectable background, and that we all had to do things that we weren’t necessarily proud of,” Maz replied.

“Even if I did earn my living on my back, not that I did, I don’t see how it would be any of his business!” Rey huffed angrily and crossed her arms across her chest.

“He mistook you for _that_?” Maz whispered, scared that Rey’s words would confirm her worries.

“Yes,” Rey hissed. “He, to put it bluntly, tried to force himself on me. Wanted to see what all the ‘fuss’ was about.” She let out a disgusted noise and rubbed her arms, as if she was trying to scrub herself clean of Hux’s touch that lingered in her memory.

Before Maz could reply, a loud ruckus was heard from the foyer. Looking at each other, Rey quickly helped Maz from her bed, kneeling on the floor and offering her back.

“Oh, no, I couldn’t…”

“Please, Maz, even though his behaviour has been completely out of line recently, you know you would want to see Hux one last time before he leaves,” Rey urged.

With a sigh of defeat, Maz carefully climbed onto Rey’s back and was hoisted upwards. Quickly Without wasting time, Rey crept towards the foyer, making sure she kept out of sight.

“You disappoint me, _Lord Solo_ ,” Hux said mockingly. “You may _think_ that you’re better than the Bluebloods, but at least they think with more brain than you ever did!”

“Get. Out,” Ben seethed, brows knitted together as he glared at the ginger-haired man.

“With pleasure. I can’t stand to serve you any longer.”

Without a look casted in the direction where Maz and Rey was watching from, Hux stomped out of their lives, with his clothes hastily stuffed in his satchel and a resounding slam of the heavy front doors.

 


	15. Chapter 15

_There is nothing noble about being superior to some other man. The true nobility is in being superior to your previous self. –Hindu Proverb_

 

Chapter Fourteen

 

A firm knock echoing through the Solo household in the early hours was enough to rouse Rey from her sleep. The sun had not yet completely risen, and there was only a pinkish purple tinge to the skies.

Another knock echoed from the front door and Rey finally pushed herself out of bed, wrapped a robe around her nightgown, and made her way downstairs before the incessant knocking woke Ben or Maz earlier than needed.

Everyone had been sombre since Hux’s abrupt departure. Even though there was a significant tension lifted from their shoulders, a sadness still lingered in the air. Maz was disappointed in the young man’s actions and accusations, always casting a worried look at Rey when she thought she didn’t notice. The topic of her altercation with Hux hadn’t been discussed again, and she was thankful. It wasn’t best to dwell on the past and Rey was no stranger to doing such. After all, she had already wasted years of her life wondering why her parents abandoned her.

Not wanting to linger on unpleasant thoughts, Rey quickly descended down the stairs. As she neared the door, she passed the spot where Ben had once stood, days earlier when he cast Hux aside.

If Rey was worried that Ben would mention him, she didn’t have to. Their days continued like before, except when Ben joined her in their sanctuary that was the library. His shoulders were always rigid until they had settled in their respective chairs, when he finally relaxed. They exchanged light kisses, nothing heated, but work seemed to always draw him away, limiting what little time they had together. He would still join her before bed to read with her, but instead of arriving directly after dinner, an hour or two ticked by before she saw him.

It was fine, of course. The past few days had been stressful for everyone, so some peace and quiet was well deserved.

Finally reaching the door, she cracked it open slightly, hoping that the person had given up and left. Peeking through the small space, she saw a dark skinned man in a clean and crisp white police uniform. “Finn?”

The man looked back at her, a shocked expression mirroring her own. “Rey?”

“W-What are you doing here? How did you find me?”

A look of worry replaced his surprise. “I’m not here for you, Rey. I need to speak with Ben Solo.”

Rey took a step back and took in his new uniform. It wasn’t like any she had seen in Corellia. He had a pressed, clean police suit jacket, like Rey was accustomed to seeing, except there were additional medals that weren’t present on normal officers. There were golden buttons that shined, despite the low morning light, with matching yellow ropes attached to his right breast and shoulder, looping under his arm elegantly. His high collar also had gold lining and as Rey eyed her old acquaintance, she also noticed that his white pants had gold lining running along the side as well.

“What do you want with him? It’s a bit early to make house calls, isn’t it? Last I saw you, you were just a district border guard.”

Finn sighed, his voice tinged with annoyance. “I’m a detective with the Corellian Security Force now. My business with Solo is of a sensitive nature so I insist you wake him. Don’t make this any harder than it should be, Rey.”

Rey remained standing in the doorway. “You’ve changed, Finn.”

“I could say the same about you. I thought you would know better than to mix with people like Solo.”

“And I thought you would one day realise that the Corellian Security Force isn’t as amazing as you believe it to be.”

Despite the fake smile he plastered on his face, Rey saw him clench his hands at his sides. “Rey. Get your Master.”

Rey bristled at the tone of his voice as he said ‘Master’. Matching his abrasiveness, Rey stood her ground. “And what if I don’t?”

Soft footsteps made Rey pause in her argument. She turned around and saw a weary Ben padding down the stairs, his lanky hair typical of when he was roused from his sleep unexpectedly. “Rey, it’s fine. Please make some tea for us. Officer…?”

Rey let the door swing open, giving the detective full view of the tired black haired man.

“ _Detective_ Finn Evans,” Finn introduced, emphasising his rank. “I apologise for calling on you so early, but I would not do so if it was not important. Is there somewhere we can adjourn to?”

“This way. Rey, could you please prepare us some tea? Thank you,” asked Ben, not waiting for a response and leading Finn to the lounge.

She scurried to the kitchen hastily. It felt like time moved excruciatingly slowly as she tapped her foot on the floor, impatiently waiting for the water to boil. Once everything was prepared, she moved to the lounge and almost dropped her tray at the conversation she overheard.

“…he was in your employment last, Mister Solo. His prospective employer said he already had accepted Hux as a butler over a week ago. Hux was scheduled to arrive at his new employer’s residence two days ago but failed to show up. As you are his previous employer, it is only fitting that I question you first,” stated Finn, accepting the tea from Rey and adding the needed milk and sugar. “You may leave us. This is not fitting conversation for maids,” Finn ordered Rey, tilting his head towards the door.

“She will remain,” said Ben steely, anger bleeding into his voice.

Rey tried to catch Ben’s eye to give her thanks but his eyes remained firmly on the detectives’. The sun was slowly rising over the horizon but a blue night hue still remained in the room. Blending into the background, Rey started to build a fire, busying her hands as she listened to the voices behind her.

“Very well.” Finn settled into the seat and folded his hands in his lap. “Explain what caused you to terminate his employment.”

“Simple. He had violated one of the rules I have in place in this home and it resulted in his immediate dismissal. Needless to say, he was not, to put it bluntly, pleased.” Ben took a sip of his tea, eyes still trained on Finn.

The detective hummed thoughtfully. “What could he have done that angered you so? You see, Mister Solo, his new employer has officially reported him as missing. The last known sighting of Mister Armitage Hux is leaving this household, four days ago. My request is very simple, Mister Solo. If I could take a look around your residence for anything out of the ordinary, and then I can be on my way.”

Ben narrowed his eyes. “You may _not_. I do not allow it.”

Finn raised a brow. “If you are truly innocent, then you have nothing to hide.”

Chuckling, Ben raised a hand to stop Finn’s line of thought. “Please do not misunderstand. I have nothing to hide and I am quite cooperative, but there is a time and place for such. You come into my home, uninvited, unannounced, with your thinly veiled accusations, _demanding_ that you are given access to my home. You do not address me by my proper title and have the audacity to order my staff around. No, forgive me Detective, but I do not consent to my house being searched by you.”

“Very well,” Finn sighed, placing his tea cup back on the tray before getting up. “I’m saddened to hear this, Mister Solo. I will simply have to request the Judge to grant me access, if you will not give it to me willingly.”

“Good luck with your endeavours, Detective Finn. I wish you farewell and a pleasant future. I don’t believe we will meet again.”

“Hmm, we shall see.”

With her head bowed, Rey followed the pair closely, quickly walking in front of them to open the door for their guest. Before Finn could cross the threshold, he turned around and sized Ben up.

“I’ve heard rumours about you, _Lord Solo_ ,” he said mockingly. “The mysterious man who appeared in Corellia, with wealth that has made _everyone_ , the poor and Bluebloods alike, vie for your attention. And yet, you only direct your interest in people who you think truly deserve it. For this, I admire you. However, your dislike for Bluebloods is not a secret.”

“What are you insinuating?”

“I’m just stating that I’m starting to see a pattern with you, Solo.” Rey had to strain her ears to hear what was being said. “You may have fooled everyone but I know the truth. I _will_ find the evidence that will convict you for your crimes.”

The sun finally peeked over the tall townhouses, casting its rays through the windows and onto Rey’s eyes. Blinded momentarily, Rey turned her face away and caught a sight she would question later. The sunlight seemed to bathe Ben in a warm light that mixed with his morning facial hair strangely. The sunshine almost made his beard take on a blue hue. Rey would be surprised if Ben’s regrowth of chin hair was actually blue; she always assumed that his hair was black, but now she wasn’t sure.

“I’d like to see you try, Detective Evans,” Ben whispered. He then switched his voice to a higher volume. “It is going to be rather hard to find evidence that does not exist, isn’t it?”

The tension was palpable and unbearable. Thankfully, Finn merely shot him another glare before stiffly leaving the house, sparing a glance at Rey as he left. Once the door was closed, a long sigh was heard from the hallway.

“I thought he would never leave,” Maz commented as she slowly came closer. “Calling on you so early in the morning? It’s simply not done. What did he want, anyways?” she asked gruffly.

“Hux has been missing since I dismissed him. Apparently, he had found a new employer prior to his decision to insult me, and has been reported missing. Since he was last seen leaving this household, I am a prime suspect.” Seeing Rey’s worried face, he swooped her into a warm hug. “Don’t worry, he won’t be bothering us anymore.”

“How can you be so confident?”

“Magistrates and judges dare not involve themselves in Blueblood business. They will leave it solely up to the Corellian Security Force to detain suspects. They will be more than willing to pass fair judgement, provided that the Security Force is _able_ to arrest their suspects. No judge would dare to allow such a search to be conducted on this household. However, I must get ready. I have a long day ahead of me, meetings and the sort, but inform me at once if you see that man again.”

Hastily eating his breakfast Ben rushed out of the door, leaving Rey with an uneasy feeling in her stomach.

It wasn't until days later when Rey was making her run at the markets that she saw Finn again. Just as she placed a carton of eggs into her basket, a slight murmur caught her attention. Turning her head to find the source, Rey saw the familiar face and white and gold uniform. His back was straight and stiff, and everyone moved out of his path eagerly, as if crossing him would cause bad fortune to fall upon them. He didn’t seem phased by the attention he was getting, if anything, he seemed to revel in the respect he was receiving.

Seeing him come towards her made Rey turn around quickly. Giving her thanks to the shopkeeper, Rey tried to walk away from the detective.

“Rey.” There was no friendliness in his voice, only firm command.

She saw a cluster of women whisper harshly to each other, their eyes shooting her conspicuous looks of glee. Not wanting to be part of the district's’ next topic of discussion, Rey turned around and smothered a fake smile onto her face. “Detective Evans,” she greeted, remembering how he introduced himself days earlier. “What a pleasant surprise. What can I do for you?”

“I was wondering if I could have a word with you. If you could please join me for an afternoon tea, I would be most grateful.”

Rey gripped her basket tightly in her hands, channeling her annoyance from her face and keeping her exterior calm. “Of course.”

“Splendid.” Finn took her hand and led her towards a more secluded area of the markets. Pulling out a chair outside a nearby cafe, Finn ushered Rey into the seat and signalled the waiter for two servings of tea.

Rey ripped her hand from his, wiping her palm against her skirt. “Don’t take my hand ever again,” Rey said, perching herself on the edge of the seat with the basket in her lap. She didn’t want to get too comfortable around him, his new uniform and stance causing Rey to be wary.

“Of course,” he agreed as the waiter placed a set of cups and a pot of tea at the table.

“Compliments of the owner, Detective Evans,” the waiter said with reverence. Finn nodded his thanks and waited for them to be left alone before he let the formalities drop, posture still stiff but his voice returning to the casual one she was used to.

“What have you been doing all these years? I think I was a lowly district border guard last I saw you?” he asked, stirring sugar and milk into his tea.

Rey answered in a clipped tone. “Scavenging.”

Not disheartened by Rey’s obvious vexation, Finn continued. “But look how far you’ve come! It must have taken a long time to fix your speech.”

“On the contrary, it was not hard at all. Master Solo helped me adjust to this way of life.”

“‘Master Solo’,” Finn repeated before pulling a face. “How did you come into his service? It’s a big jump from scavenging for a slum district crime boss to working for one of the most well known Bluebloods in Corellia.”

“It helps when he isn’t like other Bluebloods or upper district inhabitants or even Security Force guards for that matter.”

Finn sighed tiredly and pointed at her untouched tea. “Rey, your tea is getting cold.”

“I’ll pass, thank you.”

“Are you like this to everyone who left Plutt? I’m trying to be friendly but it’s like going up against a wall with you.”

“No, I’m only like this towards people who left to become the very thing everyone in the lower district loathed,” she hissed, fixing him with a look of disgust. “I’ve seen how you enjoy the attention and the admiration people give you.”

“It’s only natural to want to be respected, Rey. But you? You think becoming a bound to someone like Ben Solo is any better?”

“What is that supposed to mean? And I’m bound to _no one_.”

“Rey, I’m trying to warn you. As a detective--” Rey rolled her eyes at how quick Finn was to remind her of his rank. “--I’ve noticed things that don’t add up. No one knows anything about him. He came to Corellia ten years ago and has somehow climbed the Blueblood social ladder with no contest. He’s too perfect. I tried getting permission to search his house but no one will approve it. It’s like they’re scared of him, of what would happen if anyone crossed him. Does that sound like an honest man to you, Rey?”

“I think it just sounds like you’ve become like everyone else in the upper district. You put too much stock on what people say, and you only see what you want to see. Ben Solo has done nothing but great things. He cares more about helping people than your _comrades_ do. I’ve yet to see the so-called Corellian Security Force accomplish anything that could be comparable to Master Solo’s efforts. Isn’t there a murderer still at large in the upper district?” Rey asked, thinking back to the two page spread in the newspaper.

Rey jolted backwards when Finn placed his hands on the table louder than necessary. “ _What do you know about Kylo Ren_?” he whispered urgently.

“I-I don’t know anything?” she said, surprised at the desperation that glinted in his eyes. “I didn’t even know anything about him until the article in the paper a few weeks ago.”

“Ventress,” Finn clarified. “Yes, there’s been more than one suicide that doesn’t add up. I have to admit, I wouldn’t have made the connection if it wasn’t for Dooku. Rey, please you have to tell me. Have you noticed anything, anything at all, strange about Solo? Weird habits? Does he take long leave of absences for no reason? This is important, Rey.”

Standing up, Rey let out a repulsed noise and threw a look of contempt at him. “I’m not helping you smear Ben’s name when he’s done nothing wrong.”

Finn’s eyebrows shot upwards. “ _Ben_?”

Rey snapped her mouth shut and felt her ear heat up. “Master Solo,” she corrected.

“No, you said Ben. What is he to you, Rey?”

“Someone I hold in a much higher regard than you, Finn. Now if you’ll excuse me, I must return to my duties.” Just as she stood up to leave, Finn grabbed her shoulders and shook her gently. “Unhand me,” she seethed, body rigid with her knuckles whitening under the firm grip on her basket’s handle.

“Rey, you have to be careful around him! He’s not to be trusted! You have to believe me! It’s not just you who’s in trouble. My mentor, the one who took me in, his job is on the line! I’ve had to take over the investigation because they don’t trust him with such an important case! If I fail, I suffer the same fate. They’re setting us both to fall. Please, Rey, you have to help us,” Finn pleaded desperately.

Rey tried to pull from his clutch. “I’m not helping the one person who has made you so deplorable. Now, let me _go_!”

“Rey-”

“The lady said to let her go.”

Ben’s cold voice made the two freeze. Amidst their heated conversation, neither noticed the worried looks of the nearby patrons, or the nervous shuffling of the waiters.

Immediately, Finn let go of Rey, hands back by his sides. “Apologies. I must have gotten swept in the heat of the moment.”

Ignoring the detective for a moment, Ben turned to Rey. “Are you alright?”

Embarrassed to be caught in such a shameful situation, Rey quickly nodded and stepped away, moving towards Ben and putting much distance from her past ally. “Yes, Master Solo.”

Ben turned back to Finn just as quickly as he ignored him. “How dare you manhandle my staff. You can best assume your boss will be hearing from me about this atrocity. And here I thought you were a man of the law, Detective Evans,” he said mockingly.

Finn bristled at the taunt and grabbed him by the scruff of his neck, his hands tightening around the lapel of Ben’s coat. “I uphold the law more than you ever did!”

“My, you must have a death wish, laying a hand on me,” Ben chortled before leaning in to whisper in his ear harshly. “Now everyone can see what a traitor to the Force you really are. Jostling and harassing Bluebloods.” Ben clucked his tongue and shook his head, yanking his clothes from Finn’s slacking grip. “I hope you enjoy the rest of your life, Detective Evans. You had best cherish your last moments as a detective before I have a word with your superiors.”

Placing his hand in the small of Rey’s back, Ben ushered her past the still form of Detective Finn Evans.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (honest to god, I was expecting Finn to be named as Evan in TFA cos Evan sounds more like FN :/)


	16. Chapter 16

_Life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. –Charles Swindoll_

 

Chapter Fifteen

 

“I’ve had a word with Detective Evans’ superiors and he has been dealt accordingly. Hopefully, we can put this unseemly event past us,” Ben said a few days later as he finished his breakfast. “Do not hesitate to inform me if you see him again.”

“Of course, Ben.” Rey watched as Ben tousled his hair before shrugging into his thick coat.

“I don’t have too much on my agenda today, so I shouldn’t be gone too long.” As Ben spoke, Rey moved forward to retrieve the tray with only remains of crumbs on it. “Ah ah,” he tutted, taking the tray and lifting it out of her reach. “Let me handle it. It’s the least I can do after getting you involved in such business.”

Smiling, Rey nodded and followed him down the stairs to the kitchen. Maz looked up briefly from the paper and made no comment when she saw Ben place his tray on the benchtop.

“I’ll be back for supper,” he told Maz, looking at his wristwatch. “I should go so I can finish up earlier. Stay out of trouble, you two,” he joked before seeing himself out.

Even though they were short one staff person, there was not a lot of work to be done. Maz had shooed her out of the kitchen when she started to mill around, her body too restless to stay still. “Child, go find something to read from the library. There isn’t much you can help with that I can’t do myself. Just enjoy the peace and quiet.”

Rey wasn’t sure why she was so restless. It felt like something was nagging the back of her mind that kept her alert. Thinking back to Ben’s reassuring words, she had no reason to feel worried and yet she couldn’t stop the sinking feeling within her stomach.

Nearing the stairs, Rey paused when she heard something from the lounge. It was a slight, muffled thump. Investigating the noise, she didn’t expect to see Finn climbing through the window, most of his body already inside the room.

“Finn!” she hissed as she stood rooted in the doorway. She could not believe he would have the audacity to try and break in to find something that didn’t exist. “What are you doing?! You're deluded if you thought you could sneak in and not get caught!”

“Desperation makes a man do drastic things, Rey.” He didn’t seem fazed by her presence, silently  challenging her to stop him. “If it wasn’t for your dearly beloved _Ben-_ -” Rey flinched at the use of Ben’s name. “--then I wouldn’t have to resort to such measures.”  

“Why? Why do you believe that Ben Solo is hiding something? Why are you so obsessed with this?” She didn’t understand why Finn would risk everything he had built.

“I’m to stand trial for harassment against Bluebloods, thanks to Solo’s complaint. There’s nothing left for me after today. As to why I’m doing this? I have nothing to lose and it’s the right thing to do.”

“The right thing to do is breaking into an innocent man’s house to try and what? Convict him of murder?”

In five steps, Finn crossed the room and took Rey by the shoulders. “No, the right thing to do is to do what the system failed to do. Justice. Justice must be served.”

Rey watched him helplessly before racing into motion, running to catch up with him as he started on the stairs. “Stop, this is madness!”

Ignoring her yells, Finn continued up the stairs until she ran ahead and spread her arms apart to stop him. “Get out of my way, Rey.”

“No. If you want to throw away your life, fine but you have to get past me if you want to search this house.” Rey lowered her arms when Finn remained unmoving.

“Don’t make me hurt you.”

Rey let out a snort. “You hurt me the moment you left the gang and put your faith in _them_.”

“And you hurt me the moment you trusted a murderer more than an old friend.”

“Well, it looks like we’ll have to settle this the way Plutt taught us,” Rey said, widening her stance and readying herself to attack.

“It would appear so. I don’t plan on going easy on you just because of our past.”

“ _Good_.” With the final word said, Rey threw the first punch.

The fight was messy. Despite Finn being larger, Rey was more agile and dodged any he threw. She realised with irritation that her uniform constricted her movements, forcing her to only rely on her fists than utilizing her legs as well. She could tell he was holding back, too scared that one of his punches would land and that annoyed her.

At one point during the scuffle, Maz ventured out of the kitchen to see what the commotion was. “Stop that!” she cried, rushing up the stairs in a vain attempt to break the fight. “Stop this at once!”

Unfortunately, neither heard her, both too immersed in stopping the other to notice the smaller woman entering the fray. Maz grabbed onto Finn’s elbow, her bony fingers digging into his arm and pulling it back before he could swing at Rey once more.

The events that followed made Rey’s breath catch in her throat. Finn struggled and tried his best to snatch his arm back but Maz’s hold on him was too strong. He pulled back and forth, yanking the small lady with him until his elbow connected with her nose. Like a bad dream, Rey watched as Maz’s hold on Finn slacked as she fell backwards down the stairs. The sound of her tumbling over each step echoed in Rey’s mind. She stared at the unmoving pile at the bottom of the stairs, eyes wide with shock and horror.

Taking advantage of Rey’s shocked form, Finn roughly pushed past her and darted to the room on the second floor. Rey didn’t care as she was pushed aside, her knees meeting the carpet with a slight burn, but she didn’t feel it. Her whole body felt numb as she scooted down the stairs, hands shaking. She cradled Maz’s head in her palms, her vision blurring as tears swam into view. Something warm dripped onto Rey’s hand, a thin liquid that Rey knew before she even pulled her hand to see the blood over her fingers.

“Maz?” she whispered, barely audible through her closing throat. She felt hopeless and numb. She didn’t know what to do, only shaking the motionless body weakly. “ _Don’t go._ ” Fat drops of salty liquid fell from Rey’s eyes and splattered onto Maz’s serene face. “ _Not you too_.”

_“Come back! Please!” A small girl of five years cried as she tried to run after two figures that continued to walk away from her. “Mother! Father! Please! Come back!”_

_No matter how much she ran, her small legs could never seem to catch up to the two adults drifting into the distance. The younger Rey stopped, dropping to the floor as she pitifully sobbed in the middle of nowhere._

_“Get up, girl!”_

_A familiar voice, Unkar Plutt, pulled her towards him, chains appearing across her wrists as she struggled against the fat waste of a man. “You are to work here. Your family left you to die on the streets. Out of the goodness of my heart, I will allow you to stay here. Pray that I do not regret it.”_

_A dull pain started to throb at the top of her head, worsening and spreading across her face and down her body. Just as she blinked, her body was thrown across the room, saliva choking her as a large shadow hovered over her._

_“You disappoint me, girl,” Plutt snarled as he gave her midsection another kick._

_Suddenly, he was gone. Rey cradled her stomach, fingers rubbing at her skin frantically as the sharp pain disappeared in a blink of an eye. She looked down in shock but screamed instead. The peaceful face of the elderly lady she had come to deeply care about laid in her arms. She seemed to be asleep, except her body was stiff and cold. Rey dropped it in shock, backing away like her life depended on it. She curled up in a corner, body shivering as a thumping started to fade into her dream._

_“Get. Out.”_

_Ignoring the snap of her neck, Rey gaped at the Ben in her dream, looking down at her in disgust._

_“Get. Out,” he repeated, his normally warm eyes now uncaring and frigid. Rey’s heart skipped a beat at his uncaring voice and then startled as he morphed into the man she once called friend._

_Shaking his head, Finn opened his mouth and asked sadly. “If you had just let me search the house, this wouldn’t have happened.”_

_Rey put her head back down and clutched the sides of her head. “Stop, stop, stop, stop,” she chanted, her body trembling like an earthquake was destroying her life._

The thumping got louder and louder until she felt the corners of her mind ebb away.

_THUMP! THUMP! THUMP!_

Rey’s mind snapped to the present, eyes darting up as she saw a set of black boots run past her and towards the basement. Slowly getting up, she stilled as her head spun before getting up to her feet. She looked down and saw her hands stained with blood. Maz’s blood. With her dream lingering in the corners of her consciousness, rage and fury filled her. She started to breathe deeply, sucking air in through her nose and exhaling through her mouth. Rey stalked towards where the sounds of rummaging came from, her head ringing and body without feeling.

Slowly she descended the stony staircase, ignoring the cool basement air as it stung her lungs. Arriving at the basement, she saw Finn frantically searching the dingy room. Remaining quiet, she heard him mutter to himself repeatedly. “It has to be here. I can’t be wrong. There must be something!”

“There’s nothing!” She must have looked frightful judging from the startled shout from Finn. “How could you?”

Finn paused in searching a nearby cabinet and looked at her quizzically. “How could I what?”

“Maz is dead. She must have hit her head when you pushed her down the stairs.” Rey spoke quietly, accusation clear in the air.

“What?” he asked sharply. “You’re joking. She’s not dead!”

“She is! You killed her! Can’t you see what you’ve become?”

Forgetting the cabinet he was in the middle of searching, Finn strode towards her, body trembling at the news. “You’re lying. You’re just saying this to make me stop.” His voice shook slightly.

“Finn, do you remember what is was like in the lower district? You haven’t been there for so long, but even you remember how the Corellian Security Forces were. They saw people dying in the streets, choking on the smog and they didn’t do anything about it. Maz...Maz is gone. It was a horrible accident but you don’t have to go down this path. You can still turn back. You can still be different from the rest,” Rey pleaded. She was so tired. Fighting Finn and losing her friend made her bones weary.

Head dropping, Finn whispered softly. “I don’t have anything to go back to. This is my last chance to redeem myself.”

“What about your mentor? The one who took you in?”

“He…” Finn trailed off, eyes becoming glassy. “He won’t be around for much longer. He was the head detective in charge of the Kylo Ren murders but he failed, so…” He shook his head roughly before staring into Rey’s eyes. She recoiled, seeing an foreign glint appearing in his eyes. “He’s gone because of your Master. Because of _Ben Solo_ ,” he spat, venom laced in his voice. “He is the reason why this whole district is such turmoil. No, not anymore. This ends tonight. **Ben Solo will be brought to justice**.”

It was like he momentarily forgot about her. He turned around and moved to the abandoned cabinet once more, feet dragging along the dusty floor. Seeing his back turned to her, Rey clapped her hands on his shoulders in an effort to deter his actions. “Finn! Stop! Ah!” Rey blinked dumbly, head turned to the side from being unexpectedly backhanded. She brought her head up to look at him only to see determination burning in his eyes.

“You can’t stop me, Rey.” His voice was void of emotion.

Clenching her teeth, Rey charged. Adrenaline coursed through her veins and as she threw punches, blindly attacking him. She cried in shock when he grabbed a fistful of her hair, flinging her around like a doll before pushing her as far as he could. Her face burned and her body vibrated with anger as she crawled to her feet. “You!” Rey swung her fist back as he turned around once more, his mouth twisted into a snarl.

The events of the past two weeks came rushing to the front of her mind as she charged. Hux attacking her. Hux going missing. Finn showing up after years of no communication. Finn accusing the man that she trusted with her life. Maz falling and not moving. The stranger who inhabited Finn’s body. The stress of it all fueled her hatred as she swung her fist at Finn.

When her knuckles connected with the man, it felt different. She had put her whole body into the excessive swing that it turned her whole body towards the ground. A slight choking noise made her look up sharply, eyes widening at the sight before her. With his hands clawing at the thick of his throat, Finn’s mouth hung open as he tried to gasp for air.

“Finn?” she squeaked, rushing towards him and pushing his fingers from his throat. She gently pressed the pads of her fingers against the column of flesh but dropped Finn entirely when his hands came to rake her face. Scooting away as fast as she could, her back his the wall and her body shook violently. “No. No, no, no, no,” she moaned, hugging her legs to her chest as she watched the man struggle to breathe. She didn't know what to do. All she could do was watch helplessly as his arms thrashed wildly before slowly coming to a stop, his energy and life exhausted.

She looked around, unsure of what to do. Her mind was too frazzled to venture towards the body. She didn’t need to check to know that he was dead. Her eyes caught something hanging from a chest that was tucked away to the side, out of anyone’s path. She slid closer until she was in front of the chest and pulled on the fabric that was wedged between the chest’s metal frame.

Curiously, Rey pulled and pulled until it felt like something was stuck. Holding the chest down with the sides of her feet, Rey lifted the lid as far as she could and pulled. More fabric slipped from the small gap but it was the loud clanking of metal on stone floor that made her stop. Rey stepped over the chest and knelt down. It was dark in the basement so she had to fumble along the sandy stones until her fingers grazed something metal.

Holding it up for closer inspection, she saw it was a key. Looking back down at the chest, she slid the key into the lock, surprised when she heard a click. With blood screaming in her ears, Rey opened chest and she felt her heart stop.

Nestled in a flurry of black robes, was a single, round helmet, with silver lines around the eye area. Holding it up, she took a closer look. Each bit of surface her eyes passed over was another stab to her chest. A deep betrayal that shook her to the core.

She was so startled that she didn’t hear the pitter-patter of hurried steps until she heard her name.

“Rey.”

 


	17. Chapter 17

_Start where you are. Use what you have.  Do what you can. –Arthur Ashe_

 

Chapter Sixteen

 

She used to think his voice was soothing and reassuring, but now, she wasn’t sure. Everything he said seemed to be a lie. She cried softly, fresh tears falling and restaining her cheeks.

“No, shhh shhh,” hushed Ben, taking Rey’s face into his hands. She whimpered at his touch. “Please don’t cry, Rey. Please. I never meant to drag you into this. Rey!” Her eyes snapped open at the sound of her name. “Stay with me.”

“Why? What is this?”

“This is who I am, Rey. I am Kylo Ren, but I am still the man you know. I am still Ben Solo.”

“Why would you do any of this?”

“Rey,” he said sympathetically. “You would do the same if you were in my position. None of them deserved to live. They were a waste of space. They would be mourned for a day, at most, before they were forgotten, like a distant memory.”

“I wouldn’t. I wouldn’t become a monster like you,” she wailed, Finn’s unmoving body in the corner of her mind.

Ben regarded her with sad eyes. “No, you wouldn’t. You’re better than me or Evans or anyone in Corellia,” he said softly. “I tried to not become that monster, but you, you won’t become one.”

Choking on her tears, Rey threw her head in her hands, fingers clenching at her scalp, pulling at her hair roughly. “But I did! I _killed_ him! I punched his throat and he started to choke and I did _nothing_ and now he’s _dead_!” she shrieked, her voice becoming shrill. “I need to turn myself in. I can’t stay here. I don’t deserve to stay here. You!” Rey stabbed a finger at Ben’s chest. “You may be able to live your life after this but not me. I can’t. I couldn’t.”

“No, no, no, please Rey, stay with me.” Ben grabbed her hands and brought them to his lips, pressing them into her knuckles desperately. “You can’t turn yourself in. You’ll _die_. I won’t let that happen. You may not be so selfish but I am. I’m not letting you go.”

She laughed hysterically. “Even if I didn’t, what are we going to do about Finn? He’s still a detective. People will still look for him!”

“Do you trust me?” The speed of his question threw her off-guard.

“What?”

“Do you trust me?” Ben repeated. “I can make this all disappear with our innocence intact.”

Rey narrowed her eyes. “What are you saying?”

Sighing, Ben couldn’t help but curl the corners of his lips in a sardonic smile. “I’ve been doing this for ten years. Getting rid of bodies, making excuses, covering my tracks, all of it is second nature to me.” Rey stared blankly at him. How could she trust anything he said? As if reading her thoughts, he kissed the tip of her nose and continued. “I’ll move the body and make it look like a suicide. His throat collapsed, so it will be easy to hide. Don’t worry Rey, you won’t get in trouble. Please, Rey, trust me.”

With her body still trembling, she knew she was utterly useless. Her eyes stung and her nose wouldn’t stop leaking. Unable to fully process the situation, she nodded slowly. Ben helped her to her feet, detangling her limbs and slipping her hand around his shoulder. They both moved slowly towards the foyer, her weak legs slowly walking up the stairs. Nearing the open entrance, Rey saw Maz’s dead body. “Maz!” She untangled herself from Ben and dropped before the old lady. Caressing the tanned skin, Rey tilted her head and pretended that she was asleep. However, she was cold to the touch, a harsh reminder of what had transpired.

Holding Rey close, Ben rubbed circles into her back as she cried her heart out. “It’s okay, I’ll make it all go away. I’ll make everything better again. I’m going to take everything, my robes and the detective’s body. You just stay here. I’m going to need you to be strong for me. I need you call the authorities when I leave and explain what happened.”

Rey’s head shot up. “What? I-I thought-”

Pulling her close once more, Ben cradled her, gently rocking her back and forth. “The best way to avoid suspicion is stick to the truth as close as possible. What exactly happened?”

With a shaky intake of breath, she explained the events that had unfolded earlier. At each painful memory, she shivered and Ben dropped a kiss against her hair, his fingers massaging the base of her skull. “Okay, when the Security Force come, tell them everything up until when Maz fell down the stairs. Tell them that there was nothing you could do and that the detective was mortified by what he had done and that he shamefully escaped right afterwards. Can you do that?”

Rey nodded her head, but couldn’t remember much after that. His voice was like a soft hush in her mind, whispering sweet nothings before he reluctantly left her alone. She did what he instructed her to do: she remained on the floor by Maz’s side, waiting until he left before calling the Corellian Security Force. It had taken her a few tries to get the right numbers but she managed to do so in the end.

The guards came with haste. It was always controversial when a complaint was made against a Security Force officer, much less a high ranking detective, only to have said officer involved in a murder.

The police officer who questioned her looked at her with brows furrowed. Rey didn’t pay much attention, head kept down as she answered the questions dutifully, sticking to the story that Ben had told her. “So, he just…broke in? And then when you asked him to leave, he killed that lady and you tried to revive her?”

Rey nodded numbly, eyes still downcast at her hands. “There was blood at the back of her head and she didn’t move. I-I didn’t know what to do. She wasn’t breathing when I got to her.”

“And then what? Evans just _left_?”

“Yes, he didn’t believe it at first either, but when it was apparent that he _killed_ -” Rey choked on the word, her throat burning as bile threatened to bubble over. “-Maz, he ran. He just ran out of the house and away. Since he left, I’ve been here...with _her_.” Rey held her head in her hands once again. She was seated on the stairs, not far from the body.

The man nodded thoughtfully, scribbling down some notes as she spoke. “Alright, I understand, Miss.”

Rey held her head in her hands, silent tears streaming down her face as she remembered the look that was permanently frozen on Maz’s face. Whenever she closed her eyes, the scene replayed in her mind, like a broken record, except sometimes she would see Finn’s shocked face instead.

“Is there anything else?”

The question snapped Rey’s internal nightmare. “No...nothing. I haven’t even been able to contact Master Solo.”

“Ah, yes. Lord Ben Solo. I never paid any mind to him, but some of the things Detective Evans was saying recently made me think. Have you noticed anything different about your employer recently? Specifically, in regards to the dismissal of his butler?”

“No, nothing. Hux broke the rules set by Master Solo and paid the price for it: immediate dismissal. He is a good man, Ben Solo,” Rey clarified, even though it felt like ash in her mouth. “Doesn’t treat anyone unkindly and is fair to everyone.”

“Yes,” sighed the officer. “Something that he should keep in check, if you ask me. There are different districts for a reason and your Master’s actions intentionally stir everyone. Hopefully this is a lesson for him to keep to himself. Nobody likes the disorder he leaves behind, like months ago at the Coruscant Society Gala. If he wasn’t so rich, we would have put an end to his activities.” The officer didn’t look worried saying such things to Rey, only seeing a distressed maid instead of an actual person.

And that was when everything clicked into place. Like the haziness was lifted from her mind, Rey saw everything with renewed clarity. She had her suspicions, but for the officer to speak so frankly made her stomach churn.

The Bluebloods and the Corellian Security Force didn’t care about anyone that didn’t benefit them in some way. Rey always knew that life was unfair, but this was anything beyond what she imagined. If they had their way, she knew that Ben would be completely removed from the picture, their precious upper district untouched and to their liking. Alas, when he appeared, he had the money to make everyone look the other way.

She started to understand why Ben committed all those atrocities. It didn’t excuse him for it, or her, but in the world in which they were living, it was conquer or be conquered. Ben gave them a third option, to live in a world where the hierarchy no longer existed. But now, with what had happened in the past week, Rey wasn’t sure if it was a good idea for her to stay.

She wanted to trust him with every fibre and heartbeat in her body, but she had killed someone. A detective. Someone who had the right intentions but the wrong actions; someone who she used to know. Rey understood what desperation felt like. She understood that an incredible amount of stress was necessary to push Finn over the edge enough to resort to his old ways.

A commotion outside and a familiar deep voice cutting through the annoyed shouts made Rey perk up. She saw Ben push his way through the police officers, panting as if he ran across town. “Rey! Are you alright?”

She nodded as the officer who questioned her stood up, hand raised to stop Ben from coming any closer. “Sorry, Lord Solo, but I have a few questions for you too. Where were you today and where did you just come from?”

“Of _course_ , officer. I was returning from a meeting I had in in the district. What happened? Rey, are you alright?” Ben called out to her, worry and concern painted across his face. If she didn’t know any better, she would have been fooled like the officer was.

“I see,” Ben said after the officer briefly explained what had transpired.

Another officer came up and whispered something in the first one’s ear, making a look of disbelief appear on his face. “ _What_? Suicide?” he whispered harshly.

The second officer nodded and beckoned him to join the group of officers that were packing up and filing out. The initial officer turned to Ben and bowed. “Well, apologies to take your time, Lord Solo. Detective Evans has been found, hanging inside his home.”

Ben nodded regretfully. “This is a tragic time for us all. Ending someone’s life has consequences and sometimes, people suffer a lifetime of guilt while others wither away. You have my condolences, officer.”

Rey stared at Ben. She wondered if he felt any guilt or remorse for what he did. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw the lifeless body of Finn in the basement. Would she be able to sleep at night? Would she be able to live with herself, or wither away with guilt gnawing at her? Rey wasn’t sure. Once Maz’s body was taken away, the police officers along with it, she was left alone with Ben.

“Do you want to rest?” he asked softly.

“I don’t think I can sleep when all I see is _his face_.”

“What would you like me to do, Rey?”  She flinched the sound of her name being said with such sincerity.

“I don’t know.”

Ben looked at her thoughtfully and disappeared into the kitchen. Moment later, he emerged with a tray with a pot of steaming hot tea. “Come.” She followed him upstairs to the library, tucking her feet under her in her favourite chair. The same chair that faced the one where Ben would normally sit.

Rey sank into the softness around her, eyes staring ahead while Ben tended to the fire. The warmth that filled the room slowly chipped away at her cold body. Picking up her tea, she sipped it gently, eyes slipping shut as her body released the tension she had been holding.

At the sight of Rey slowly relaxing, Ben picked up a nearby book and started reading aloud. His deep voice carried throughout the room, soothing Rey’s soul and slowly rocking her to sleep. This was what she needed, but refused to admit. She hated how reliant she had become on him.

Just as she slipped into a deep slumber with her cup still in her hands, she wondered if she would ever be able to leave him.

 


	18. Chapter 18

_The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be. –Ralph Waldo Emerson_

 

Chapter Seventeen

 

When morning came, Rey found herself tucked into her bed. Usually, the bright morning sun would filter through her window, but this time only a dull orange hue bathed the room. She held her head in exhaustion. Her body was weary and she felt like she had only closed her eyes for a second. Sliding out of bed, Rey padded downstairs to the kitchen to make herself something to eat.

As she put the kettle on, she noticed that there was already two sets of plates placed in the sink. She must have slept longer than she realised. Belatedly, she saw the morning paper on the counter, an angry headline splashed across the cover.

> _ Corellian Security Force detective killed civilian before taking his own life _
> 
> _High ranking Corellian Security Force Detective Finn Evans, was found dead late last night in his Corellia home. He was found hanging from his bedsheets secured on his overturned bed when officers tried to contact him in response to an incident earlier that night._
> 
> _Maz Kanata, age unknown, was killed by Detective Evans when he forcibly entered the home of Lord Ben Solo. It was reported that there was a struggle and as a result, the cook was pushed down several stairs, neck breaking and killing her instantly. Continued on page…_

Rey read the article once more before running up the stairs, her tea forgotten. She slammed open the library door and was not surprised to find Ben in his chair, reading calmly as if his life hadn’t fallen apart in the last week.

“I think it’s time you explain everything,” Rey hissed.

Ben bookmarked his page and placed his book down, giving Rey his undivided attention. “What would you like to know?”

“What happened to you? What happened to you that made you _kill so many people_?

He regarded her quietly. “Rey, do remember feeling alone, when you were a child? Do you remember the feeling of your heart yearning for someone – anyone – to be there for you when you needed it? You had a criminal gang to keep you sane, Rey, but me, well, I had the deafening silence to keep me company. I couldn’t tell anyone, much less Maz or Hux, so I kept it inside. I bottled it up and let it fester.”

Rey cupped her mouth in something akin to horror. “That’s what you’re telling yourself?!”

“Rey,” he said softly. “All my pain, all the misery and loneliness. It hurt me so, so much.”

“What about Hux? Why?” she asked incredulously, voicing starting to climb in pitch. “Why would you kill him? He was like _family_ to you!”

“Because of _you_!” Ben roared.

For the first time since coming to his house, Rey finally saw him completely exposed. His emotions and thoughts were laid bare for her. There was no point in hiding any longer and she saw that on Ben’s face. His judgement was entirely up to Rey to decide; he was at her mercy.

“Everything you do is a distraction,” he panted. “Not one that necessarily prevented me from functioning, but one that made me realise I’m no longer in control of what I do. Everything I do, I do it for you.” Ben collapsed against the floor, knees bruising from the fall but he didn’t care. He carded his hands through his hair before tightening them, fingers catching on the strands of hair and pulling them forcibly.

“But you barely know me. You’ve only known me for a fraction of a lifetime compared to him. He was with you for _years_. I haven’t even been here for one!” Rey was shaking but nothing compared to the trembling wreck that was Ben.

Suddenly, Ben surged back onto his feet and grabbed her shoulders firmly, face separated by mere inches. “He betrayed me. He knew what I stood for and threw it in my face. He didn’t trust my judgement any longer and decided his own fate the moment he laid a hand on you.” His eyes softened at the surprise in her eyes. “Well, tried to, at least. Maz told me what happened. I’m sorry that I was not strong enough or fast enough to stop him from touching you, but you’re a fighter, just like me. I would ask that you let me take care of you, but that would be an insult, wouldn’t it? Rey, don’t you see? It’s just you and me now. Us against the world.” He cupped her cheek and hovered just short of her ear.

Rey let her eyes slip shut, hearing his even breathing this close was calming. “Who else?” When Ben averted his eyes, she pushed. “Who else?”

“Unkar Plutt.” Ben spat, as if uttering the name would poison his lips.

“How do you even know about him?”

“What do you think it is that I do? I support businesses, mainly ones that operate in the middle district, and a long list of companies who are eager to please me. Do you remember that time you delivered some documents for me? Well, that business owner mentioned your ‘altercation’ with that criminal.” His face twisted into a snarl. “That man you called leader or boss or whatever was an _insult_ to all living beings. The world is a better place without that smear.”

“So-- So you’re a _vigilante_? Is that what you are telling yourself?”

“Rey, do you know what he did before I ripped the pitiful life right out of his eyes? Do you know what he _said_ when I mentioned your name?”

Rey remained silent, fearful for what would come next. Plutt never held her in high regard, so she was sure whatever he had said wasn’t going to be pleasant.

“He told me an interesting story of how he came by you, Rey.”

“I was abandoned, left to die on the streets when I was only _five_!” She knew this story through and through due to years and years of Plutt telling her, yelling it at her, constantly reminding her of how grateful she should be.

“No, Rey. You weren’t.” The pain on Ben’s face made her heart drop and the high pitched ringing in her ears had become unbearable. “Plutt killed them.”

It was like the floor disappeared, her body and her heart in her chest falling continuously. At the same time, it was like her body was submerged underwater, icy cold water like a thousand needles prickling her head and forcing its way into her lungs. “You’re lying.” It was so hard to even speak.

“When I told him that I was there to kill him for what he’d done to you, he laughed. He laughed until there were tears in his eyes. He laughed and then smiled at me and said that it was about time you found out. Imagine my surprise Rey, hearing that the man who abused you as a child, who _enslaved you_ , merely took you because the irony would be too good for him to pass. The orphaned girl, unable to leave because she thought her parents abandoned her, voluntarily staying with the man who killed them, taking whatever credits they had.”

“Why me?”  She asked softly.

“Extra person to earn credits, only he would never have guessed in his wildest dreams that you would become his best scavenger.”

She had to change the topic. The idea of Plutt being responsible for all her years of pain and heartache was destroying her. “Who else have you killed?”

“Traitors, murderers, thieves,” he listed.

“I was a thief,” she muttered.

“Were you a thief to survive or did you do because it made you feel better? That’s the difference, Rey. You were alone, afraid to leave. They were as close to a family that you were going to get. Despite being beaten, you would still go and do his bidding because all you knew were the lies you were fed. That’s what sets you, and everyone else, apart from them.”

“Them?”

“Bluebloods. Remember, Rey, this is all just a game to them.”

“You’re a monster,” she whispered, fear creeping into her voice.

“How else does anyone survive? How do you destroy a monster without becoming one?” His dishevelled hair fell across his face but his dark eyes still found her. “It’s just us now.” He moved to caress her cheek but the tears streaming down her face made him stop, fingertips inches from her face. “Whatever you decide to do now, I won’t stop you. Whether you decide to leave or stay, I won’t stop you.”

Rey vaguely remembered him leaving her alone in the library, lost in her thoughts. She had yet to eat but she wasn’t bothered by the twisting in her stomach. She preferred the gnawing feeling in her stomach over the nervous unease that took over her mind. A day or two without food was nothing new to her anyway.

It was late into the night when she finally rose from her armchair. She had spent the whole time thinking, nodding off every now and then from sheer exhaustion. She stared at the fire, eyes unfocused until the fireplace was the only thing that kept her company amidst the darkness. With determination, Rey slipped off her shoes and crept through the halls, her socked feet gliding silently along the carpet with one destination in mind.

Ben was cocooned in his sheets when Rey found herself at the foot of his bed, staring down at his serene face. He needed to be stopped. The Corellian Security Force...Rey shook her head. No, they couldn’t be trusted. From her turbulent week, it was all too apparent how corrupt the whole upper district was, from the officers to detectives to the Bluebloods. How could she trust them with this situation?

Taking matters in her own hands, Rey spied a letter opener on his bedside table, the moonlight catching and reflecting on the shiny surface. Grabbing the slender object, Rey carefully crawled on the bed, swinging her leg over the prone body and positioning the tip of the paper knife perpendicular to his throat. She applied a slight pressure, watching as a pinpoint dot appeared on his skin under the knife.

Rey exhaled slowly and repositioned her grip on the knife. She shifted her knees and flexed her fingers. She had to do it. It was now or never.

“You should have reported me when you had the chance.”

Ben’s sleep-ridden voice caught her off guard but not enough for her to pull the knife away from his throat. “I didn’t know you had killed everyone who had wronged me in my life.”

“No, I don’t mean recently. I mean before, when we first met, years ago.”

She pressed the tip further against his throat, the dull edge sinking into his flesh. “What do you mean?” she whispered harshly.

“Rey, sweet Rey, the small girl who used to masquerade as a boy. The small girl who helped an injured man she found in an alleyway one night. The girl who understood that the Security Force could not be trusted. Rey, the girl who was nobody but somebody at the same time.”

“ _You_.”

Ben opened his eyes lazily, his dark orbs watching her through his long lashes. “I recognised you the moment you bumped into me on the street. I was even more surprised when you managed to find your way back into my life, in this very room. The moon was out, just like tonight. You had changed but yet hadn’t at the same time.” He chuckled. “You still had that hair.”

Rey instinctively lifted her hands to pat her non-existent three buns defensively. “You had just killed someone that night, hadn’t you? That’s why you were bleeding.”

“Yes, it was my first. I was inexperienced, but not anymore.” Ben propped himself with his elbows, forcing Rey to sit back and drop her hands to her sides hopelessly. “When I realised you were trying to steal from me, I admired your courage. And then to find out that you didn’t even _know_ me, it was refreshing and-”

“You need to be stopped,” Rey cut in.

He fell silent. “I do.”

“The Force won’t know how to handle you.”

“They won’t.”

Stillness fell around them, each watching the other as if these last moments together were precious. “So what do we do?”

“Like I said, Rey,” he started, bringing himself upright and reaching out for her. “My life is in your hands.”

“You’re a monster,” she repeated, her heart clenching painfully in her chest as her nose started to twitch. “You’re all I have left and _you’re a monster_.” A slight sting to her eyes caught her unaware. “I can’t start over again.”

At the sight of her eyes glistening with unshed tears, Ben wrapped his arms around her lithe form. “I would do anything for you. Don’t think about what should be done, or about what is right. What do _you_ want? Take a chance. Make demands for once in your life, Rey.”

Her words slipped out before she even realised. “I want us to stay together.”

“Then we’ll stay together.”

“Away from this place.” Rey wriggled out of his embrace and pushed his shoulders from her. “Start anew, in a place nothing like this. Where you don’t have to murder. Where you don’t have to deceive anyone. Just, a peaceful life…with me. I need you. I can’t go back out there into the districts, not with what I know.”

Ben beckoned her, pulling Rey to lay with him under the covers. She allowed for her weary body to be guided towards his warmth, her frame fitting easily against his large body. As her head hit the pillow, Rey curled inwards, sighing and rubbing the remains of unshed tears from her eyes. “Promise me, Ben. Please.”

Ben watched Rey drift to sleep, her brown hair long since fallen out of her loose bun and now cascading over his pillow. With his head resting in his propped hand, his other came up and brushed aside tendrils that fell over her face.

“Anything for you.”

When Rey awoke hours later, she was surprised to see Ben’s peaceful face so close to hers, his head nestled on his arm. She reached up and brushed aside his hair, mesmerised by how his lashes fanned across his pale skin. Carefully, she reached up and ghosted her fingertips around his lips, tracing them. Beneath his lids, Rey noticed his eyes dart erratically, his body stirring from his slumber.

Quickly, she pulled her hand away, holding it close to her as if burned. With her head still on her pillow, she watched Morpheus release his hold over Ben. Slowly, his eyes opened, staring at the sight of her so close to him, relaxing once the memories slowly dribbled in. 

"Now what?" she whispered.

"Do you trust me?" 

The question was simple, but she wasn't sure if she did anymore. When he posed the question earlier, she hadn’t answered. She wasn't sure if the man she had grown fond of was even real anymore.

Pushing the covers aside, Rey slid out of the bed, pulling her socks from her feet and freeing her toes to wriggle into the soft carpet underneath. Ben watched her closely, her lack of answer not unnoticed. He followed her down to the kitchen, leaning against the bench as she busied herself with making them both breakfast. When she cracked the fourth egg clumsily into the pan, Ben moved forward and caught her hand before she tried to pry the loose shells from the hot surface. "Sit down, Rey. Let me serve you for once."

Out of habit, Rey sat on the benchtop. Maz never minded when she did so. At the thought of her deceased friend, Rey held her head in her hands, fingers digging into her scalp as if she could scrub the pain away. "We can't stay here." 

A plate of eggs and toast was placed on the countertop next to her. "No, we can't."  

A set of fingers joined her own, rubbing comforting circles into the base of her skull while she continued to massage her temple. "Where can we go?" 

"I know a place. Have you heard of Alderaan?"  

Rey looked at him suspiciously. "Have you killed there too?" 

"No." A sadness lingered in his eyes. "I didn't lie to you when I told you about the Kenobis. They were close to my family and I really was named after  Ben Kenobi. Alderaan is where my family is, no, was from,” he corrected. “But they're not around anymore.” 

"What happened to them?" At his hesitance, Rey pushed further. “What happened, Ben?” 

"Car crash,” Ben sighed. “My parents, along with my only other living relative, my uncle, died when I was just shy of nineteen. My family," Ben paused, looking thoughtful. "My family was wealthy, Rey. The kind that never had to work and they didn't. They enjoyed their lives and kept to themselves. If you mentioned their names back then, only a specific older generation would have known them. But now, no one would have even heard of the Organa-Solo-Skywalker lineage." 

"Then why? Why would you start all of this?" she asked incredulously, hands gesturing around the room. 

Ben laughed cruelly. The way his normally smooth laughter changed to an emotionless one made the skin on the back of her neck prickle. “A man named Mal Snoke tricked me. I put my complete trust in that man when my family died. I had stayed in my family home for a few weeks after they were buried, just me in that house of ghosts. So I made a decision. I decided to leave Alderaan, sell the property and invest my credits, move to a bustling city like Corellia and maybe, I could move on from the pain.”

“Except it didn’t go as smoothly as you hoped, didn’t it?” 

“Snoke was a con artist. A thief. A professional self-proclaimed forger of documents, I found out. He had planned to steal all my credits and leave me for dead. I know I should have reported him instead, but I was consumed by rage and anger and all I saw was red. Then it just…happened. The next thing I knew, I had a wound to my stomach and a dead body at my feet. So I ran. I ran and ran until I could no longer and that was when I met you. Something you said that night stayed with me days after. You said that the Corellian Security Force were not to be trusted. And for that, I was forever indebted to you. If we had not met, I would have blindly trusted them. No, I made sure I covered my tracks and hid anything that would incriminate me. I went back and stole any documents that could link me to Snoke, or to a family that was once in Alderaan, and burned them. I became the mysterious Ben Solo that everyone loved and wanted. I blended in and I was disgusted with what I saw. And you saw it too, Rey, the night of the gala.” 

He was right. The single night pretending to be someone she wasn’t, to masquerade and become a Blueblood made her skin tingle with the treachery that was so prevalent in the Bluebloods. In a sick way, she understood why he did what he did, and that made her no better than him.

She looked at him sadly. “I did…” They were all monsters. 

“Alderaan is an old town. Many families stayed there until the larger cities enticed the newer generations to leave. Nothing much is left there now. It’s… it’s a quiet place, Rey. I think you’ll like it. The closest town is Caamas and it also underwent the same change. The next city that is remotely similar to Corellia is Kuat, and I don’t think it’s advanced to the stage of Corellia or Coruscant yet. Alderaan is a quiet place. You’ll like it, Rey, I promise..” 

“I’m not sure-” 

Kneeling before her on one knee, Ben clasped his hands in hers. “It’s a place of beauty. There are vast bodies of water with nearby patches of green grassy hills. It’s peaceful. If anyone remains there, they would respect the peace and quiet that is now Alderaan. There’s no Bluebloods. Credits and status are not worth anything there. It’s a place to enjoy life.”

Rey sighed contentedly, her eyes drifting shut as he described his childhood home. She could almost imagine it, just like how she did when she was a mere child, desperate to sleep at night. There would be green for miles, stretching further than she could see. The rivers that would flow through the greenery would be clear, like crystals shining and casting small flecks of glimmers against the mossy riverbank. She could imagine what it would sound like, like a soft melody to her ears.

Slowly opening her eyes, she locked onto Ben’s and asked, “When can we leave?” The smile that spread across his face was enough to reassure her of her decision.

Days later, Rey loaded the car with what little she had and with what little Ben decided to bring. She turned around and almost jumped back in shock at the sight of rugged looking man in a crumpled suit standing at the end of the path. Rey remained still but cast wary looks towards the house, hoping Ben would come out soon.

“Sorry for startling you. I had to visit before I left,” the man explained, walking up the immaculate path towards her.

Rey was unsure who the man was. He looked older than herself and Ben but but despite his youthful face, his sunken eyes told another story. “I’m sorry, but who are you?”

“Of course,” he laughed, nervously flattening his suit jacket as if it would make a difference. “My name is Poe Dameron. I was a close friend to Detective Finn Evans. I just wanted to pay my respects and offer my sincerest apologies for what has transpired.”

She scrutinised him. Even though he tried to smile to ease the tension, it never reached his eyes. For someone who was supposedly a high ranking detective, he didn’t dress the part. “It’s fine. Master Solo has stepped inside just a few moments ago. Should I go fetch him?”

“No. No,” Poe repeated, shoving his hands into his pockets. “I wanted to see you. You’re Rey, aren’t you? For everything that has happened, I’m sorry.” He bowed lowly, head kept down as he continued to speak. “I took Finn in from the lowest district over ten years ago and brought him up myself. I gave him the chance he so desperately needed and taught him everything I knew. For it to turn out like this,” Poe stopped speaking, his sentence hanging between them. “Finn mentioned you a few days ago. He said that he reunited with someone he used to run with before he met me.” He lifted his head up and surveyed Rey. “You look good, well fed and treated properly. I’m just sorry I wasn’t able to protect Finn like Ben Solo has obviously been able to protect you.”

“Finn loved you. I saw it when I spoke with him. He believed that what he was doing was right and that it would save his mentor, that it would save you.” Rey couldn’t help feeling contrite, being privy to full story.

Poe chuckled. “It’s no use now. My failure to find Kylo Ren has resulted in my banishment to the lower districts. I have enough credits to survive in the middle district, but if I’m unable to find a job, I’m afraid to find what it would be like in the lowest district.”

“Goggles. And a scarf,” Rey added after a thought. “If you ever end up in the lowest, make sure you have them both or you won’t survive the smog.”

“It’s that bad? I heard stories but I never thought it to be true.”

Irritation niggled at the back of her mind. If someone as high ranking as Poe Dameron had heard stories of what the lower district was like but never tried to fix it, then it showed how little the Corellian Security Force cared for the slums. “I almost died on the streets when I was exiled from my gang.”

“How did you survive?”

“I saved her,” Ben said from the front door. He stood, shoulders taut at the sight of the unfamiliar man speaking with Rey. “I took her in, fed her, gave her a new life and taught her what everyone in this district refuses to see.”

“Lord Solo.” Poe bowed his head politely as he addressed Ben correctly. “I wanted to apologise for the grief my protege has caused. I am truly sorry for the events that have passed.”

Rey watched as Ben looked thoughtful, deciding how to respond. “It’s alright. I’ve decided to leave Corellia and put this mess behind me. I heard that you took in Detective Evans from the lower districts, so you understand why I must leave with Rey.”

“I do. If I could go back and change everything, I would do the same, but the claws of Corellia have me now.” Poe bowed one last time before moving backwards towards the street. “I wish the two of you a peaceful life.”

As the ex-detective disappeared from sight, Rey turned to Ben and whispered softly. “I feel guilty for what we’ve put the poor man through.”

“The cards have been dealt. There is nothing we can do unless we turn ourselves in.” At her silence, Ben cupped her face, ignoring the slight tremor of her body. “Is that what you want? Is that what you really and truly want?” Her continued silence and panicked look was all he needed. “I’m far too selfish to leave you. I would risk everything for you but even I have my limits. You are just as selfish as I am, Rey. I can see it in your eyes. You don’t want us to be apart, but you feel guilt for what you have done. If I could, I would take your pain away, but I’m just a simple man. The least I can do it help you get past it. Please, believe in me again.”

 


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> akfjaskjfa DONE *phew*

_Go confidently in the direction of your dreams.  Live the life you have imagined. –Henry David Thoreau_

 

Epilogue

 

At first, it was hard to resist constantly asking if she was okay. Arriving at his childhood home, Ben saw that it was exactly as he had left it.

It was late by the time they reached the abandoned house. The pair snacked on the sandwiches they packed before leaving Corellia, then pulled back the heavy dust-coated drapes that covered the beds. There were only three bedrooms,and Rey had immediately locked herself in the first one she found. He didn’t stop her; he didn’t try to pry the door open. He only looked at the closed door in sadness.

He took up residence in his old room, his fingers running over the thin sheet of dust that cloaked the picture frames, caressing the happy faces smiling back at him. He’d made peace with the loss of his family long ago but the ache in his heart still remained at the sight of their faces. Tears had long since stopped falling from his eyes, leaving the empty husk of Ben Solo behind.

Until he met Rey.

Thinking about her caused his chest to burn and his throat to constrict. She was like a bright light, chasing away the darkness that plagued his life. At first, meeting her as a child was a quiet reassurance that not everyone in Corellia had hidden agendas. However, it soon became apparent that she was an outlier. He gave everyone he met a chance, with her innocence in mind, but only a few saw beyond the mask he set in place. If they didn’t have ulterior motives, they treated him kindly, which was more than he could have hoped for.

When he heard that Snoke had an intern by the name of Hux, he became curious. He watched the ginger become a lost man with no employer and no possible way to get a job. As expected, Snoke had not taught him anything useful, only giving the young man menial tasks that meant nothing. So he took him in.

Hux was cautious at first, but when it became apparent that his new employer was a man of few words and even fewer staff, the new butler could not ignore the opportunity. Over the years, Ben noticed the butler regarded him with respect. They had only exchanged a handful of words and yet, because he was a man who did not parade his wealth around, he had earned the loyalty of Armitage Hux.

Shaking his head from his reverie, Ben moved from frame to frame until he landed on one that was of his mother laughing. When he met Maz Kanata in a middle district restaurant, he almost snapped the neck of the owner in anger. It wasn’t that Maz and his mother looked the same, but they both had the same look in their eyes: soft, motherly, and warm. If Hux thought it was unusual when an elderly lady named Maz Kanata joined their staff a day after he did, he didn’t say anything.

Sinking into the dusty mattress, Ben cradled the picture frame close to his chest as his mind jumped to the scene he desperately wanted to erase from his mind. He would never forget the sight of Maz lying at the bottom of the stairs in the foyer, unmoving with glassy and lifeless eyes. It was like losing his family all over again.

He wasn’t sure how long he had laid there, staring at the opposite wall while his mind dredged up memory after memory of the past ten years as Kylo Ren. It must have been for hours, judging from the complete darkness that bathed the room.

Suddenly, a faint whimper caught his attention. At first, he thought it was his imagination, but when the noises persisted, becoming louder and louder, he threw his long legs over the bed. He strode through the house with purpose and stopped in front of Rey’s door. He lifted his fist to pound on the thin wooden door but paused, heart racing as her frightened sounds repeatedly stabbed his heart.

“Rey?” he called out softly. When there was no response, he tried the knob, surprised when it turned smoothly.

There in the small bed was Rey, curled into herself and facing the wall. Her shoulders were shaking but there was no sniffling. Only small muttering and the occasional panicked cry.

Nightmares.

Ben knew all about nightmares.

Lying down beside her, careful not to wake her, he gently massaged her head and shushed in her ear. As he continued his ministrations, her knitted brows eventually relaxed and her breathing evened out, a calming slumber replacing her turbulent nightmares. When he was satisfied that her nightmares would not come back, he carefully slid from her bed and padded out of the room, leaving the door slightly ajar in case the terrors came back.

He didn’t know if she remembered the nightmares, or that he had been comforting her, but he never brought it up. Their days became a routine afterwards. Every day, they would slowly clean the house and make it liveable again, replacing worn mattresses with new ones and scrubbing all the surfaces. He’d never forget the way Rey’s face lit up when she first saw the vast green behind the house. He made a trip to the closest city of Kuat the very same day, buying her the tools she would need for gardening.

Days turned into weeks and their conversations were still short and stilted. Ben could see she was still guarded around him, never truly relaxing unless she was alone and surrounded by her beloved plants. At times, he felt jealous when she spent the entire day outside in the sun, but squashed that feeling before it could fester into something unpleasant. Other times, he wondered why she tortured herself, chaining herself to him when she could have left to do anything.

On an abnormally hot and sunny day, Ben towered over Rey’s crouched body, casting his shadow over her sweat soaked form. The back of her neck was red, and her thin dress was stuck to her body. Wordlessly, he leaned over and passed her a glass of iced water, silently pleading for her to take it.

At his movement, Rey froze, hands no longer busily tending to the weeds that dominated the lands. Slowly, she released the shovel in her hand and took the proffered glass, draining its contents as if her life depended on it. She gave the glass back to Ben’s outstretched hands and whispered, “Thank you.”

She tried not to lean into his touch as he placed his hand on her head, his thumb rubbing circles into her scalp. “You never have to thank me, Rey.”

After that, she slowly came out of her tortured solitude. Their house didn’t have a library, but there were still many books on the bookshelves that lined the back wall of the lounge. When Rey returned to her room or went out for a night stroll after dinner, Ben would sit before the fire and read. There was not much else to do, so he settled in his armchair, book in one hand with a cup of tea in the other. It was simple but after years and years of deceit, he needed the monotonous life.

That night, after Rey had bathed and changed into fresh clothes, she joined Ben before the fire, plucking a book from the bookshelf like he had observed so often before. He longed for them to return to the ease of months ago, but he wasn’t sure it would come as easily. When an hour passed with nothing but silence and the turning of pages, he started to accept that it would still take time to mend their relationship. Just as Ben looked up to bid her goodnight and retire to his room, his dark ones met her soft brown ones. How long she had been staring at him, he wasn’t sure.

Then, as if Rey hoisted the weight and burden of the past decade off his shoulders, she simply asked, “What does this phrase mean?”

Maybe there was some hope for them after all.

-

She wriggled her toes, relishing the feel of the soft moss tickling the web of her feet. To see the vast beauty of Alderaan was something unimaginable. The amount of life that stretched over the acres of land took her breath away. Every day, she would savour whatever Mother Nature had in store for her. From the clicking of the insects, to the fallen weathered logs with splotches of moss along its surface, to the way the horizon seemed to drink the sunlight away, paving way for the silver moon in the inky sky, every moment was a blessing to Rey.

Sighing softly, she grabbed the woven basket next to her and hopped off the old tree stump, slipping her feet into her discarded shoes. The sun was rapidly disappearing into the distance, taking with it its warm rays, leaving behind a cool, brisk chill. She hurried back towards the house, basket in hand, laden with fresh fruit and vegetables she had traded with one of the nearby families.

Life in Alderaan was exactly as Ben described it: calm and peaceful. She was thankful that she was able to trade with the neighboring families, seeing new faces helping her overcome her strained mind. Rey found it reassuring that they didn’t prod her with questions. Whenever she bought vegetables or meat from them, they simply smiled at her and patted her shoulder comfortingly. At first, such gesture put her on edge, but after the second week trading with them, Rey grew accustomed to their friendliness. Now, she anticipated her long walks to the neighbouring houses. It allowed time for her to experience and truly see what was around her.

Following the worn trail back to their house, Rey’s hand dropped to her side, fingers brushing along the tall grass that lined the path. Soon enough, she came up to a white house with a grey tiled terracotta roof and a chimney sticking out from the side. Various vines wound itself up the banisters of the porch and along the edge of the roof, heavier portions dangling above the veranda like it welcomed Rey home. The houses in Alderaan were all like this, simple and plain looking. There was no pollution, no smog, and no engines so there was an absence of brass pipes and reinforced copper along the house.

As soon as she stepped through the threshold, a thick warmth swept over her body. She distinctly heard the popping of firewood from the lounge and shrugged herself out of the woollen coat she had on. She made her way through the house towards the kitchen, and started to empty the contents of the basket on the kitchen counter. A set of large hands, rough from the cold air, took some root vegetables from her.

“Have a nice walk, Rey?”

She nodded. “Mr. Antilles packed some extra carrots and sweet potatoes. He mentioned he hadn’t seen you in a while.”

“Hmm, maybe I’ll join you next time.” Ben washed the vegetables and started slicing them.

With a cup of water in hand, Rey leaned against the wall and watched as he busied himself with cooking dinner. Sometimes, she wondered if he was tired of her silence, or of her standoffish nature. The fact that he hadn’t questioned her once since arriving in Alderaan was a small blessing. Months had already passed since they left Corellia.

“Rey?”

Rey looked up at her name being called. “Sorry, what were you saying?”

Ben looked at her worriedly. “Dinner is ready.”

Their meal was taken with amiable conversation but Rey’s head was still elsewhere. As they settled in their armchairs in the lounge, she couldn’t help but ask herself: How could he be so patient with her? She didn’t understand.

When they first arrived in Alderaan, she could barely look at him without seeing dead bodies around him. It wasn’t his fault, it was all her own mind that tortured her. Whenever she closed her eyes, she would see the wide eyes of Finn staring back at her, shock and surprise as he grasped his neck for air. Other times, she would see Maz lying against the marble floor, cold and unmoving. The memory of her nightmare still echoed throughout her mind when her eyes pried themselves open in the mornings, body tired and weary from reliving that night.

Eventually, it became easier to wake up. Her body stopped being tired and the nightmares disappeared, only to be replaced by distant dreams of a man caressing her head lovingly.

Nowadays, she woke up with her heart pounding in her chest at the feelings that stirred within her. She didn’t think herself worthy to love anyone. She had berated herself for days until she gave up fighting, welcoming the soft touches that only came to her at night.

One night, Rey jolted awake suddenly, eyes darting around, searching for what had woken her. It was the first night where her dreams of comfort were absent, only darkness and nothingness. Tiredly, Rey got out of her bed and crept towards the kitchen for a drink. As she passed Ben’s room, she paused, heart caught in her throat as she heard it.

Crying. Soft whimpers. Slight sniffles.

It was muffled through the door but it was definitely there. Twisting the knob, Rey opened the door and her breath caught in her throat at the sight before her.

Ben was curled into a ball on his bed, back pressed against the wall, shaking as he murmured something in his sleep.

Rey quietly tiptoed towards him, straining her ears to decipher what he was saying.

“ _Ey…R…ey…Rey_ …”

For a second time, she saw him open and unguarded. She could only imagine what he was dreaming about but to see him coiled within himself with his hands clutching the sides of his head, made Rey see a side of him she didn’t think exist. He wasn’t the cold blooded killer that was Kylo Ren. No, she just saw a boy who got lost along the way, and didn’t know how to fix the mess he had made. She saw remorse and pain, ten years’ worth of agony, haunting his sleep.

Soundlessly, Rey slipped next to him and brought the covers over the both of them, prying his fingers from his hair and holding him close. As she cradled him, she felt him stir, his shoulders becoming stiff as she hummed melodically.

“Shhh, it’s okay. I’m here.”

“I miss you…so badly…don’t leave me,” Ben moaned softly, burying his face into her nightgown. “ _Please_.”

“Shh, it’s fine, Ben. I’m not going anywhere. You’re not alone anymore.” Rey felt something wet trickle down her cheek. When had she started to cry?

His hands snaked around her mid-drift and clung to her desperately, the pads of his thumb rubbing into her soft cotton-clad shoulders. As her own soft sobs started, Ben pressed his lips on her cheek, the saltiness of their tears mixing and becoming one.

“Neither are you. We’ve got each other. Trust me. It’ll get better.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And there it is~ 
> 
> I certainly didn't expect it to become this long but I am _over-the-fucking-moon_ that I was able to write everything I wanted in my story. To write this amount and complete it _without_ including any smut is unexpected and challenging for me so I'm really happy with the result! :D
> 
> I have a bad habit of making bajillion series because I like to keep everything ordered on my ao3 SO yes, I'm currently writing a one-shot that takes place a few months after the conclusion of this fic and then that's it.
> 
> Thank you again to the mods at the [Reylo Fanfiction Anthology](http://reylofanfictionanthology.tumblr.com/) for their support to all the writers involved in this project. Everyone has put a lot of passion and effort into their fics so make sure to check them out! :D [Masterpost Here](https://reylofanfictionanthology.tumblr.com/post/151841246182/reylo-fanfiction-anthology-fics-masterpost-and)


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